Fallen - Chapter 005

Chapter Five:




The limo arrived and whisked us to the hotel. It dropped us and then, took Jerry to his home.



Dave asked, “Do you feel better about him?”



“Yes and no. That's as honest as I can be and that's all I can say.”



We went in and as soon as we hit the gaming floor, management was all over us requesting what we needed. I turned to Dave. “Let me tour, but let me have a cart which is going to get me over there. I want someone who isn't upper management here and please don't try to fool me because I can smell management a mile away.”



“Ok”



He turned, “Get me a bellhop with a golf cart. Put him on Rhette and make sure he doesn't tag real close unless he's requested to be there.”



They took off and I said, “Thanks Dave. Take a look at the books and see what they're doing. I'm going out and watching everything. I can already tell there's a big dead zone right there and it's pissing me off.”



“Ok.”



I walked and saw instantly the dead zone was because a lot of double and triple reel halve slots were in a bunch. I went over to a pit boss and said, “I need management here.”



“Yes sir.”



I turned and he said, “If you want management, you're going to have to wait for them.”



“You radio and if I don't have them here in fifteen seconds, someone's getting fired.”



He radioed and I looked up at the eye and the sky and smiled. Suddenly, three managers came hauling.



“Yes sir Mr Michaels.”



“First of all, call me Rhette until this place gets bought by another Michaels and then, call him Mr Michaels.”



“Yes sir Rhette.”



“I want one of you with me taking notes. The others can stand on the periphery.”



Samantha came over, “Hi Rhette.”



“Sam gets me guys. I know her, trust her, and she'd have my kids if we got along better.”



She laughed and slapped my arm, “When didn't we get along!”



“Already abusing me!” I put my arm around her and said, “Hon, this is a dead zone. Look at all these slots clumped up. They need quarters and less in here.”



“We're finding they don't work anywhere.”



“Nope, and they won't when someone's worried about the money they're putting in. Get some of those penny slots in here...the ones which play the twenty seven and forty five cents max. You get just as much per roll, but because it's a penny minimum, they think they're not spending a lot. Then, you put the ninety cent max next to it paying a lot back at that max. You'll see everyone playing the max on the others in hopes.

My advice is to put the ones next to it paying out max percentage at the twenty seven on a forty five. They don't know it, but a few will be wise. You'll have money rolling in and these aisles full.”



She nodded, “Ok, I've got that down.”



“And Sam, I hate to be a prude, but I'm going to tell you how I see this...This here is cartoon land. All these video slots versus the actual reel slots is just too much. Yeah, they're neat, but unless I'm getting entertained, don't show me cartoons. Break up the play as the machine resets with the cartoons. Chickens over here is cool. That farmer over there is cool. Gambler is cool but someone has him turned down. Money Storm over there is an old favorite but you need a monitor on that things above to let people see it go into the storm mode.”



“Ok”



“How old is the carpet?”



“I'm told five years.”



“Put down there to get it replaced and you tell them I want policy they get replaced every three years. Now, what's up with that Elvis over there?”



“What's wrong?”



“I was out here in 2000 and that was new. Unless you've got new innards in it, it needs new games, and flashes.”



“Ok”



“Am I going too fast?”



“No.”



“Ok, I'm shooting things at you as I see them. Are all the floors like this?”



“No.”



“Then you get to ride with me on a cart. Be prepared to walk and hold nothing back from me.”



“Will do.”



We walked through the casino and into a back hallway. I went down and into the door of a bar which was at the back of a theater.



“How much are the drinks in here?”



The tender said, “Beer is a dollar and mixed go up to three and a quarter.”



“How much do they pay for tickets to see the show?”



Sam said, “Twenty.”



“For him?!”



“It comes out that's what we're considering break even.”



“When's the contract up?”



“I don't know.”



“Get him out of here. I'll have a list of entertainers coming in we're going to start scheduling every six weeks. Hit them on the billboards hard and don't put multiple faces on the same board. Don't get way out there beyond the one coming and the one after that one. No one gives a shit now who is going to be here in June unless it's June.”



She nodded. “Get the drinks down to a dollar for mixed and quarter for draught. If it's bottle...well, get bottles out of here. Serve them in glasses.”



She nodded. “Ok.”



“Up here. I want pretzels, pickles, and chips. Put complimentary salsa and tortillas on the tables and I want good Red Cactus salsa...not that hideous stuff.”



“Red Cactus?!”



“Made in Quincy, Illinois. It's sweeter and people eat more than they realize. Those pretzels, pickles, and chips are free. Put popcorn out in little baskets and have hot sauce with the popcorn if they want it.”



She nodded



“And hon, white table clothes. Red tells me theres too many stains and no one's taking them off.”



“That's going to be expensive. All of them have it.”



“I'm talking about redecorating the places as soon as I see a room or three.”



“Oh!”



We walked out and down into a bistro. As soon as I went in, I smelled the smell of stale beer.



“Find out who cleans here and put them on sewage. If they can't smell that stale beer, they sure as hell can't clean a bar. Get Ajax ammonia, and Dawn. It'll cut through everything.”



“Ok”



I turned to a barkeep. “When you smell it like this again, you tell her.”



“It's from the tap splash. It's set wrong.”



I turned to Sam, “Get it fixed. Make these people capable of requesting repairs be made. If it's affecting them working here, it's affecting the people out there. Hang on, What's she doing performing here?”



“I don't know. Someone hired her. Why?”



“As fast as the woman can be told to get out, you get her out of here and don't ever let her on Gino's property again. The bitch got drunk in Kansas City and proceeded to call Gino every name in the book. I don't give a fuck who performs here, but as far as I'm concerned, she's never to perform anywhere on these properties again.”



“I didn't know that!”



“And no one does except a few. There's not many women on the face of the planet I'll instantly tell you to get rid of, but that one is on the top five.”



She nodded, “She's gone.”



“When you tell her, you be specific and tell her it's because Mr Michaels told you to fire her.”



She smiled, “Yes....Mr Michaels, or Rhette?!”



“In that situation, Mr Michaels. If she asks for specifics, you tell her Gino's lover who was called a lot of names that night as well. Until that night, I never knew there was such a thing as cornholeer, but she proudly proclaimed it was a word she made up as being a cross between cornholer and queer...which Gino got called both.”



“Oh!”



“Yeah, I don't forgive that from drunks.”



We went out and down into the buffet. “Be expecting me to eat a lot here.”



I went down the back and saw the rotating buffet coming through the wall. I tasted the ribs and nodded, “Someone's still using my sauce. That's good.”



“That's your sauce?!”



“Yeah, the key there is the smoke and the mustard. Rather than brown sugar and molasses, I use dark brown sugar. It gets both at once. Rather than using water, I use tomato sauce. It's thicker than water and tomato juice. Then, somewhere in there is grape jelly or Welch's grape juice if it's been boiled down.”



“Really?!”



“It's high in sugars hon. A diabetic can't eat that without problems. You should have some which are just smoked without the sauce. The same for those over there...oh man, I'm going to eat one!”



She laughed, and I asked, “Do you know when the last time I had a chicken fritter?”



“No”



“Since I learned how to make them. I told them to get them on the buffet and they've got them. Now, look at this because I'll tell you it takes a daring soul to try one with that sauce on it, but get someone to get me a slice of swiss cheese...preferably the lorraine swiss.”



She turned and flagged someone. He took off running and I said, “Have you had one of these?”



“No.”



“Try a bite. It's messier than hell, but all that is, is a fried chicken fritter dipped in the sauce.”



“Mmmm...that's good!”



“I requested this buffet to be mostly smoked and barbecue. How popular is it?”



“On weekends, it's packed.”



“Good.”



“Those corn fritters and the fried corn on the cob are going over?”



“People love them.”



“Fried dill pickles?”



“I don't care for them, but people are surprised when they try them and like them.”



I took one and said, “It's good. I'm happy. Normally, after a while, they get soggy. How about that barbecue carp?”



“Oh man.” she said smiling.



“Hon, you know my Mama. That got put on the menu because of her. We used to go to a place across the river from Louisiana, Missouri called Junita's. She served big huge honkin' fried carp sandwiches like that except with no barbecue sauce.”



“We've got them!”



“I know. Have you had that with a large slice of sweet onion and sweet mustard?”



“Really?!”



“Oh hon, you've got to try it with that and Heinz's sweet mustard. It'll make you slap yo' mama it's so good.”



She smiled, “I take that's a Southern phrase?”



“It's like giving a pat on the back...except yo' slaps yo' mama it's so good.”



She laughed, “I'll remember that!”



“My Mom didn't care for it at first, but once she caught on it's a compliment, she smiled.”



“Your Mom and Dad, I love them.”



“And they love you.”



“I miss your aunt.”



“She's up there saving you a place smiling pounding blisters on her fingers at that casino.”



She laughed. “Do you remember that night!”



“I was in that slot tourney with her. I had the slot machine which went into overload and no one bothered resetting it. Speaking of slot tourneys, do they have them here?”



“No.”



“Why not?”



“I'm not sure.”



“Let's get some machines set up and have them on the hour. Give away the money for the top three spots, but then, I want the runners up to get jackets, theater tickets, and dinners to other points in the casinos.

Let's do it this way, make there be fifty machines and make that entrance fee be ten bucks. They pound like hell for ten minutes and then, they have the top three. There's to be no heats but top three. The top prize it three hundred. Second is a hundred. Third is fifty and then, we give the next ten jackets and the next ten tickets and then all the rest dinners.

If you do that, we we make fifty bucks and write off all the things for the rest. Try it for a month and if it's not popular, then don't continue, but keep the names of the people and if they're out of towners, invite them back compliments of our fleet for a week for a year end tournament for a grand prize of fifty...no, a Cadillac roadster. Everyone thinks they've arrived with one of those and it's great publicity for us to have in ads and internet spots.”



She smiled, “Ever the promoter!”



“Hon, it garners us attention whereas the others aren't going to think about how a little adds up to the bottom line.”



We went down the hall and I said, “Watch this.”



“What are you doing?!”



“This door is mine. No one else has the key to it in any of the casinos.”



“I've seen the door there, but I never paid attention.”



“Come on in.”



We went in and I said, “It's dusty in here. I guess I should've designed in some ventilation.”



She laughed. “What is it?”



“This is the tattle tale room.” I kicked on the monitors and watched the eyes in the sky room being monitored. “Never underestimate those you pay to watch others. Sometimes, they're not trustworthy.”



“Oh!”



“Yeah, now you know what they do up there when they think no one is watching them. You see, they know you're coming before you get there, so they can behave.”



“What's he doing?”



“Well, he's definitely fantasizing while looking at that monitor. I'd say he's playing pocket pool.”



She laughed, “Oh man!”



“Don't shake his hand. It's not lotion!”



I shut off the monitors and said, “Hon, you get a key but no one else. Gino had a key, but not even Dave has one. You and me. There's an old vcr machine over there which was high tech back then.”



We stepped out and walked down the hall. I stepped out and said, “Exactly where it should be!”



“Where are we?”



“Out in the courtyard behind the palms. This is a soda can I put here to see is it ever got cleaned. It's been here twenty years and counting. Go figure.”



“I'll get some people on it.”



“Hon, don't. It just tells you a body could lay back here and no one would ever find it. It stinks our security is so lax...but that could've been a rattle snake, or a body, or someone putting a bag of cash and no one would have found it.”



“I don't like that.”



“That door was put there without a handle for me to get out instead of running all the way around. Back then, I was into laying out in the sun hours on end and fortunately, I saw the distance how far it'd take for me to get out there to that door over there and it made no sense.”



“I'm glad to know it's here.”



We stepped back in and went down the hall and out into the shopping area.



“It hasn't changed in twenty years. It's got to change.”



“I'm told nothing's changed in that long except the security.”



“And that will change.”



We went out to the front and onto the cart. As we went through the casinos, I spotted flaws and danger points. I told her and by the end, we found ourselves in the Italian kitchen with me melting provolone cheese over three sticks of bread. “People want mozzarella sticks, I'd kill for these.”



We ate and she said, “You love food so much and never put on weight.”



“Water never gets fat because it's constantly in motion. Think about that because I'll tell you something. In my shower at each of my houses is a sport water bottle. When I take my shower in the morning, I fill it and make sure I drink it all before I get out. Then, at night before I got to bed, I take my shower and drink that water.”



“Don't you have to go pee?!”



“Yeah, but you need to realize I go to bed when I'm tired and wake up a few hours later. About once or twice a week, I'll sleep longer up to six or eight hours and then it normalizes. However, let me tell you something.

When I was working the die cast plant 11 to 7, I'd get so tired at five am, I'd be damned near hallucinating. What I'd do then, was I'd lie to myself and say, “It's Tuesday, you can sleep in next weekend. Of course, the weekend would get there and I'd be up saying, 'It's the weekend, why sleep in!' So, I conditioned myself to go without sleep and now, two hours is normal and six or eight is making me feel robbed.”



“Really?!”



“No one can keep up with me on it. This is my kind of city because I go all the time. New York is going to be my kind of city because it's on all the time.”



We ate and I said, “That provolone isn't real.”



“How can you tell?”



“Feel your teeth and that feel which feels like heavy latex?”



“I'm not getting what you mean?”



“Hon, take the rubber band and put it in your mouth. Chew on it a while and you'll get that feel of latex against your teeth. That tells me when milk products are cut. That's why I won't buy store brand goods on anything and will only buy Land O' Lakes. A lot of them cut their milk products with Whey and Guar Gum. It preserves it more, but it also gives you that feeling on your teeth.”



“Hmmm, I didn't know that!”



“Find out who we're getting our milk goods from and call them on the carpet over it. Tell them if they insist they're not cutting it I'll take care of the matter personally and WILL terminate their contract confiscating all goods and running independent lab tests on them to see if we're getting what we paid for. IF we find out they've cut them, we'll certainly sue likewise.”



“I'll get on it.”



“Find out who supplies the Kraft foods cheeses and see what it's going to cost us in difference and then ask yourself if five paying customers think it's fake per day, how many per year we've lost. I bet you the difference we're paying isn't that much.”



“What about Land O' Lakes?”



“Sure, if you can get a good bulk price on it. The stuff is expensive as all get out though.”



She laughed, “Ok.”



“Hon, let me tell you some tidbits and secrets to buying bulk. If you buy 100% real butter in the plain unmarked wrappers, it's real and doesn't cost that much when it's in boxes of fifty. They usually don't look at it, but if you look at 100% real butter, sour cream, and all those goods, you're usually getting the good stuff.”



“I'll let them know.”



“There are some things in here which I've put my foot down on and made it company policy. For instance, those pastas are all made fresh and those sauces are all made fresh. The day it's ever changed, I better be in a grave because you will see a poltergeist throwing a helluva fit in this place on that day and most likely each and every time it happens.”



She laughed, “Now, let's talk about your love life.”



“Ooh, not good.”



“Why?”



“When did we last speak?”



“You and Steve were together.”



“Ok, Steve and I aren't together. Since him, there's been one other and he and I just split today. He looked as good as Steve, but now he and Steve are together.”



“Huh?”



“I have better security in my houses than this. I pay someone to watch the security and he got ahold of Dave. Dave gave me the news and I watched the monitors on the incidents. Needless to say, they watched gay porn on my jumbotron down in the basement and made out in my recliner, on it, over it, and however you want to say it.”



“Oooh”



“Yeah, but then I find out my Rolls now has different tires under it and he was growing pot in my potting shed. He got told to get out and Steve showed up. They went off together and I wish them well as long as they stay away.”



“SO, anyone new?”



“I'm not saying. There's someone I could fall for easily, but he's being tested right now. If he passes the test, then I'm going to see, but that's all I can say. What's nice is Dave sees how he feels about me and so does everyone else. It's not my hopes and blindness with it this time.”



“What's that mean exactly?”



“I'm not the best judge of men who are suitable in my life. Kevin was great while it lasted, but then that went bad. In between then and now, there've been some real doozies and there've been some sweethearts who turned into doozies. With this one, there are a lot of personal reservations which just scream at me not to do it.”



“Why?”



“Let me put the ball into your court and then, you'll see.”



“Ok”



I went over and put the dish in the machine and said, “Let's walk.”



She smiled, “You DO stay in motion!”



“I want to see rooms. Find me an open room in each hotel. We'll go through them.”



“Ok”



She pulled out her phone and wrote down numbers. “Got 'em!”



“Good.”



As we walked, I asked, “When you were a young teen, did you have a guy you were hot for who you later dated?”



“Yeah.”



“Have sex?”



She blushed, “Yeah.”



“Good?”



“Not all that good.”



“Mine was so-so, but I trained him to kiss and all the rest was made up for that.”



“Ok”



“Now, put yourself at my age.”



“It's not that far off.”



“How old are you?”



“Thirty two.”



“Really?!”



She smiled, “Really!”



“I would've sworn you were in your early twenties.”



She laughed, “Thank God I'm not!”



“Ok, let's do it at your age then. What would you think if you saw a guy at your age now, walk in and he's the dead ringer for that guy you were with when you were a teenager.”



“Oh!”



“Yeah, big ohs. With this one, I first saw him a year or so ago and instantly, I knew who his Dad was because there couldn't be that gene pool blessing more than one.”



“Was he?”



“Oh yeah, but what's interesting is I'm being me and he's being him and the attraction formed. I'll tell you I was with Kevin, so there was no way in hell it was happening.”



“So what happened?”



“I saw him at a convenience store and he was all cracked out and about thirty pounds lighter than what he was when we were around each other back then.”



“Oh man.”



“What's bad is I made comments to him back then in jest about telling him if he ever wanted to have his world rocked, this old dude would throw boulders at him.”



She laughed, “Ok.”



“But, this guy walks up to me and gone is the hot kid and there in front of me is a gaunt teeth rotting Beetles wannabe with my ex lover's sweat pants on. He says hi and I'm blunt and ask him who the fuck he is and he tells me by telling me I offered to slam stone at him. Needless to say, I felt gut punched.”



“I bet!”



“Well, he asks for money for food and I told him I'd BUY him food but I'm not giving him money. So, I took him to McDonald's and find out he's with my ex.”



“Which ex?”



“One who turned out to be a crack and meth addict.”



“Man!”



“Yeah, needless to say, things happened and I ended up rescuing him and filling his life so he's not thinking about the drug. He's doing fine, so tonight, I left him back home with my truck and he's supposed to go to his Dad's.”



“Do you think he will?”



“Hon, this day has been about him learning there's surveillance in my vehicles. If he thinks he's going anywhere without me knowing where he went, you really need to know I'm testing him to see if he will.”



I pulled out my phone and dialed up my truck. “There's the surveillance on my truck. As you can tell, he's passed with flying colors.”



“How can you tell?”



“That's the front camera. That's the rear and that's the one showing me the front door of their house. The other is the dash cam which shows the readouts so if I'm ever pulled over and a cop says I was doing x when I've got proof I was going y, it's all there and I'll fight it in court.”



“Oh!”



“Those got put in because Steve arrested me sixteen times.”



“Really!?”



“Yeah, it was a farce, but he got in trouble and so did the Judge. He's appealing his decisions and when they go in front of the appeals board, I'll have all the video there needed.”



“That's good.”



“Now, here's what's neat about this system. Let's go back to when he got in. I can use this slide bar down here and look there, he went to McDonald's and then he went to his Dad's. As you can see, he went in and no car has left with him in it since he entered the house.”



“That's pretty slick.”



“Hon, I'll tell you I'm lax about watching these things when I'm with someone. Until I got told today, I wasn't told of all the incidents with Jess.”



“The guy you were with?”



“Yeah. That's because I don't use this to be insecure. I do it to test like tonight, but I'm happy because I now know he's for real.”



I asked, “Are you ready for a real kicker?”



“Sure.”



“Watch this here.”



I put on “You Can't Do That To Me” with the pictures put in.



“Who's that he's with?”



“Keep watching.”



“What's the song. I like it. It's neat.”



“Listen and watch.”



“Oh man!”



She was watching and when it was over, I asked, “What did you think?”



“Honestly?”



“Yeah.”



“The song is amazing. That video is over the top! It's like I was there watching them!”



“Now, do you want a clue?”



“Sure.”



“Don't freak out on me, ok?”



“I won't.”



I undid my pants and showed her the thong.



“THAT'S You!”



“Yeah, in drag.”



“Oh my God! You're hot!”



“That's my new song. I wrote it this morning and then we did those shots this morning. I've performed it in front of an audience and they liked it, but that's how the video will be.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah, now do you want to hear another one I wrote this morning?”



“Yeah.”



“It's sad. Let's get you some Kleenex.”



“Why?”



“Because everyone who's heard it has bawled.”



“Oh.”



We went in the room and I put the song on and then left her with it while I did an inspection I checked for dust on the window sills behind the curtains, pulled back the bed covers to look for signs the bed was fresh, and went into the bathroom to look for dust and grime in hard to reach areas and behind the door.



When I came out, she was crying, “Oh man! I'm such a baby!”



“No, you're normal. Everyone's done that.”



“It's amazing. It grabs ahold of your heart and just twists the hell out of it. I've been there in relationships.”



“I wrote that because he and I slept together last night and the night before and all the while, I'm nuzzling in his hair with my nose, I'm wanting and know he's wanting and yet, there's something there which just pulls me out. So, I got up out of bed and went to the piano and wrote 'Baby's first verse for what I was feeling for him. Then, it got to be rough and I got to thinking about all the times I've said I'm sorry to people and all the emotions came out.”



“It's powerful.”



“Then, I wrote 'You Can't Do That To Me'. As you can tell, it's me telling him, he can't do it while I'm doing it with him in the video.”



She smiled, “Yeah, and you had the fantasy played out on the video.”



“Where the video will change from what you're seeing hon is when you start watching, you're going to be viewing it like it's a slide projector in the distance...then, you get closer and suddenly, you're there. As the images play out, you see yourself either being her, or him, and you're drawn into it until the final shots are done so you're staring down at the floor and seeing yourself dropping the pictures so it's you who was viewing them.”



“Wow!”



“And yet, no one knows it's a drag queen.”



She laughed, “Did you sing that?”



“All of them. Now, here's the next one I wrote while performing tonight. I performed 'Baby' and everyone was boo-hooing in the bar, so I got up and did this one to make everyone laugh.”



I played it and she listened. As she listened, she laughed harder and said, “Oh man! That's going to be a hit!”



“Those are three of them which are going to be on the album.”



“You're putting them out?!”



“I'm thinking about it. Now, here's others I did last night. Anna gave me the video, so you've got to forgive the amateurishness of it.”



“Video?”



“It's long. My phone stored it, but it's about a gig of memory.”



I played and said, “This is Anna. Don't use her other name because her friends call her Anna.”



“Oh man, you know her!” She realized who was at the piano and said, “Oh my God! You're friends with them!”



I hit pause. “Yeah. She's going back out on tour and when it finishes, she'll be out there at the stadium and so will he. When she starts the tour, those are the songs I'll be performing with her.”



“Oh man!”



I took it off pause and said, “Let me have a piece of paper, I'll give you my inspection results.”



She gave me her electronic pad and I wrote on it...dust on window sills, hair behind door...remember to close door and sweep. Dust on top of clothes hanger rack. Lipstick on blow dryer. Dust around base of nightstand.



As she watched, she said, “You can really do the voices!”



“Yeah, but in order to carry it, I've got to do it in drag.”



“You're good with it.”



I took my phone back and said, “Let's go to the other hotels.”



“What's wrong?”



“Nothing, I'll let you listen more when we get there. It's just I've got an idea and want to see about doing it.”



“What's that?”



“You just gave me an idea as to how to inspect a restaurant! I'm good with it, so why would I send someone else to find out if things have changed? I can go in drag and not be recognized!”



She laughed, “Oh!”



We left and I said, “That room up there will need to be redone, but that's what I've found so far.”



She looked, “That's quite a bit!”



“That's why our stars don't get higher than two. That's bullshit!”



“It'll get changed.”



“Hon, induce them. Tell them the owner wants the inspections to pass and us to be up to three stars. Tell them for each quarterly inspection they pass getting us up to the three stars, we'll give them a ten thousand dollar bonus.”



“That's quite a bit!”



“And when they price compare up and down the strip, ours at two stars will get passed by for three stars in the same price range. How many dollars do you think we miss out on because of that?”



“I don't know.”



“I'm willing to bet you if we've got twenty housekeepers, that forty grand a year doesn't even begin to match up to what we've lost..at that eight hundred grand.

Do you realize for each percentage point we raise for the occupancy rate annually it's ten million dollars?”



“Really?”



“Yeah, so when you see how many people leave here going, “The fuckin' place was filthy', we get a loss of ten million to fifty million. For each we raise it, we get ten million.

When you start figuring all the details it takes to get that percentage point, that thirty thousand for fake cheese, the five point six for all the housekeepers and so on and so forth, you're raising it to be a quality stay and it's raising by word of mouth.

Now, I'll tell you it's the truly pissed off customer who leaves here who goes on the website and just plain rags on us. All the rest say, “Never again” and that's a customer we've lost forever.

When you start getting me increased percentages, I can nod and say, “Thanks”. Your bonuses reflect it and after five percent is raised and kept for a year, I can go on television and advertise to the world our rooms are cleaner and do a commercial where I inspect a room and tell them what to look for.

Suddenly, they're looking at those spots elsewhere and they're wrinkling their noses and saying, “Hon, the next time we stay in Vegas, we're staying there. The rooms are affordable and that man cares.”



“I guess I never thought about it like that.”



“Nope, but when you do, you see I'm back in a full swing of things and you're going to see me really knocking some far out shit out of the park. Did you realize each one of these rooms can be remodeled in a day?”



“For a hotel, that'd be over several years.”



“Hon, you didn't hear me. EVERY one of these rooms can be redone in a day.”



“Really?”



“Take a look at this hallway. What do you see?”



“What am I supposed to see?”



“Here's what I see. I see six foot wide carpeting with the edge already designed in so it looks custom. I see wall sconces which are taken down and I see crown moulding and baseboard moulding to disguise it's wallpaper. If you look close hon, you don't see nails. You see little screws.

All that moulding comes off and this entire hallway gets papered with paper designed not to be up and down, but to be sideways so it's rolled down and glued NOT PASTED on over the other. The carpet is able to be removed in a flash and what you're looking at will take a crew of men a day to accomplish.

In the rooms, the way it goes is we've got crown moulding and baseboard. We've got the furniture screwed in and all that can be removed and replaced. Once again, the paper goes in and the furniture gets replaced. Boom, you've got carpet people in and they've got the old ripped up and the new put down.

With the right crew of guys being prepared, it's an hour. With enough crews, it's done in a day.

Now, guess how much it costs to redecorate a room and that means new furniture, all the fixtures, and everything?”



“I don't know.”



“Sixteen thousand dollars if I hire it out and four thousand if I hire crews and buy the materials. To build a hotel, it costs me on average forty thousand a room. That's baseline without the décor. It costs me fifty grand a room to put up a hotel.”



“You've got this stuff down!”



“It's about knowing the bottom line. It's about knowing how fast it can be done because God forbid someone burn to death in a room while smoking in bed, I'll tell you that room is gutted out and replaced in one day. It's not out of commission and it's making us money.”



“Really?”



“It's designed in. Now, let me tell you something. Do you remember when you were a kid and the Russians were shooting at their leaders in their White House with tanks?”



“No.”



“Well, if you'd remembered, you'd see this basic shell. All the walls here are concrete. All the floors are concrete. All the concrete is super reinforced with fiberglass strands instead of just plain reinforced with rebar.

My reason for wanting it was because I didn't watch that scene unfold over there thinking, “Oh how terrible!”. Instead, I saw it and asked myself, “Who in the hell designed that building!” Because that puppy stood after taking repeated cannon blasts from a tank and it stood proud. Yeah, it burned and yeah, it was a mess, but what I learned from it is if you design in you're going to be protected in years to come.

That's why I can redecorate in a day and that's why it's going to take more explosive to knock this fucker down if it should ever come down.”



“Do you think it will?”



“Nope. We're building on and adding more. What I will say is we didn't get fucked on these like we did the first three. If you've noticed, these rooms are sixteen wide whereas the first three are thirteen wide.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, the architect changed it into the design without asking. No one realized what he did until they were built and I was standing there raising six kinds of hell.”



“I bet!”



“Now when I see the first three, I see them and it pisses me all over again.”



We toured the rooms and she listened to the songs as I inspected. When we got to the first one, I called Dave, “Where are you?”



“Crown Suite.”



“I'll be up.”



I turned to Sam. “I'm going up. You might as well come so I can give him the verdict. Be ready to hear all I've said for these past two and some hours put into a few sentences.”



“Oh man!”



“Yup! It's not you, but I'm not happy.”



She chuckled. “I'm glad it's not me.”



“Hon, you're over the casino floor. I know what you do. I know they hoped you'd go with me so they'd not have to face it, but now is the moment of truth.”



We went up to the Penthouses and I went in. Dave stood, “So, what's your opinion?!”



“Let me sit down and then, I'll give you a rundown.”



We went over and I said, “Dave, Sam. Sam, Dave.”



Dave smiled, “I know Sam.”



“How wellllll? Do I hear nuptials?! Huh?! Huh?!”



Dave blushed, “No!”



“Damn! I was hoping to get you someone I'd approve of.”



Sam chuckled.



I breathed in real dramatically and let it out. “Remodel, redecorate, update, fire a manager, and get someone over the kitchens who knows what the fuck they're doing.”



“Huh?”



“Not a thing has been done to these places in God knows when...if ever. They tell it and I'll tell you I feel like I've taken a trip through the Queen's closets because there's moths in this place for how old it's panties are.

In regards to the casino floors. The machines are aged and what we've got is just plain junk. What new we've got wasn't bought with mindfulness to enticing them to spend more, so they're not.

The restaurants have problems and the quality you'd expect is just plain value priced away. Whoever's doing it isn't ordering with care it takes to keep a customer, but to make profits. We're making profits while our diners are gagging.

In regards to management. There's just a lot of sloppiness which is everywhere. She's seen it when it's been pointed out and now, she knows what I look for. I'm not Leona Helmsley here, I'm Rhette and I'm definitely not around here because if I were, the bottom line would be up and our numbers would be also.

Down in the American bar, you've got a bar which smells like a bar. The man's dealing with a splash under a keg tapper which doesn't drain as much as it puts it down the wall and in behind. How many drunk roaches we've got there is unknown, but if you see a few staggering around, I bet you I know where they got sssssuds up.”



He smiled, “It takes money Rhette.”



“We're making money. Now, my decision is in front of you and I'm telling you we're going to remodel, redecorate, fire some management and we're going to start treating this place like it's our only source of income. Our customers deserve it and we certainly will be able to do without the profits until they're repaid in the added revenue.”



“It takes time.”



I turned to Sam, “How many days does it take to redecorate and remodel a hotel?”



“One”



Dave looked shocked, “Really?!”



“Dave, you and I could tear out an entire wing in one afternoon with a power screwdriver and a putty knife. Does that tell you how hard it is to put stuff back?”



“Show me here.”



“Get me a screwdriver with a number ten torx head.”



“I'll get one.”



“No, fuck that. Get a drill with a number ten torx head. I'm not damaging my limp wrist for these fuckers!”



He smiled, “And a putty knife?”



“Yeah. Stand up because we're moving furniture. While you're telling them to get you that putty knife, tell them to get one with a handle from a broom on the end. They've got one, or tell them to get you a straight hoe, it'll work just as good.”



He called and I started moving furniture. When it was over to the side, I said, “Sam, take a look at this.”



I went over to the corner of the carpet in the sunken living room and pulled it up.



“First of all, that shouldn't've happened, but then again, the tape underneath is twenty years old.”



I started pulling and took it up across an edge and started rolling. Dave looked surprised. “That's it?!”



“Hon, it's put down to look good. It's made to take up with speed. Now, when you've got all these pieces pre-cut, they get laid fast. Use this coming up as a template and you've got the piece to go down. I don't care if it's a parking garage, or where, but you can have a crew cutting at the same time these pieces are coming out.

Down in the rooms, the carpets are all the same. Either they're a left hand or a right hand, but we designed that out with the newer ones where the same pieces all go down.”



I went over to the wall and said, “Dave, we had the wall paper specially designed to be put on sideways. This moulding here is because that piece up there is the same height as the hallway. It's the same wallpaper and this down below is a forty inch custom roll which we had made for that. You remove the mouldings and you put new on over the others and all you do is take down the wall sconces.”



I turned to Sam. “Sam now knows what I see when I look out in the hallways. She knows what it takes and she knows it's possible to do this place easy.

Up here, none of this furniture is screwed into the walls. In the rooms down below, they're screwed. There are three screws for headboards, two in a chest of drawers, three in a dresser, two in a mirror, and the armoire has none...it's freestanding.

If you think we're going to take a loss on the furniture, think again. We depreciate it out over four years and even the new ones are that old. When we put it up for sale, we sell it to liquidators who give us a lot price. I'll tell you it's damned low, but we could sell a lot of the carpet for twenty bucks a roll and the bedroom furniture for a hundred dollars a set and be fine.”



He said, “Ok, you convinced me. Now, how much to do a hotel?”



“Rooms are about five thousand top end. That includes mattresses and everything including a new phone system. We need to put in the new N wireless, so figure to put out for those antennas in the hallways.”



“How much are those?”



“Figure five grand a room for the seven hundred rooms and you've got a good price for everything. Down in the dinings, theaters, and shops, it's going to be more. And you really should let Sam do the ordering of the slots because she knows what I want and how to make this place pay big.”



He looked at her and said, “Go get me the catalogues and we'll start with that.”



She left and I said, “Figure the prep to do the rooms to be two weeks. That's unpacking furniture and getting it all put into a parking garage and having it ready. You can have the rooms, carpets, wall papers, and everything all ready so when they get going, they're moving.

You can also figure it's going to take a crew of ten guys per room to take about an hour to rip out and about two hours to have you a full room ready. IF they work twelve hours, you'll get three rooms per group. You've got seven floors, so that's a hundred rooms and ten men, so a thousand guys plus your hallway people.

Electrical guys better not take that long. All they're doing is putting up new wall sconces and that's not hard.”



“If we hire it done, how much will it cost?”



“Sixteen grand a room. They do it and they'll take their sweet time doing it. What I will tell you is you can order the stuff and get a warehouse rented to get everything in. If you put it at six months away, you can have this whole complex...all seven done in a month tops.”



“What's this about the restaurants?”



“In old world, we found them using fake cheese. I don't know if they ordered it that way, or if we're getting shorted that way, but it's fake. It just feels like latex against my teeth. When I pointed it out to Sam, she figured it out too.

What you need to know hon, is these people are getting paid to give a fuck and aren't. They don't know what to look for and everyone from the management to the cleaning staff is just not getting it done.

In all the theaters, we've got red table cloths. I'll tell you Gino was kicking the shit out of me when I saw that and she told me all of them have them in them.”



“I probably approved that.”



“Bad move. White says the place is clean because you can't hide a stain on white.”



“Ok, I wasn't aware of that detail.”



“The carpets in the casinos aren't getting replaced out every three years. They're grungy and just plain disgusting in some areas.”



“How can you tell?”



“Someone in their infinite wisdom moves slot stands. They fail to realize under where they were are nice and new compared to where they aren't. You've got bright gold versus damned near gray in areas. It tells me as a customer this place is not doing so hot on the money and they're probably not putting out money because they're about broke. You and I know that's not true, so we better start paying attention.”



“Ok”



“My next big complaint is on two pool decks on the patios around the pools, I found chewing gum which is black and scabbed over. A power washer would've taken it away and a blow torch would've done it quicker with a putty knife. It's telling me maintenance is sloppy and probably growing some incredibly fat asses sitting around instead of working, or their management is keeping the crews so pared thin they don't have time to the details.

In short Dave, we've got three billion worth of hotels standing here I wouldn't give you two hundred million for as they stand. I can keep going because you should know I saw things which just downright disgust me.”



“Name another.”



“Parking lots which are seal coated. Yay rah, someone sold you some seal coat. What they didn't do was they didn't fill the pot holes before they painted the fuckers black and yes, I did say black paint instead of the real stuff.”



“Oh man!”



“I checked and thank God it's oil based instead of latex, so we're fine there, but we're really looking at some twenty year old asphalt out there which needs to be chipped up and relaid. Yeah, it's expensive, but I can get you all the equipment to do the job for about forty grand and have you a crew doing it for about three grand a day and have all of them laid in a month.”



“So what are you saying? You want us to shut down for a month?”



“Nope. I'm saying we stay at two thirds occupancy, so that means we schedule hotels to be shut and we get them redone and moved into for the others to be done. I suggest we go shut in February of next year and we have it done by April. It gives us a year where it should only take six months, but now, I'm going to give you the next big wish on the wish list that's more like a demand.”



He smiled, “Thanks Dad!”



“I loved that man, but yeah, he taught me well! What I'm going to do is I'm going to ask you think about three more sisters and let me have the Ginosaur be twelve stories instead of six.”



“That's a helluva lot more rooms!”



“Yeah, and there's a plan there. Right now, without extensive advertising, we're keeping two thirds occupancy.”



“Yeah, but there's a limit there. The more rooms, the lower the occupancy.”



“Show me those numbers. You've got to prove to me the numbers were one hundred and then, you've got to show me how they lowered down as we added hotels. I'll tell you with three, the most we ever had was ninety one and it's average was two thirds.

Sam's telling me we stay at two thirds, so that's two thirds. So, in my mind, that's two thirds with three and two thirds with seven, so if you have added rooms, you've got more rooms and two thirds of them full. Add in the Ginosaur and you've got another eight thousand rooms.”



“You're lost there.”



“Tell me how?”



“Where did you come up with the numbers because it's half the number I've gotten.”



“Let's crunch. You've got four miles at fifty two eighty feet divided by thirty two times six floors.”



“Yeah, and double that.”



“How?”



“You've got two sides to a floor Rhette! You're only doing one!”



“Oh! So we're going to add sixteen thousand suites and another twenty one hundred rooms.”



He smiled, “You're conditioning me to ok those three hotels. Why?”



“Ginorocity is ten letters long. I want letters thirty feet tall on top of them which airplane passengers will see saying, “My God! What the hell is that?! When they can read it, it's very evident who we are and it's really plain to see for anyone who is driving towards us we're here.”



“It's too much.”



“We own the land. Let's do it now and get that known we're the biggest. No, we're not the fanciest, but when I slap the marketing blitz out there and when you see me doing things you're going to see the two thirds climb to about eighty percent.”



“How?”



“Right now, we're word of mouth. We spent how much on advertising last year?”



“I don't know.”



“I'll tell you it wasn't much. I'll also tell you a Superbowl ad this year cost three million for thirty seconds and six for a minute. Now, let's take you into my advertising blitz so you can see it.”



“Ok”



“What I'm going to do is I'm going to play Donald Trump for a moment and be the promoter you hate.”



“You're not kidding there!”



“But tear a page out of his book for a moment and listen to me. If you are shown a hotel room, you go...”Ok, I've seen a thousand like them before...right?”



“Yeah.”



“Now, interrupt that mental picture by me coming in and ripping that room to shreds inspecting it with white gloves where I look and showing them it's clean. Suddenly, you're looking at a room differently because you're going 'OH! I never thought about looking there, there, or there for cleanliness!'

Now, suddenly, you're looking around your house and you're going in behind the curtains and looking on the window sills and you see dust. You look behind the toilet and you see grunge. You look around your nightstand and see dust. You look on top of the clothes rack and you see dust.

When you see where we inspect and you see we clean ours, suddenly you're seeing us in a whole new light and when you're one of the hundred and ninety thousand people in motel rooms at any given time, you're looking there and you're seeing filth.

Now, who are you going to think of when I show our prices on national television and guaranty those rates day in and day out?”



He smiled



“Dave, one percentage point for us right now in increased occupancy is ten million a year. If we double the number of rooms and if we increase the numbers that's twenty million a year for one point and if I get you five points, that's a hundred million. In ten years, I've got the billion, but when word gets out we're as good as we advertise we are, suddenly those numbers go up, stay up, and increase when word gets out to all those friends and family back home.”



“Really?”



“Think about this. That's the cleanliness factor. How many people do we keep on staff who are paramedic first responders?”



“I don't know.”



“Let me tell you what a place this big needs. It needs a medical staff for emergencies. We're in one of the most stressful environments and we need to have a staff of ten. We need those defib units, and we need people there so when the heart attack happens, we're shown saving people.

Now, let me have those ten people at thirty or forty grand a year and I'll advertise it on the Superbowl. When I show them and ask, “Does your hotel have medical staff there to save your life? And what's the number you call to reach them? What do you think they're going to do? You're going to think about it and say, “Wow, the place thinks of our needs and I never thought of it!

But, when I'm in the kitchen in the next commercial showing how we cook and make our own sauces and how to tell real from fake when you're eating and that our buffets are $3.99 day in and day out, you're getting hungry, you're seeing our quality going in, and you're looking at us in a whole new light.

Once again, I'm going to be down on that parking lot showing it behind me as the behemoth it is, but then I'll be up on top next to the letter with a mic on and them down at that same spot with an arrow pointing at me showing how big it is again.

That's when I'm going to say, “At Ginorocity, there's always room for you...and if we fill our twelve thousand or whatever rooms, we'll pay for your entire vacation including all the gambling you ever should desire at that high roller suite down the street at our expense.”



“What?!”



“Do you know what happened when Disney advertised you'd get in free for your birthday? They went. When Denny's advertised free meals? They went. If I advertise we'll give them free when we fill, you best believe they're going to book with us hoping we go full to get the best down the street and if it increases our numbers, it fills our theaters, it fills the casinos, it fills the restaurants, and we're making money. I'll pay that price because when I do, I'm going to shove a camera in their faces asking them if I didn't keep my word and using it as the next damned commercial.”



He laughed, “You better!”



“What I want you to know is I'm ready to step up and be the name on the place. Yeah, I'm Rhette Michaels and I hold stock in it as far as they're concerned, but I'll be paid the fee and from outward appearances, I'm nothing but a gimmicy spokesperson. They don't know I'm standing there in my showgirl costume or my French maid costume really owning the thing, but they see what they want to see.”



“So what do we do?”



“We get the Ginosaur built. I spoke with Sal and he's guaranteeing our concrete at seventy five a yard.”



“How the hell did you get that?!”



“I told him I'm not paying eight billion for a hotel and that I'd shelve it instead. I told him he could keep up his morale with his unions by having his guys working if they'd get it built. When I told him the man was raping us, he asked what I'd be willing to pay and I told him. He said he'd get it.”



“Oh man!”



“So lets build all we can while we can and smile about it when everyone else is blown away we suddenly went so damned big and there's just no way they can compete.”



“How much do you want us to budget for everything?”



“Don't ask me that!”



“Why not?!”



“What would your Dad say?”



“Oh damn!”



“Yeah, as much as it takes. Get it done and get it done right.”



He smiled, “You were a damned good student. I really wish you'd not listened so well.”



“Bullshit, had I not, you'd know I didn't love him. Instead, you know I listened not only because I love him, but because that dude was sexy as hell and he loved to smile and teach me things. Because he loved me, I learned.”



I looked away because the tears stung my eyes. Before I knew it, he was over hugging me. “Rhette, I never said you didn't love him.”



“I don't ever want you to doubt it. It wasn't because I didn't love him.”



“I know.”



He put my chin in his fingers and turned my head to face him. “You know, there are times like now I see what he saw in you and love you all the more for it. It scares me because right now, I could pick you up and carry you into that bedroom and make love with you and know it'd be real, but what's scaring me is what tomorrow would bring. And, what scares me is I know he loved you and did all this so we'd complete the other in the deals like you wrote.”



“But you don't understand Dave. When you think about us completing each other, think about the load he carried. You carry it most of the time and we struggle under it. And when you think about how it must've looked to him by me asking him to let it go and replace it with me, I had to look really small to him and he had to know it was that damned big. Why he didn't just say it? I don't know, but he didn't. Maybe I would've understood, but I sure understand now.”



He smiled, “That was the best turn down ever.”



“Were you serious?!”



He laughed, “Maybe it's the moment and me knowing how much you loved him and wanting to be loved like that.”



“Then ask Sam out. That girl is the best one ever. Do you realize if I were straight, she'd be the top pick?”



“Really?!”



“And she knows it.”



I heard from behind him. “Yeah, I know it.”



Dave chuckled, “And now she thinks I'm hardly straight!”



I looked over her shoulder, “Sam, he's my step son in all ways except marriage. I love him and I was just trying to convince him he should ask you out. So, without his shyness, I'll ask you out for him. That way, you two can have a sighted date.”



She laughed, “In that case, I'll accept.”



I scolded, “Now Dave, was that so hard?”



He stood up and blushed, “Sam, he's a hopeless romantic.”



She chuckled, “And that's what I like about him. He played me those songs he wrote and captured me more...if he were straight.”



He smiled, “Lucky little shit.”



“You're the lucky one Dave! You get a chance where she and I would only compare dresses in the bedroom!”



Everyone laughed. Sam said, “Here are the catalogues.”



I took the IGT and said, “Dave, before you look at any others, we're looking at these.”



I started looking and the catalog and asked, “Sam, does the casino here have a laptop? It says we can order directly from them using our gaming license. We can go ahead and order these.”



She nodded, “I can get one.”



“We need to know the maximum number of slots the floors will hold of each.”



She nodded, “I'll get you the information.”


She left and Dave said, “Rhette, that's a helluva lot of money.”



“You're forgetting something. We don't need to have everything here upstairs to remodel downstairs and once these machines are installed, it's going to pay for the upstairs.”



“How?”



“Ok, the economy is tough. I'll tell you now we don't have the high rollers the other guys have. We're a family casino instead of a glitzy one.

Yeah, there are seven of them down there and soon to be ten, but what we've got in gaming floor is the largest in the world.

I see no point in having five, ten, twenty, and higher slots if we're going for the maximum payout for our floor space.

What you see here are penny slots. They're called penny slots because they're capable of being down to one penny, however, if you look that one there goes up to ninety cents, that one there is forty five, that one is a buck fifty.

What you get there is psychology. Let's say you're interested in paying eighteen cents. You can and lets say you play it and it's not hitting. Before you get off, you're going to see if the nine and the twenty seven is paying. I'll tell you we can program them so the twenty seven is paying more than the others. I'll also tell you that ninety can be programmed to pay higher on the same machine.

So, you stay on and you're not going to a quarter slot. You're feeding us two cents extra and in fifty turns of the reels, you've paid us a dollar instead of what you'd normally played. Yeah, we're showing you a good time, but look at the percentages and you see we're able to pull in more.

I'll tell you the first month we're full of new machines in a casino, I'm going to have those machines set to pay artificially high. It's a draw and it stays full. I'll also tell you I'm going to get this place paid more than it's ever been paid and that's in good and bad.

What you don't realize is spacing is everything. There's a reason those machines are set on center and those bases are all a certain width. That's because an ashtray fits between and I'll tell you those machines coming out are smart.”



“How so?”



“Ok, there are sensors all over these fuckers. They can sense when your fingers are on that payout button. When that happens, that reel is going to give you three shots of artificially high to entice you to stay. I'll tell you the trays down there have sensors telling it when someone's knees are against it. Why? Because if your knees are touching the damned thing, you're relaxed and it's going into regular play instead of artificially high.

It'll also sense when your fingers are on the max button instead of the bet one button. Do that for ten in a row and that thing kicks down into regular pay instead of artificially high. It knows you're a high roller on the slots instead of the regular Mom and Pop.

A lot of the machines we've got down there are older. As you can see, there are options galore on these and I'll tell you to go with banks at angles instead of block set. What that does in a casino is gets you maximum eye catch when someone's walking down the aisle. They see the top hats and they see the plasmas up above if someone's hit the progressive or not.

What I'll tell you if you're an experienced player is when you walk in, you're going to look for top hats lit up showing a jackpot's being won. If you're smart, you're counting them and if it's eight or higher on a floor our size, you're going in and you're not moving on.”



“Why?”



“Because an experienced player knows top hats lit means artificially high is on. He smiles because he knows his chances are better.”



“Ok”



“It's psychology Dave. Colors make everything and I'm going to tell you Gold used to be the color which got people in on the floors. That's why everything is Gold...the wallpaper, the carpet, and all the brass.

I will also tell you in troubled economies, people don't give a shit about the gold. They want green and they want the cash. We've got to get plenty of green on green on green.

We can keep the brass, but that wall paper has to be green and it needs to be what looks like cash falling in flight. I will also tell you I'm going to throw so many things at them, they're going to be fucked mentally as soon as they enter.”



“We've got people who do that.”



“Yup, and they're really paying us by not telling you the truth. Where are the gold things hanging from the ceiling signifying pennies from Heaven? Where are the orders from you telling them what they've been delivering just aren't cutting it. Fire them, and let's use my brain. I'm in touch with what's happening out there in America and they're just out of touch.”



“Ok, tell me what you think?”



“Greenery. I don't want palm trees. I want live plants. It says health and prosperity because we're able to keep them alive. They don't know we've got grow spots on them, all they see is the symbolism.

What I'm also going to say is this. Those bases being wood tone are going.

What isn't green and gold down there needs to show prosperity and it needs to show the customer we're showing tasteful prosperity instead of glitz they get down the street. Do you realize what a base costs and what it's sole purpose is?”



“No.”



“It's a base to hold it up off the floor and get it to user friendly height. That's it now. They used to hold coins, but with us going to the cashless, tokenless systems, we got rid of that need. So, why have bases with doors in them and why not totally rethinking the system instead of just doing what everyone else is doing?”



“What's that mean?”



“I can buy these machines here and put them on the bases. Whoohoo, I spent some bucks and yeah, I'm going to get you profits. HOWEVER, I can go with these bar top models and put them in bar high stands which get the player up higher. What did that do?”



“I don't know.”



“Ok, let's go to the floor. I need to show you what's going on down there.”



“Sam's on her way back up.”



I smiled, “Yeah, and you thought of her dude!”



He smiled, “She is a cute kid.”



“She's a cute woman who has feelings and happens to be the nicest person I know. She's that person who would be a great Mom and probably read bedtime stories and give kisses after prayers. She's the one who will embrace the life we lead and she's going to relish in learning the history in order to tell it to her kids with you.

If you don't think about that, she's a nice kid.”



“Sell it a little harder Rhette.”



“I'm coming at you from your Dad's perspective and Mee-maw's perspective. Do you know what your Dad would tell you?”



“What?”



“Dave, you're wasting your life. Mee-maw wouldn't even waste the words, she'd just shake her head and occasionally, she'd ask you if there were any illegitimate ones out there she could claim since you're constipated and just sitting there.”



He laughed, “Oh man!”



“You know she was nicer than all of us and if you don't see Sam as your grandma out of a dress and in pants, you better look again because I see Sam as someone who's going to age classy and she's going to be an adornment to make you proud. When she gets to seventy, she's going to turn your head still and probably still rock your world in that bedroom. Don't underestimate her because I see it in her eyes.”



“I've not paid attention to her.”



“You're not paying attention to your own future either. You're hitting an age where your kids are going to start being asked if you're their grandpa at school. Grecian formula better be your buddy because I know a plastic surgeon who'll take care of the rest.”



He chuckled, “And that was Rhette speaking!”



“Yeah, because your Dad didn't need it. He had those looks which just got respect and he had the voice which comes once in a lifetime.”



“I wonder why I never got that voice.”



“You didn't need it. He had to command respect when he raised his and he had to be heard when he was booming.

Look at that man on Days of Our Lives who plays Steffano DiMira. That man could play the part of your Dad perfectly because he's got the size, look, and the voice. He's not as sexy as your Dad was, but he's not letting his hair go gray either. I'll tell you your Dad was hot.”



“Why is it you don't go for those types now?”



“Kevin was the largest guy I've been with since. Your Dad didn't swoop me off my feet. He was himself. He showed me he was the same day in and day out and what he used to get me off my feet were heart strings and yes, I'll gladly say I was his puppet, but I had needs too.”



“And he knew you adored him.”



“Yeah I did, but there was a time there when he adored me too. I knew it and he told me I made him feel more alive than anyone. I believe that because his eyes told me.”



“He told me that too. He didn't ever stop loving you.”



“I know he didn't. I still love him even though he's not with us. If he was, life would be a whole lot different.”



“How would it be different for you?”



“I wouldn't be so demanding and I wouldn't be subconsciously thinking I've got to cherish every damned moment like it was my last. That's what that beating gave me...not prison and not anything else.

What's bad is while I was laying there feeling sorry for myself in that bed, Kevin got judged next to your Dad so often, he lost. I know your Dad wouldn't've been anywhere else and I know he'd held my hand so much we'd been fused together. He certainly would've made sure those who were responsible would've paid.”



“Do you think I let you down on that?”



“No. And that's one thing I had to decide laying there. I'm the one who doesn't want the protection and I'm the one who believes in living under surveillance. No, it's not going to stop anyone from doing anything, but it certainly affords me owning a convertible and being able to do what I want. It also gets you the capability of finding out who did it and getting those people caught if it should ever happen again.”



“The one on your car has made me rethink things with the ease you were able to prove something was done.”



Sam came in smiling. I said, “Hon, there's a change in plans. We've got to go to the floor to have me show him what I want and for you to understand how things are going to change.”



“Ok.”



We went down to the floor and I said, “Dave, look at the backs of the chairs and count how many people are using them versus bent over and slouching.”



“Oh!”



“Yeah, a lot of them.”



I said, “Sam, call and find out what are spacing is here between the banks.”



“I can tell you it's seven feet.”



“Yup, and fire code tells us we can have x amount on this floor but we've got to have y amount between the chairs to make an aisle and x always is way higher than y, right?”



She smiled, “Yeah.”



“Ok, here's how x gets to be way bigger, let's go over here to the bar so I can make the point I want and then, I'm going to tell you how this place is going to change.”



We went over to the bar and I said, “Dave, these are the bar mounts. You drop a machine in the bar at an angle and you've got someone capable of slipping a bar stool up under and having bar area to set drinks on and be more comfortable with the ashtray. In short, they took what makes a console model better than an upright, and used it.”



Dave nodded, “Ok, what are you wanting?”



I want bars out here with higher stools. With the knees under the bars, those stools aren't out in the aisles as far and those machines can be closer together. Fire code gets met, but people are more comfortable.

Let's concentrate on the user experience instead of the casino experience. More machines on the floor gets more variety and a whole different look gets us known to be apart from all the rest.”



Sam nodded, “That would work!”



“I was telling him bases are outdated. All they're used for now are uprights being held up to user height instead of the coin bags underneath.”


I turned and said, “Dave, what I want is us looking at a bar which is Corian marble with lighting lit under. They hold these bar models in them and yeah, we can have our uprights up high and all the banners you'd want. It makes the floor appear bigger and because we're going with a darker wall paper, with the greenery, it's going to make those walls appear further apart.

Out here on the floor, I'm going to tell you to do away with the carpet. I'll tell you the carpet was used to absorb sound, but with speakers being in the machines and us capable of using noise cancelling technology, we don't need it anymore.”



Sam smiled really big. “That's going to be nice!”



“What you don't realize Sam is I'm going for a desert oasis feel. Greenery, sandy colored beige on the floor and out here, we're going ot have a waterfall which just gets us accolades for design because it's going to filter the air, cool it, and give us noise cancelling. People are drawn to water to touch and I'm going to tell you we're going to have that waterfall being in the shape of a volcano and it's going to not just be all that, but it's going to be the turnstile for the Ginorocity's own progressive.

There will be machines embedded in the thing and we'll have twenty machines around it with that water up top misting on a glistening plasma which is behind mylar showing the numbers through.”



Dave looked surprised, “How?”



“The Mylar protects the plasma. Water can hit it and that mylar can be a silver blue to look like water. With the water misting up on it, it's going to catch that color reflected through and be that color. So, what you've got is white water going up in a mist changing to that silver blue.

Now, of course we're going to have lots of greenery and it's going to be sharp, but what you don't know is I can play games with people's head like the best of them and you certainly know I will.”



“How?”



“Under the water, you've got rocks. They're deep brown, but those aren't rocks, they're foam and they've got LEDs embedded so you see flickers of gold prisming out and looking like it's d'oro of the riches just there for the taking. You best believe I'll have fools gold in that foam also and it's going to make people think we've just went nuts.”



Dave said, “I like it. I can imagine it.”



“Now, let's get to technicals and details. I want the ceiling painted deep blue with LEDs up there twinkling. I want that to look like the stars and us to be soothing in here.

Those cash pavillions need to be made in that same marble looking like they're a column. I want them to be slick to the touch and I want them to house the hospitality centers also.”



“What do you want in them?”



“Put the coffees, the sodas, and get juices. Get us flavored coffees and get us creamer which is liquid. Yeah, it costs more, but it's not powder all over the place and it's not little wrappers strewn about. On the end, you can have an ATM and on the other end, you can have the cash machine. You've got an eight foot long station done in a triangular piece.”



“Ok, you lost me. I was thinking oblong.”



“Here's why I want triangular. Come over here.”



We went over and I said, “Ok, you've got an aisle. Right?”



“Yeah.”



“Station goes here. It puts you thinking angular and it gets all these at angles. The angles gets you more visibility as I said and it'll probably get you more machines in a row.

At the end of the rows, I want us to rethink the trash can and the cigarette urns. Have a trash can below with the butt urn being black gravel and then, have the greenery going up. Yeah, it's going to block the eyes, but if you ask Sam here and anyone else, all the eyes are used for now are machine damage and jackpot verification. Most of the time the jackpot verification is done on a server in the back and easily proven.”



She nodded.



“What I'm going to tell you now is one thing you're going to hate my guts for but we're going to cut through some bull with these machines.

There are instances when these machines show triple triple triple and it just didn't quite get there to pay them. They throw a fit and I don't blame them because it sure looks like we fucked them.

I'm going to tell you when they complain, you send out management and you pay that person in green cash that amount. You tell the management to put showmanship into it and you have them count that shit as loud and full of bravado as they can. I want notice being given we're paying them even though it didn't register. Then, you put that account on a tally. At the end of the year, we're writing that off as 'other losses'.”



Sam smiled and said, “And a customer who's happy breaths a sigh of relief and puts the money back in a machine whereas the other guy goes out the door cussing.”



Dave nodded, “Ok, once again, we'll be different.”



“It's little moves to gain them Dave. When you've demonstrated you're moving a little, they move a lot. When you show them new, they come and plunk down bucks.

Now, let's go to table games because I bet you I'm going to tell you we've got cheaters and I'm going to tell you we've got games which shouldn't be in the place.”



I turned to Sam and asked, “Get us our boss standing at the ready because I'm going to issue a directive which is going to help here.”



We went in and I pointed. “Call security. We're about to pull a bunch of people out of here.”



Dave looked alarmed, “What's going on?”



“We're being fleeced.”



I went over to the table and climbed upon it. “Ladies and gentlemen, until we handle some issues, the dice tables are now shut. You're welcome to mill around until we get things resolved, but I do need to ask you to make this play your last for a moment.”



Grumbling was heard and security got there.



“Ladies and Gentlemen, all of you with flannel jackets are welcome to check your jackets at coat check, but from this moment further, you will never be allowed to use them in our casino again. Please feel free to go to our competition and rob them and please feel free to sue me for calling you a thief, but I'll demonstrate in court what static cling does to dice and I'll certainly prove you're cheating.

Security, get the name of everyone with a jacket on made of flannel and ban them from the Ginos. Tell them if they wish to try it here again, you tell them we'll proudly announce they're banned from any casino in Nevada when we take them to the gaming board.”



Dave was looking stunned.



“For those of you who think I don't have the balls to do it, my name is Rhette Michaels and I cut my teeth as a teenager using the gimmic they're pulling and probably brought in a hundred grand a year easily using the method they're using.

I'll call them a thief, I'll ban them from my casino, I'll get them banned from playing in Nevada, and if they think they can get it in here again, I'll have them arrested out of here every time. If that doesn't tell you who I am, you best know I'll protect my gaming licenses to the enth degree.”



I stepped over to the side of the table. “For all of you who think you can play honestly, you're welcome to play. I've just evened your odds.”



With the mass exodus, there were four players left. All of them were smiling and nodding.



Dave said, “You just single handedly got rid of a bunch of players.”



“Think about it. How'd your grandpa built his racket in New York? Do you know? It was those jackets. I did it in East St. Louis and even Anna wanted to know how I wasn't killed.

It's because you can't prove what you can't see...static cling can kill us here. The tables are felt and the jackets are also. They rub the dice and they get that bit of charge which is like sticking magnets to those numbers. They hit the back board and go out and stick. You lose money and I'll proudly announce I've put them out the door and don't give a fuck if gaming wants to call me.”



“They probably will.”



“They've got to prove they're not cheating. Tell security once they've gotten through all these people, you get to the others. From here on out, rubbing dice on one's jacket is out. It's not luck, it's cheating.”



Sam nodded and told the boss, “Go tell your pit bosses it goes for cards and all table games. He's got the point made and now we're going to make changes.”



I turned to Dave, “Call up and ask the eyes to tell us how much they took. If you think they were winning legit, you'll see the tables are probably way down.”



I told the boss, “I want staff hired. We're going to get the ballroom outfitted with hold'em tables and we're going to start tournaments.”



I told Dave, “Tell management we want enough room for a thousand people seated. Tell them it's a ten dollar tournament and drinks and hospitality are complimentary. We'll do closed tourneys and we'll have it be so we see eighteen hundred dollars a round. All the rest gets paid out.

You tell them to stack that eighteen hundred dollars and you keep the total of who is the winner of each round. It's a progressive and when we've got the thousand people seated, we're going to have a million dollar guaranteed tournament which means that's after taxes.

It's winner takes all and that tournament has no substitutions and only one player gets seated. If he wins multiple at the little ones, it doesn't mean seats go empty at the big one. We'll play three thousand of the things if we need to in order to get the number to be a thousand.”



“How do you want the tables?”



“Five to a table. It's quicker and it knocks people out faster than nine. We have to rearrange quicker, but their eye is on that prize or the million, not on their inconvenience.”



The boss asked, “How often do you want to hold them?”



“I want you live on the P.A. Announcing when it filled and the players have twenty minutes from that announcement to get here. We do NOT call people's homes and we do NOT reserve for anyone. If they're here, they play. If they're not, they forfeit the ten bucks to that winner.”



He nodded, “It's going to liven things up around here.”



“And it's going to make people more aware we're in gaming, not just slots.

What I will tell you is you're going to be asked if we're going to have bigger grand prizes. You tell them when we get tables seated of those winners, we'll have the hundred million dollar tourney. I'll tell you now, it'll never happen.

Just the same, you put the names on a list because if we get enough to seat one, I'll squeeze the money out of my tight ass to pay up.”



He smiled, “Ok”



Sam chuckled, “Rhette, someone over there is staring at you like you wouldn't believe.”



I turned and yelled, “Tommy!”



He smiled and I ran over to hug him. “How in the hell are you?!”



“I didn't know if it was you, or not.”



“How's my best lookin' cousin in Vegas!”



He smiled, “Fine.”



“What'cha doin' with yourself?”



“You know how it is, modelin', stunt work, and construction...”



“Keeps you hunky lookin', tanned, and just too damned good lookin' for me to stand next to. Come on, let's go sit down.”



“Who's the babe you were talking with?”



“Dave?”



He laughed, “No, the girl.”



“Sam. She's dating Dave and is the Slots manager here.”



“Oh.”



“Single again?”



“Nah, datin' rosey rather heavily.” he smiled.



“Damn, let's see what I can do to change it. I'm thinkin' here and the only person I can think of who's single isn't in Nevada. She's in South Carolina, but she's an ideal girl.”



“Too far away.”



“Are you workin' construction now?”



“Got laid off today. I was workin' here.”



“You'll be called back tomorrow. We're going to rethink things and get three more sisters up plus the Ginosaur.”



“What's the Ginosaur?”



“It's my pet name for the 'four mile project'. We pulled everyone because we're ordering design changes.”



“Really?”



“Well, consider your cousin an ignorant idiot, but somehow, I pulled the plug thinking we were only building four thousand rooms. It wasn't until after I said I wanted it twelve stories instead of six Dave told me my numbers were off.”



He smiled, and I heard Dave's voice, “Care to introduce everyone?”



“Dave, Sam, this is my cousin Tommy. Tommy, this is Sam and Dave. Dave is my arms, legs, eyes, and about every other useful part in this business...not just my right hand.

Sam there is from back home and she's our slots manager ala my main pick for a lot more in the future...if Dave will listen!”



Dave smiled, “Sam, I might as well pop the question and get us to a chapel. He's not going to give up until he's got me having a baby.”



She laughed, “Is he getting you that way?!”



I laughed, “In his dreams. If it happened, I'd have him ruined for women!”



She laughed and Dave blushed. I said, “Dave, go get the limo. She didn't give opposition to the marriage part of that.”



She laughed and said, “Dating first, then marriage, then we'll see who comes walking with the baby carriage.”



“Dave's not going to walk. I'll tell you that now. He'll have the kid floating on cloud nine with how happy he'll be.”



Dave smiled and I saw Sam give him a little glance.



I said, “Guys, let Tommy and I catch up. Business for me is done. Family comes first and as you know, I'm going to pay attention to the ones who don't look like mongoloids.”



Sam laughed, “You're terrible!”



“Hey, he never got to be back there with that inbreeding bunch! His Mom was smart enough to get out and get some fresh dna!”



Tommy laughed, “You are so in trouble and you know it.”



“I love 'em, don't get me wrong, but you know how they are.”



He nodded, “Yeah, it's a bit much.”



Dave patted my shoulder, “We're going on a walk. I imagine you are too. We'll wave if we see you.”



I asked Tommy, “Do you have some time?”



“Sure.”



“Good, let's go for a hike. You've got good walking shoes on, so I'll show you what it's like to be me out here.”



We got up and went out. He said, “I heard about the hold'em tournaments. They're popular.”



“We're going for a complete rehab and remodel. Dave's not given the green light on the three sisters being added, but I know he will since I got costs back down.”



“How'd you do that?”



“Someone here has concrete outrageously high. It used to be forty a yard and now it's a hundred dollars higher.”



“Yeah.”



“Well, it took a phone call, but that man is now going to sell us concrete at seventy five a yard, or we'll start our own batch plant and contest the bad calls by the inspectors out the ass all the way to the state with our own inspectors, structural engineers, and safety people.”



“Let' me make a call. You don't know who the guy is, but the moment you hear his voice, you'll hear that sound of the price going down.”



“Really? If you can, it's worth a million dollars tax free to you.”



He smiled, “Rhette, let me call and you speak with him.”



He dialed his cell phone and said, “Yeah, it's me. I've got Rhette here and he tells me you're jacking him on the price of the Ginorocity projects.”



He was silent and asked, “Is that so?! The main guy from New York? Well damn! What'd you tell him?! I bet! Well, you talk to Rhette. You don't know it, but he owns the Ginorocity. No, I didn't know it either, but then I see his little ass climbing up on a dice table throwing all of them out! Yeah, he's not changed much. His looks have changed, but he's still little. Yeah, well, here, you talk with him.”



He handed me the phone and I said, “Hello?”



“Well I'll be dayamned!”


With those words, I heard my cousin Robbie's unmistakable voice.



“Robbie?!”



“Robert...no one calls me Robbie no more.”



“Or less. What the hell are you doing?”



“Trying to make money, but with you calling in mafia, I'm having to give the shit away!”



“So you're the one who decided to give me a fuckin', huh?”



“I didn't know it was you. Someone else called me about it and he said it was his.”



“That's Dave. He's my manager.”



“Where the hell are you at?”



“Here in the city. We're about to walk the four mile project. I call it the Ginosaur.”



“I'll be right there.”



“We'll be here.”



He hung up and I smiled, “Oh man, if there's one guy on the face of the planet better looking than you, it's him.”



“Don't say that too loud. He's got a big enough head already.”



“At least I can say it's in our genes.”



“Yours ain't grown much.”



“Yours has. Did you hear my Mom carry on about you at my Dad's funeral? I think she had a case of the lust.”



He laughed, “She sure carried on. It was almost embarrassing.”



“Almost...you were eating it up.”



“Your Mom's a babe still. How's Jilli?”



“She's doing great. She's doing her show and doing well.”



“I see she's got a show.”



“She's doing great. I saw her at Christmas and we got reconnected.”



“What was the matter?”



“It was a bunch of bullshit really. You know how it is, I ran out to California to rescue her from a guy who chose to knock her around and when I got there, she met me at the airport saying she decided to take him back. I got pissed and she got hurt feelings, so we didn't speak for six years. Between that, and me being away for eight and a half before that in prison, it was a long time.”



“Man!”



“So, out of the blue, she called and asked to come to South Carolina to see me. She flew in and we had a great week. Then, we drove home together and had a great Christmas as Mom's. Now we're reconnected and she likes my fame and I like hers.”



“Yours isn't as well known as hers.”



“You don't know about the writing I'm doing. When I saw your Mom last, I told her and she was reading me on the web.”



“The gay romances?!”



“Yeah.”



“Believe it or not, I read all of them. She left the page up and I sat down and started reading. I didn't know that was you!”



“Yeah, but now it's going to be something new. Here, take a listen and tell me what you think.”



I put on “You Can't Do That” and he listened. He was getting into it and said, “Who is she? I like it! She sounds like a babe!”



“She is. Now, do you want to see the video of that song?”



“Yeah.”



I put it on and he watched, “Oh man! Who's the guy? She's a knockout!”



“Would you kiss her there?”



“Would I?! I'd probably rip 'em down and dive on it!”



I said, “Don't say that unless you mean it. I opened my pants and showed him the thong. Those shots were done this morning in New York.”



“That's you!”



“Yee-ahh, still wanna dive on it?!”



“Dude! You're a knock out as a chick! Is that you singing?!”



“Yeah. In order to sell it, I've got to do it in drag.”



“If you look like that, everyone's going to want you!”



“Even my own blood!” I said chuckling.



“Don't say anything to Robbie and let him watch that. I bet you he's worse than I was.”



“Here's the next one. Be ready to get emotional.”



I put on 'Baby', and he heard the first verse and said, “Oh man.”



When the end of the song happened, he handed my phone to me and walked off. I saw his shoulders heaving and went up to hug him from behind. “Hon, everyone who's heard it gets the same way.”



He turned around and hugged me, “My divorce. That's how I felt. She was on the drugs and doing them in front of the kids. I knew she had to go because she was selling everything. I caught her trying to sell my kids! That's when she went out the door. All this time, I've loved her, but I can't have her in our lives.”



“Tommy, you did the best for you and the situation. That kid I was in that video with wants me something fierce. He's the son of an ex I had in high school. I slept with him two nights not making out with him and pulled myself out of bed and wrote that. As I wrote it, I thought of all the times I've said I'm sorry to people and it got put into the song.”



He hugged me closer and said, “Why is it we can't find people?”



“Because we're too busy looking under rocks kissing toads and thinking we're going to find them.”



I heard Robbie's voice behind me. “Godayamned Get A Roooom! You own enough!”



“It's my property, you get a room and watch!”



I turned around and hugged him. “No, seriously, watch this video on my phone and tell me what you think.”



I pressed play and he began watching, “Son of a beeatch! Who's the chick!”



“Watch it, it gets better.”



He watched and said, “I want the song. It's blastin'. I've never heard of her.”



“It's her singing.”



“Really?!”



Tommy chuckled and said, “Yeah, there's another song on there she sang which made me bawl.”



“You're a big old pussy.”



When it was over, I put 'Baby' on and said, “Give it back to me when you're done. We'll be up here walking.”



Tommy said, “Rhette, we're not leaving him. He'll be worse than me.”



He hung next to Robby and in the second verse, Robbie was on his knees. “Oh man!”



The song continued to play and by the time it was over, he was in a fetal position crying. “Oh God! Oh God!”



Tommy sat him up and said, “Robbie, what are you thinking?”



“It's bad. That damned song. It just hits me with how I feel.”



“Rhette didn't know. It hit me hard and when I heard why he wrote it, it's an altogether different reason to him.”



“He wrote it!”



He looked at me and said, “You wrote that!”



“And sang them.”



“What?!”



“Yeah.”



“You sang that like that?!”



“Yeah.”



“God damned, who's the girl?”



“Me.”



“REALLY!”



“Yeah.”



“You son of a bitch! You had me fooled! Here I am wanting her and you're there laughing your ass off at me!”



“No, I'm not laughin' Rob. I know I have that affect on guys when I dress in drag. I could show you a lot more videos and you'd see different looks and you'd see yourself wanting all of them.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah. Now, let's get you guys laughing with this song and we'll forget the sadness.”



Robbie said, “Let me talk for a moment. I want you knowing how I received that song.”



“Ok”



I sat down on the gravel next to him.



“You don't know, but my two oldest were killed in a car wreck six years ago. Before they left that night, I saw something hanging on my son's car. I looked, but because it was dark, I couldn't see anything. Rather than telling him to take mine, I told him we'd look at it in the morning. Not twenty minutes later, they were dead!”



“Oh man!” I hugged him and he held onto me really tight. He cried and said, “If I'd known Rhette! If I'd known, I'd not sent them off to die!”



He cried and Tommy held us together. Robbie looked up and said, “Tommy's been great. He's been there and he's helped me. My marriage fell apart. My other kids now hate me. And all because I was too damned dumb to let them go!”



“Robbie. Let's sit here and talk. Tommy, sit down.”



My voice hit authoritative and I said, “Let me tell you something up front. First of all, I wrote the song because I've got that guy in that video wanting me something fierce.

You've never approved of me being gay, but we're at a stage in our lives, I'm not apologizing for a damned thing I'm doing to anyone...including you.

I'm not pointing fingers and I'm not saying names, but you have the capacity to love in your heart as do I. You've known loss as I have.

All you see around you was Willed to me by a former lover. Gino Camiletti. It was given out of love and that's that. He died and he died knowing I loved him but I wasn't there because I was in prison.

As I said, that boy wants me, and everyone who's seen us sees the love he has for me, but I run from it. The reason I'm running is stupid, I know, but it's because his Dad and I were lovers in high school.

You might not be able to tell, but he's really thin because he was on crack. I rescued him and now, we're getting him a career.

Two nights before I wrote that song, I went to bed with him and just held him. I nuzzled in his hair and WANTED him something awful, but because of all the past relationships I've been in which've went bad, I put him at a distance.

After getting out of bed and leaving him, I went down and wrote those first words. I put them down to that melody and then cried. Then, I thought of all the times I've said I'm sorry...and...it killed me because I...can't bring back what's happened.”



Tears stung my eyes and Robbie hugged me.



“When I was done, I was drained. I wrote 'You Can't Do That To Me' because it's a tease. I'm telling him he can't do it, and yet, if he started, he'd be able to do it because I want him.

Everyone who's listened to it has bawled. Earlier we were in South Carolina and I performed it in a bar. I'll tell you they were all crying and the guys were crying just as hard as the chicks. That's when this song got wrote because the mood needed lightened. So, listen to it and realize it's comedy.”



I played 'One' for them and as they listened, they laughed. And as they listened to more, they laughed harder. When it was over, Robbie was chuckling, “That's funny!”



“Rob, let me tell you something. I'm not making you do anything, you don't want, but when I went to college, I went for mortuary science. In that training, I've got enough hours of psychology to be a counselor. The school I went to believed Grief Therapy is a leading thing saving people when the crisis of death hits people.

Let me give you an example. When I was in school, the last three funerals I directed were three brothers. They went ice skating on their pond and fell through. They drowned and I'll tell you the deaths broadsided that family.

The Mom was at home. She blamed herself because she thinks in the house damned near a half mile away, she should've been able to hear her kids screaming for help.

I'll tell you I went there and couldn't hear the Coroner a hundred feet away, so she sure wasn't going to hear them and who's to say they yelled? I know when you're plunged into icy water, shock happens within seconds.

What happened, was the funeral was a mess. You've got parents wanting to climb into their kid's caskets, the caskets falling over, and it's just hell. Finally, I had to be a complete asshole and demand they stay away from the kids' bodies because they were doing more harm than good to themselves.

What you don't know in that situation is what we all learned as a nation after the twin towers fell. People united in anger can face some pretty hard shit together. Them being pissed at me together got them united.

What happened next was I talked slicker than a used car salesman and got them into counseling with me without them realizing it was counseling. They managed to keep it together and now, they've got a very beautiful family.

With grief, there are a potpourri of emotions. Some are happy the old fucker's dead while others are devastated. Some are happy the Will has them in it while others are overcome with the mounting bills of being caught unprepared.

What happens is anger in a lot of situations. Anger at oneself. Guilt over what could've been different. And the 'What if' game.

With me, personally, my first lover blew his head off. I say he blew his head off because he knowingly put the gun on cinder blocks and he knowingly duct taped them to a dining room chair. Then, he knowingly sat in front of it and tying fishing string through the door and calling me to come home.

For a long time, I blamed myself. For a long time, I played the game of 'what if' I'd stayed home that morning and what if I'd been able to talk him out of doing it. Instead, it could've been different and the what if might've included me being dead next to him because the what if of him being determined to do it no matter what comes into play.

I'm sure you've played the what if game, and I know you're blaming yourself. So, let me ask you a few simple questions.

If you'd known they were going to die that soon, would you have done something different?”



“Yeah.”



“Don't say anything else. I know you would've. You're not a murderer of your own kids for chrissake. Now, if you'd known someone else would kill your kids, would you kill that person?”



“Yeah”



“Ok, what would your kids say to you if they knew you were tearing yourself up about this like you are?”



“They'd tell me it wasn't my fault.”



“And yet, you're the parent, so how can you be wrong and how can you argue with angels?”



“I'm not getting what you're saying?”



“Robbie, let me tell you something. This face isn't the one I grew up with. I got beat and what you see is plastic surgery. They can do some amazing shit with it, but after the surgeries was rehab at a place in Columbia.”



“Aunt Lolly told everyone about your beating. She and Aunt Ellen and Jackie were there.”



“They saved my life because the police were going to let me lay there until I died.

What I'm getting to is this. Do you remember when you all came out there and stayed with us for the month?”



“Yeah.”



“Remember the guy who ran around with us?”



Robbie smiled, “The one you had the hots for?!”



“Yeah.”



“He got ran over by his wife after a fight. She ran over his head.”



“Oh man.”



“When I was in rehab, he was there. A gorgeous hot guy sitting there with a head about six inches wide and just looking like hell because the brain surgeries were that many.

What I'm saying is she wasn't there. I worked with him and he helped me. His parents were there on and off and they cheered each moment of progress they cheered him.”



“Ok”



“Let me tell you how it went. I graduated rehab and he stayed. He graduated, got out with motor skills all fucked up and a lot of his so-called friends wouldn't go around him and laughed.
Where I'm going with this is he chose to live in the same town knowing fully well his ex-wife's daddy was the Sheriff...and apparently thinking he was ten foot tall and bulletproof because he went right back to dealing drugs and is now in prison for over twenty years.”



“Really?!”



“No, what you're really asking me is, 'Rhette, what the fuck does this have to do with grief therapy?!'' Well, I'll tell you Michelin for brains got put in prison and on the day he went down, his Dad died of a major heart attack. All those so-called friends showed up and all the women who fantasized about the Dad showed up, and a good deal more showed.

I'll tell you I went and I stood in line for two hours to get in there to pay respects. When I got there, his Mom pulled me over and said, “Honey, I want you to stand right here because I want everyone of these so-called friends of his to know when it was down, you were there and when he needed someone, you did more for him than anyone else.

Now, I'm not bangin' my own drum here, but that made me feel good and when it was over, we went out and had coffee, she and I, because she knew when she was down, it was more about her getting herself right with the grief therapy than anything.

How she knew about it was because through all of that rehab, they didn't offer us one single solitary bit of counseling. I knew he's sitting there joking with me about wanting to jump his bone and I'm telling him it's not about the bone any longer, he needs to get real with himself.

So, in between jaw stretches and head turns, I'm counseling him on that lost relationship and the lost love...not on how long we can shag in a hospital bed.

When it was over, she told me I did more for him than anything and he really responded with me. She also told me he had asked them if they thought he was gay if he told them he loved me.”



“Whoa!”



“Yeah, but love comes in all shapes and sizes. You love your kids. You love your brother. You love your friends, and when the chips are down, you love the one who helps you. I can't say if he thought of me in that way, but then again, I could play the 'what if' game and ask, 'what if' we'd gotten real with each other that Summer and made a relationship?

So, Robbie, before you play the 'what if' game trying to make yourself out to be something you're not, you really need to listen to the little voices in your head because those sometimes are angels crying out trying to get you to stop hurting.

They know you loved them and they know if it were different, you'd protect them. Yeah, we all make those little decisions of putting things off until tomorrow, but sometimes we've got to go on.

Yeah, that's a hateful fuckin' thing to say, but let me tell you something. Do you remember my sister Amber?”



“Yeah.”



“She burnt in the house fire. The reason she burned was because we all got out and everyone was so into watching our house burn down, we didn't watch her. Mom wasn't there because she counted on us kids to know what was right and she went into the house to get the car because in the trunk of it were all the photos and keepsakes.
I can still hear Mom's scream that night and I can still see her passing out. It sticks with me because I feel guilt. I was supposed to be the one responsible and I let Mom down.

You know what it's like to feel that guilt and remorse. You know what it's like to have people stop talking when you enter a room because they don't want you to hear grown up conversations, but to a nine year old little boy, all I heard was them silently screaming at me that I'd killed my sister and they hated my guts.

What's worse is the suicide watch bullshit. Oh, he's depressed. He's not eating. He's fuckin' suicidal, and he'll grow out of it. Well, it takes time and time heals the worst of the wounds and there's not a day which goes by when I see Jilli on television that I don't think about what Amber would be doing with her life.”



I stood up and walked off. Then, I turned around and said, “And yet, I look at life around me and all this I've been blessed with and wonder if she's not there protecting me and watching out for me with little gifts.

Do you realize I went to New York to help Jaymes become a model yesterday and not only did I get that, but I'm being told by Clive Davis, I'm probably going to be a mega super star? How's that for luck?!”



Tommy asked, “Really?!”



“Yeah, that man sat stunned because he's got his top acts going out on tour this Summer and he's so fuckin' busy he was stunned thinking I was there and probably going to be bigger than them, and he was going to have to tell me he was too busy. BUT, do you want to know how it went?”



“How?!”



“The man watched the videos of me in drag, got a boner, and then got the hots for me. Suddenly, he's letting his dick make his decisions and that's when I took him to the kitchen and told him all the bad in my life about all this, about Kansas City, about me being in prison, and the only thing he saw was this ring on my finger and he's suddenly shitting himself and telling me he doesn't know how he'll make it happen, but he's going to do it out of respect.”



Robbie asked, “What ring?”



“The ring putting me in power over Kansas City.”



“Holy Fuck!”



“Yeah cuz, Gino Willed it to me. That's why Sal called you because I told him I was getting raped on concrete out here. He's probably laughing his ass off knowing the person doing the raping is my own cousin and I think he's hotter than fire.”



He laughed, “Thanks.”



“Don't mention it, but do me a favor. Do whatever the hell you guys can to get Alex out here because the mongoloids are trying to tell him he's ugly.”



They laughed and Tommy said, “He calls all the kinfolks back there mongoloids.”



Robbie laughed, “He called them that when we were kids too.”



“Robbie, when it's so bad all of them share the same eyebrow and all their foreheads look like the front end of my semi, you've got to wonder how we are related.”



He laughed, “I know they love us and that's what matters.”



“Yeah, and they'll do anything in the world for us, but you really need to go to a family reunion sometime. Do you get those emails telling you you might be a redneck if you've got family which looks like that?”



Tommy busted out laughing, “Jeff and John! Oh my God!”



“Yeah, what a good dentist could do with those buck teeth and what a good jack ass wouldn't do to have a set like them.”



He was laughing harder, “You gotta stop!”



“And Jackie, the poor thing let me tell you, she came to the last family reunion in a dominatrix costume and thought no one would notice. I'm asking her if she's used all the hooks for her toys and she tells me she doesn't play with toys anymore.”



Robbie was laughing. “What in the hell?!”



“No, seriously! Normally, I don't take pictures at a family reunion, but I sure did that one!”



I went over and showed him the picture. Robbie asked, “Who's that beside her?”



“That's Alex!”



“Little Alex!”



“Yeah, he's grown up and my God that kid's built and in those bibs is a horse cock we'd all kill to have, but get this because he wasn't wearing underwear and he's talking and he reached down and adjusts the package and wipes the sweat out from under his balls. Then, as smooth as a whistle, he reaches up and wipes his nose.”



They laughed, “Oh man!”



“I damned near fell over! And then, his Mom says, “Alex, you sure aren't cute like them others.” It was just blowing me out of the water!”



Tommy stood up, “Rhette, it'd be you who could go to a family reunion and find someone.”



“And you both who watch a video of your cousin and want to bang him!”



Robbie yelled, “Tommy, you get his legs, I'll get his arms.”



The took off running towards me and I said, “Uh huh fellas!”



The tackled me and we went down. Robbie landed next to me and I could see his eyes. “Robbie, let me in the inner circle and I'll help.”



He nodded, “I'll call.”



Tommy came up laying on the other side of me, “Rhette, you don't weigh anything!”



“And you two guys are built! So, you want to fuck, or walk around this place? You're the one who has me on the ground!”



Robbie got up, 'Damn!”



Tommy laughed, “Robbie, you're just pissed because he calls you out on it. I swear he sees something there brother.”



“Bullshit, it was you he was hugging when I got here!”



I said, “Yeah, and BOTH of you saw my video and wanted to lick the leftovers!”



They laughed and I got up, “Come on, we've got eight miles to walk and there are probably rattlesnakes out here.”



Robbie asked, “How many yards to you need?”



“What's the price? I'll decide if I'm going to need more or not.”



“I'll give it to you for cost.”



“What's that?”



“Twenty three a yard.”



“Son of a bitch!”



He smiled, “You're family.”



“And if I go home and tell all the mongoloids, you'll be invaded!”



Tommy laughed, “That's the non-advertised price Rhette!”



“Hang on, let me ask Dave if I can have my sisters.”



Robbie asked, “What's that mean?”



“Hang on a second. If he's close, you'll hear him yell.”



I dialed and Dave answered, “Yeah.”



“Wherever you are, yell whatever your answer is in regards to me getting the Ginosaur and the sisters when you find out I just got concrete at twenty three a yard.”



“What?!”



“There you are!”



I hung up the phone and they came over, Dave saw Robbie and smiled, “Decided to give us a deal?!”



Robbie said, “You could've told me Rhette was your boss.”



I interjected, “He's my manager. I'm not his boss. He runs it for me.”



Dave nodded, “I wanted to see if you'd give us the deal, but you chose not.”



Robbie said, “You're getting a deal. Rhette made enough calls, I couldn't help but get the deal to you guys. When I found out my cousin was the one over your project, he got the deal.”



Dave looked surprised, “You're cousins!”



“Yeah, Tommy's Robbie's brother.”



Dave said, “We'll certainly appreciate the lowered rate. In regards to the three more hotels Rhette, we'll get the green light and in regards to the four mile project, we'll need to speak with Jerry about changes to make it larger.”



Robbie asked, “How much larger?”



Dave said, “He's doubling it. He wants twelve stories instead of six.”



“That'll make you the largest hotel complex out here!”



Dave smiled, “Yeah, Rhette's got a thing about size.”



Sam chuckled, and Tommy started snickering.



“Fuck you Dave.”



He asked, “What are you guys doing out here?”



“We came out to walk the length of it, but I think they're doing all they can to talk me out of it. They don't realize four miles isn't that far.”



Tommy said,”Easy for you to say! You come from out there where it's uphill both ways to school!”



“You're talking about our parents and where they went to school. I rode on a bus. It wasn't the short bus, so I didn't see all of our relatives.”



He laughed and Dave said, “You need to stop it. They're going to be future record buyers of yours.”



“Yeah, my cousins tell me they'll take me to the Grammys if I put out afterwards.”



Dave chuckled and Sam said, “Rhette, we're going to leave you to them. You know you're going to be fondly remembered in our hearts, aren't you?!”



“Yeah, you won't be able to wipe the smiles off their faces. They've got a thing about thorns. Tommy says he's dating Roseeeeeee real steady.”



Robbie busted out laughing and Tommy put me in a headlock.



“Fucker! Your armpit hair is greasing my do!”



Dave laughed, “Guys, we'll see you later.”



“Love ya Dave.”



I reached around and pinched Tommy's nipple and pulled sharply to the left. “What the hell?!”



“It's worse than a titty twister!”



Tommy let me go and I stood up. “Guys, we're supposed to be adults. The playground's over there. I'm out here about a five billion dollar deal!”



Robbie said, “Five billion! Whew!”



“Three hotels at seven hundred million and this one at probably three and a half, it comes out to five when we put in furniture.”



“Damn!”



“What you don't know is we're not planning on a room in the place over forty dollars. We want it affordable and the occupancy rates to be nearly full all the time. I'll tell you with the Ginosaur being all suites, we'll have them all full.”



“How are you going to get payback?!”



“We'll have full restaurants, theaters, and casinos. The parks will be full and hopefully, we'll have a soccer team and maybe a pro football team in there.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah, I figure if we have it, we'll find something to put in there.”



“I was wondering why you built a big stadium, but I thought you left it half finished!”



“No, the rooms will have views in there. They can load a room for forty bucks and have prime seats. If that doesn't fill us on game day, nothing will!”



“Oh!”



I said, “Guys, it's all about thinking outside the box. Straight guys, all they can focus on is a box. Gay guys are looking elsewhere.”



Tommy laughed, “He's walking behind you when he says that Rob.”



Robbie smiled, “I have a question, how did you get boobs?”



“There's a bustier. I put water bra inserts in and had two guys the size of linebackers cinch me in it.”



He asked, “Do you dress in drag a lot?”



“Before I got my new face, I can tell you the number on one hand I technically dressed in drag. After they got me my new face, the times are so many, I've lost count.

Excuse me for a moment, if I'm out here and don't call a friend of mine and tell her I'm in town, she'll kill me.”



I dialed Pink. “Hello?”



“Hey Babe, I'm in town.”



“Do you realize what time it is?!”



“Yeah, and do you realize if I'd told you I was out here and hadn't called, I'd be dead now?!”



“Well, that's true. What are you doing out here?”



“Walking through the Ginos and planning on doing some remodeling, building, and rehabbing.”



“You there now?”



“Yeah, do you want me to shut down a theater?”



“Why?”



“Because I've written three new songs and Clive heard me sing. He wants to push me as being an act.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah, but it's got to be drag, I might need to borrow clothes.”



She laughed, “Like I'd need to borrow from you. Where are you going to be?”



“How about the Americana. There's someone in there I'm firing tonight.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah, she apparently needs the money so bad she's forgetting she called the owner a cornholeer twenty years ago.”



“OH!”



Robbie and Tommy were laughing



“Who's that?”



“My cousins. They're from out here, but related more closely to the mongoloids than I am.”



She laughed, “It's the same family tree hon.”



“And if you go back far enough, we're all related to each other. So, sis, why don't you and Corey get over here!”



“I'll be there. I don't know if he'll come. He'll tell me I'm disturbing his beauty sleep.”



“Tell him that ass looks pretty enough and I said so.”



She laughed and said, “I'll bring it. The rest of him might not appreciate it, but you'll see two big butt cheeks.”



“If they're big, they're not his...that's a softball ass. That's not big.”



“What are yours?”



“I'm told I've got a bubble ass by someone who matters.”



“Oh?!”



“We'll catch up. Do you have a cd of your music?”



“Yeah.”



“I want to practice it.”



“You sing it better than me, that's not practicing!”



“You're going to love the new songs I've got.”



“I'll be there.”



“Ok, I'll see you.”



I hung up and said, “Guys, we've got to go clear out a theater. She's coming and you two are invited.”



“Who is it?”



“A surprise.”



“She's from here?”



“Yup, but a lot of stars are here.”



Robbie said, “Tommy, don't wear yourself out guessing. We'll find out in a few minutes.”



“It's a woman?!”



“Yeah Tommy.”



“Is she cute?”



“Yeah, very much so if you ask me.”



“And you sing her music?”



“Yeah.”



“Can I have a hint?”



“If I sang you one line of one of her songs, you'd cum all over yourself and totally forget about me.”



Robbie laughed, “That he would.”



“Shut Up Robbie!”



“I'll leave you back here with U and Ur Hand”



Robbie whirled around, “Really?!”



Tommy said, “He's joking Robbie. I'm not jacking off here!”



Robbie laughed, “It flew on by!”



“I knew it would.”



He looked at me, “Really?!”



“Yeah, she's a good friend. She's bringing her husband, but he's real cool.”



“Oh man! I've seen him on adventure sports.”



Tommy looked at us, “How'd you get told who it is when I'm standing here?!”



Robbie looked and me and just laughed. I said, “Let's go Get the Party Started.”



We went in and went to the Americana Theater. The guy said, “Mr Michaels, the evening is over for us. Our act got fired.”



“We've got another coming on. It's a private performance, so we need you guys to stay on.”



“Country?”



“Nope, rock.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, but I'm going to put on a few songs for you to practice by ear. They're rough, but they were written this morning.”



“We'll try.”



I went to the computer and said, “Here they are.”



I played them and the guys stood there and listened. The one guitarist said, 'Man, that's good!”



“The next one is one I want a music box sound on. It's the same melody on a piano, so watch and I'll get it for you.”



The pianist and I went over and I said, “It's this over and over except at the end when I do it without music.”



“That melody is haunting.”



“I did a scan search on my phone and it's supposed to find all the music with that in it and it came back as 'no results found'. When you hear the words to it, you'll cry. Just get that played and looped and make it so I can press one key to stop it and I'll be fine.”



“Ok, that's already done then.” he said smiling. “I doubt if I cry. The sentimental songs don't affect me.”



“Good, if you break up, I'll know it's good.”



He smiled, “You're confident there!”



“I've made everyone cry who's heard it so far.” I turned around, “Go tell the man in the door when Pink arrives to let her in.”



“She's coming!”



“Yeah, and it's a secret as to who it is, so don't let it out!”



He said, “I want to hear that first song again.”



I put it on and he nodded, “Ok, you did good on the piano. It's reminiscent of the old Abba songs.”



“Play me your take on it and we'll see.”



He started and got into it. The bass player was strumming along and the drummer did a good job. He stopped and I said, “I'll play it, go to the door.”



He nodded and I started in where he left off.



Tommy and Robbie came up on stage and I said, “Guys stand right there, I'm going to do some sound checks.”



“Ok”



I stopped and said, “Guys, we're going to do a sound check for me on these mics. The first song I want us to do is 'Stand Back' and then let's go into 'Time After Time'. Do you know them?”



Everyone said they did. So I got the synthesizer going. When I hit the voice, the guys all wheeled around.



The piano guy came back up smiling real big. “Go on out to the mic. You sound good back there without it.”



I nodded and went to the mic. As I sang, I got the gestures down.



The guys who had mics started singing back up.



Instead of going to 'Time After Time', the guitarist hit into the intro of the 'Edge of Seventeen'. I went into it and the air went electric. I knew it and I knew the guys were feeling it.



The doors opened in walked Pink, singing back up. The guys went into a state of shock, it seemed.



I went into the line, “She was no more than a baby then”



She came up on stage and came over to the mic and started sharing it with me. She handed me the outfit and said, “Go get changed.”



I laughed, “Ok!”



I went over on the side of the stage and stripped. In no time, I was throwing my hair over and getting in the shoes she brought with it.



At the end of the song, she said, “Guys, do 'Pill' for me.”



They went into it and I went out and she smiled, “Damn, don't you look better than me in that!”



I hit the throaty beginning of it. By the chorus, she was singing beside me.



When the second verse came up, she pointed at her self and sang, I went over to Tommy and he was losing it, “I can't believe this!”



I hugged Robbie and said, “See, boobs!”



“You look hot!”



“No make up and no tats. All I did was threw over the hair.”



Corey was standing off to the side, I went over and hugged him, “Hey babe. Thanks for puttin' up with me!”



He smiled, “She told me you wanted my ass here. I told her the rest had to go too because I knew what you'd do to my ass!”



I laughed, “My cousins. The blond is Tommy and the bruiser is Robbie.”



“Robbie looks familiar.”



“He owns a concrete company.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah.”



“Man! I used to work for him!”



“He's a fan of yours.”



“Man! He was an asshole to work for!”



“He's better when you get to know him.”



I went back over and started hitting the soulful highs. At the end, we went into 'Party' she did the laugh at the beginning and we did it in twin harmonics. It didn't take for her but one time to miss the back ups and I was filling in with them.



She laughed, “It's like hearing my own voice singing those parts to me!”



I went over to the piano player and said, “We need 'U and Ur Hand' and then, we'll calm down.”



“Ok, I'll get Bruce, the drummer told. He'll let everyone else know.”



I went back out and said, “The next one is going to be 'Hand'. My cousin Tommy is going to get the embarrassment with it.'



She smiled, “Is there something to that?!”



“He said his hand is seeing plenty of action.'



“He's cute...well, both of them are cute. Are they single?”



“Yeah.”



“They decent?”



I nodded. When the song ended, the drummer took us into 'hand' and I went over to Tommy and took his hand. He came out and both of us started singing it to him. He rushed off the stage and she laughed. We got made it out and I said, “Guys, let's have “You Can't Do That' and I'll show her what I wrote.”



They hit the intro and she looked surprised. When I hit the lyrics, she bowed, “Man!”



“Get up here and help!”



“Help! You don't need help hon!”



“Then take my phone and watch the video I'm putting together of it.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah. There it is. Hang on, wait on me to finish the two after this.”



When it ended, I said, “Guys, she loves it. Take a break for a moment while I sing you the next one with that synthesizer melody.”



The pianist hit it and walked off. I took the first round of it as an intro and then went into it.



The look on her face was instantly stunned. The pianist stared and then, when I went into the second verse, I saw the tear and nodded. It went on and at the end of the end of the second, I added the hic of crying and then went into the third with the sound of me crying. By the time, I hit the key on the keyboard, and sang, “Baby, I'm Sorry”. I was at the mic stand and turned around.



“So what do you think?!” I chuckled and said, “I know it's bad guys. Just throw tomatoes!”



She was over with Corey



The pianist came out, “My God, that's a hit! The pain in that song is overwhelming.”



“It got you to cry.”



“Yeah, I'm a big old softy!” he smiled, “Not! When you get a rock to cry with that song, you know you've got something.”



I took the mic stand over to the piano and said, “Ok, it's time to make you guys smile, so here's the last one.” I went into 'One Road' and by the end everyone was laughing.



She came over and said, “Hon, as soon as I heard those words, chills went through me for all the times I've put Corey through hell. Then, he said he thought you wanted me down here to hear that song for him!”



“Let me explain the song to you guys.”



The pianist came over and asked, “Mr Michaels, I, I mean the band and I would like to know if you know any Samantha Fox lyrics.”



“Yeah.”



“We're her former band. We'd consider it an honor if you'd sing along with us.”



“Sure, let me explain that song.”



I went to the mic and explained 'Baby' to everyone. By the time I was done, I said, “Corey, you know Steve and I went through shit. You didn't meet Kevin and I pray you'll give Jaymes a chance, but he's the reason that first verse got wrote. All the others after that came from all the times I've said I'm sorry. I think I'm going to need to put that in the video. Everyone takes it personally and in their own way.”



He came over and hugged me, “It got to me. I heard her hurting and it killed me.”



“Babe, it's a painful song. None of us lead lives which are pain free and if it gets people to thinking, then it's going to sell a million. If not, it's a song which will sink.”



He smiled, “You know it's going to put you in the top ten forever!”



“Yeah, but now I've got to get naughty with the fellas.”



The pianist asked, “Do you know 'Do What You Want To Do'. I nodded, “Yeah, then, we'll do 'Do Ya Do Ya'.”



He nodded, “Did you hear that guys?!”



He took us into the intro and I started into the “Ta ta dah de”s and he nodded.



Somewhere during the song, Dave and Sam came in. They sat down and Dave held up his phone. I pulled mine out of my boob and the text read, 'Friends coming from all over'



By 'Do Ya', the door was opening and people were coming in. I spent a lot of time waving to people. At the end, we went into 'I want to have some fun' and that's when Patrik walked in.



Pink walked over and asked, “Did you know this was going to happen?”



“Dave made calls. I guess he heard we were here.”



“I'm not mad! It's just all those stars!”



“Yeah, but Patrik's there! He's never seen me in drag.'



“Who's that?”



“The hot stud up on the fourteenth row to the right.”



“Oh!”



By the vocal gymnastics, I was doing them and then doing the background highs and then the rap man in the backs too. I was busy with the vocal work and when it was over, I said, “Folks out there in the audience, I want to thank you for coming. I'm here working on the three I wrote this morning. So, if you want to hear them, we'll do them for you again and then, it's going to be open mic where I'll do what I can to match your voice.”



Pink came to the mic and said, “Everyone, I've not met you, but I'll tell you he's got my voice down perfectly. I lent him the outfit and as you see, he does that better too!”



Everyone laughed and I turned around. “DO you have one more “You Can't Do That” in you guys?”



The drummer went into his count with his sticks and I said, “This song is less than twenty four hours old from writing to what you see. Please bear with me if it's not polished.”



The vocal gymnastics went out again and then, we went into 'Baby, I'm sorry' where I explained the song as the melody tinkled out of the synthesizer before I went into it. By the end, I knew it was definitely time to get into 'One Road' real fast. By the end, I said, “Ok, I performed my three written today. It's your turns.

Cyndi, I was about to do 'Time After Time' before you arrived, so if you'd do me the honor of coming up, I'll show you how I do it.”



She came running up on the stage and hugged me. “How are YOU baby!”



“I'm doing well. It's been a long time!”



“Too long!”



By then the synth was leading us in and she sang the first verse when we went into the chorus together. She ran across the stage and stage and stared at me. She started singing and that's when I went into the guy's accompanying part. She smiled real big and I whispered, 'Please don't be offended'.



“Offended?! You're doing it perfect!”



“Can we do 'Money'?”



She smiled, “Ok!”



I went over to the pianist and said, “Money Changes Everything Next.”



He nodded and asked, “What about 'Girls'?”



“Do that before 'Money'. That will be fun.”



I went over and said, 'Girls' first, then 'Money'. She nodded and then went into the last verse soulful. I sang along in the original style and she looked surprised. “That was GOOD!”

When 'Girls' started, she pointed and I went into it she whispered, 'It's rough hitting the highs in this.”



I turned, “Deb came in. Do you think it's ok if we get her up here?”



“Yeah, she's got to be in a good mood to be here.”



“I'll do 'The Tide Is High' with her and if she's in a bad mood, we'll get someone else up here fast.”



She nodded and I went into the second verse. When it ended, we went into a totally wild 'Money'.



The pianist motioned me over, I leaned in, “We've got a good seg into “Mony Mony” if you want to do it.”



“Yeah.'



I went out and she came running at me on the heels of the high heels she was on. I caught her and said, “We're about to go into 'Mony Mony'”



“Really!?”



“Yeah.”



She smiled and I turned and nodded. Suddenly, the music got funky and the bass took us in where I hit it with Billy Idol growls and the lip curl.



She laughed and we had fun with it.



I was looking at her when she said, “Oh my Gawd”



“What?!”



“Oh man! Get him up here!”



I looked and by then, they had a spot on us which just totally blinded me.



“Who is it?”



She was over at the keyboardist.



By the time I was out of the song, I heard the entrance to the 'Ping Pong' Song and I hit the voice. I felt an arm around my waist and then being enveloped in a slow dance and him singing in my ear.



I'll be honest, chills went through me and then, I realized he was nuzzling my neck. I thought, “Dude, two can pull it” and started doing it back. Then, I stepped back and started singing, “I can love you” and he winked.



He sang the verse and said, “Rhythm Divine' next.”



“Ok, but after that, we're going to take it to “Tell It To My Heart”.



He laughed and I said, “You gotta make your request with the piano player. Tell him mine after yours.”



I turned and went into his lyrics. Soon, I felt arms around me with him dancing close.



At the end, they went into 'Rhythm' super great and when the synth hit for 'Tell It', I was belting it out. After the first verse, I was hearing chuckles because I'd already drug him in. I said, “Just do the dance.”



“I don't know it!”



“Then listen to the words and let me do it.”



“What do you want me to do?”



“Lay on the floor.”



“Huh?!”



“On your back”



He lay down and by the second, when I squatted over him, the laughter was very clear. I pretended I was riding him and leaned over. “Now it's time to stand up and stand behind me. I'll dance.”



“What room are you in?”



“Crown Suite.”



“Can I go there?”



“Not right now. There's four hours worth of musicians here. When Dave goes up, I'll get him to get you up there.”



I walked over and asked, “Do you guys know 'Naked Without You?”



“I do!”



“The mix version?”



He laughed, “Yeah.”



“He's going to leave the stage and then, it's that one for me and then, I've got to get someone up here.”



“That one was funny. He clearly didn't know it!”



I went back and went into the last verse with him dancing behind me and me bent over. I stood up and hugged him. “Hon, go down and tell Dave I gave you permission.”



“You'll be there?”



“Yeah.”



He walked off the stage and I said, “Ladies and Gentlemen, it might've been a short date, but I swear I rocked his world! Now, this is how I feel without him up here. Someone get up here quick!”



The drums started pounding in their conga beat and then the bass kicked in.



I sang the first “Naked” and then said, “This song has highs which tax me. I'll make it, but without water, this is terrible. I mean, I'm wet after that...but...you know!”



By the third minute in the vocal gargles, my voice was telling me it needed hydration bad. I was going raspy. When I went into the highs and got into the high where it was held for a twenty two count. It was fading and at the break downs going into the end, when I needed to do the record scratches, I was downright hoarse. At the end, when I said, “That's It!” It was it.



I looked over and Deb was standing there. She came out and said, “Poor Baby, you put on a helluva show, but I know that throttled you!”



“How are you darlin'.”



“Better, I've got new meds.”



“Great. I'll be back. I've got to get some water.”



She went up and said, “Let's hear it for Rhette Michaels!”



I went down and over to the bar. “Water!”



He handed me a bottle and said, “I had it here, but couldn't get anyone to give it to you. They were all watching you wear out that stage!”



Patrik came over, “Hey!”



“Hey hon!”



“You look way different in that!”



“I look like a girl. That's what it's going to take to sell me as a singer.”



“And you'll be huge! Your voice....it's very good!”



“What did you think of the ones I wrote?”



“I cried.”



“There was some of that scene you saw in there.”



“I know.”



“You're not talking. You upset?”



“No.”



“What's wrong?”



I looked in his eyes and he smiled, “Do you think I look good? Is that the problem?”



“Hot.”



“Is that messin' with your head?”



“No. Regretful, but not in a bad way.”



He stepped closer and asked, “How are you doing?”



“I think I'm going to be ok. For a while, it was touch and go, but now I'm coming around the bend and instead of wondering whether I'm going to sink or swim, I'm water skiing. Life's dragging me along and now, I guess I'm going to be a star.”



“You deserve it.”



“I want to spend time with you.”



“I do too. We're about to leave. I had to come say hi when I heard you were in.”



“Thank you.” I hugged him and said, “Patrik...”



He hugged me closer and said, “I'm not supposed to care like I do, but I do.”



“We've got a long life ahead of us.”



“I don't want to let you go.”



“Honey, you're not letting me go. We're going to be in each other's lives and when the time comes...”



He let me go. “When it comes, I'm not letting you go again.”



“Don't, because I won't.”



“I cried thinking about what you've went through and how I feel like I made the wrong decision.”



“We'll live it out and see where it takes us. You're in my heart.”



I turned and said, “Let me have four more waters. I'm going to need an ice bucket for up there.”



I looked up at him and said, “You're so capturing my heart and where some lassos are let go without leaving rope burns, yours aren't letting go. I know if I've got yours like you do mine, we're a pair.”



He smiled, “I'm in contract talks again with the Bellagio.”



“Why? I thought that was 20 years!”



“They want to buy me out. They want house players.”



“If you can't get satisfaction, come here. We don't have the apartments like they've got, but we're certainly doing good with our Crowns.”



“I'd be fine with a little room.”



“Not with a family you won't!”



“She's going to stay at Monte Carlo with the children.”



“You don't sound like that's happy.”



“It's not.”



“Care to discuss it?”



“Next year. After next year, I'll be able to discuss it. Our marital contract ends then.”



“I don't understand those.”



“My publicist had me sign it. It puts us in a marriage like marriage, but when it runs out, I'm either paying more money, or we part. I'm not going to sign again.”



“Sign one with me.”



He smiled, “As you are now?”



“Yeah, but I'm not giving you three years. Thirty, but never three.”



“Three hundred with you wouldn't be long enough.”



“Please call me. Phone calls can't be a violation of the contract.”



“I will.”



I hugged him again and said, “I've got to go up.”



“I'm going to sit here again.”



I went over and sat next to Gladys, “I'm honored.”



She smiled, “Anna called me and told me you were putting on a little performance. She said to get here and thank myself afterwards.



“Will you sing with me?”



“Sure.”



“I'm going to do a song people are going to hate me for on my my album. It just came to me, but I've got to do it. Will you do it with me?”



She smiled, “What is it?”



“A remake of 'The Old Rugged Cross'. I want to put it to more modern music and make it contemporary with a lot of soul.”



“I'll do it.”



“When we go up, I'm going to do an Akon song. I might be a drag queen, but there's soul in this body.”



She laughed, “I'll be up there.”



I went up on stage and Debbie came over singing Atomic. “Do you want to do Maria?”



“Yes!”



“You sing it. I'll back you.”



“I'll be going operatic on the chorus.”



She smiled, “It'll be pretty.”



When we went into it, she stood there with her hand on my lower back when I hit the chorus and took it operatic, her hand came off my back and that was my clue to step away because the manic depression had hit.



She stepped in with the verse damned near a growl she was so pissed. I thought, “Lady, I respect you, but I'll be damned if you throw a control move on me when we're doing a duet.” so I stepped back in. The move she pulled was putting her leg in front of me in front of the microphone and I walked off the stage.

In a flash, I texted Dave. “She's went manic. Tell her f-n doctor the meds didn't work”



He texted back, “Fuck”



At the end of the song, she killed the band and went into a banter about how I ruined her song and then, it went downhill from there. I went out and said, “Deb, the exit is stage left. Get there, get yourself to the doctor before you don't find yourself working anywhere in this city.”



“Fuck you Rhette!”



“Fish don't go snapper on me!”



She laughed, but Dave was there at the stairs.



I went up to the mic and said, “Ladies and Gentlemen, Deb when she's taking her meds is wonderful. Deb off them swings more than Dorsey ever did.”



There were chuckles, and I said, “Gladys has been a dream of mine. A dear friend of ours called her and said I was belting out a few here tonight and she needed to come. I'll tell you I feel underdressed for the occasion, but while I spoke with her down there, an inspiration hit me and I've reserved a spot on the album for a duet with her. She's gracefully accepted and I'll tell you I'm so honored.

Before I sing with her, I'm going to sing a song which hits me in the heart by Akon. It's supposed to be light, but it's soulful underneath and I'd be remiss if I didn't take it that way. It's called “Don't Matter”. Pat, this is our song.”



When they hit the entrance, I hit the song like Mariah and threw in some Sarah Brightman but with soul of Aretha. The words were breathless and full of sorrow.



I'll admit I was in it and losing it. At the end, I felt cloth brush my shoulder and turned, he enveloped me in a hug. “Thank you.”



It must've hit with everyone because the applause was deafening from the forty people in the room.



“I must go or I'll cry again.”



“You're loved.”



“I know and you are too.”



When he walked off, 'Mr Lonely' began. I went into the rap and of course the words got changed. All the girls went to Pats.



At the end, Gladys walked out on the stage with 'Midnight Train' going. I went into it with her and she looked surprised...then I surprised her by going Al Franken with her.



What was great was she gave me eyes and pulled more soul from me than I knew was possible with just eyes. The depths and bass I obtained and the tone coming out when I took it to the highs and then at the end, I gave the signal to cut the band and did the Boxcar Willie train whistle trailing off into a cry.



She ran to me and hugged me. “Honey, I've done that song thousands of times, but that was the best it's ever been done. You don't put just words in it, you feel it.”



She went over to the microphone and said, “Rhette asked me to do this song and I wondered what we'd do to make it different. All I can say is it just got done the best it's been done and when you hear me go back to my roots with my voice, you know I've done been back to church. Rhette, come up here.”



I went over and she smiled, “You told me you hoped a little drag queen wouldn't embarrass me. I'll tell you a little drag queen showed me how it's got to be done for you to perform it. You said you were honored, but I'll tell you the honor became mine.”



She turned, “He's requested a song that when he said how he wanted to do it, I wondered to myself how the two could collide and make it work. Now I'm wondering how high a spiritual song will go on the charts!”



I went to the piano and said, “I want you to pull the Old Rugged Cross across Georgia and bring me some old time spiritual soul. Do you think you can do it?”



“One second.”



He went into the synth and said, “We're going to take it like this.”



He started and I said, “Ok, follow my voice as I beat box it and have you wondering all over the state.”



I started in and he nodded and sped up the tempo and followed my notes.



I nodded, “Now you're there. Let's do it from the start.”



I walked up and said, “I think we're in the right church. They were lost on the wrong side of Georgia.”



She laughed and then, I said, “You follow my lead because you're going to hear yourself, Aretha, and a whole lot of Big Mama in this.”



She gave me a surprised look.



By the time my vocals got us on the hill far away, I already saw a lot of people standing. She came in and we worked it. By the time we got to the end, I'd went to Mariah highs and eeked in some Patti on my way back to Aretha. At the end, I cut the band and went into an acapella 'Amen' and then added the ending of 'Tell me if you know Jesus. Say his name...Give it to me louder...Tell me you mean it...I want you to know my Jesus...Amen.



I hugged her and said, “Honey, that's what I want on the album.”



Dave came running up. “We've got it on tape up in the booth! That was the best I've heard. You work that voice.”



I chuckled, “Gladys, this is my best friend Dave. I think he's impressed.”



“Dave, I want you to meet Gladys. Anna called her. Remind me to send her a pint of my life's blood in gratitude.”



Gladys smiled and said, “I expected a dozen roses, but you give a part of yourself for real!”



Dave chuckled, “He doesn't say he wants many things, but when he says he's making a dream come true, he's got to be happy.”



I hugged her and asked, “When I have the concert starting my tour, will you be there?”



“Yes.”



“Are you on tour?”



“We're here.”



“Let me tell Clive I want you on tour with us. Do you mind?”



“Clive Davis?”



“Yes ma'am.”



“He's handling you?”



“He says he will, but he says I'm going to be too big for him. He says once I'm released, I'll fill arenas. I doubt that, but if I could fill a bar of about three hundred, that'd be good.”



She smiled, “Hon, you're going to fill those arenas, stadiums, and know touring.”



“I'll tell you we're not going to tour hard. I'm not going to be a slave to it in order to sell records. He knows I don't need the money.”



“That puts you at an advantage.”



“You should know I'm not going to ask for a lot of money for a concert ticket. If I've got to lose money doing it, I'll do it, but we're going to probably tour with a small band and not much glamor. We'll have a cap on a ticket at thirty bucks and the nosebleeds are going to be ten. I want people to see it and able to afford an album afterwards if they're impressed. If not, they're not going to leave real disappointed thinking it was a total waste of money.”



“Let me know if you get it like that.”



“He and I have to talk. This thing is building and Anna wanted me to tour with her and El wants me with him. Clive says I can't get it done that soon, so he wants me out there on my own.”



“You can do it. You've got the drawing power.”



“Let me show the crowd what else I can do. You might watch to see if you want to associate yourself with it.”



“Why?”



“Because some of it's out there.”



I went to the mic and said, “Ladies and Gentlemen, the band is going to take a break. While they're on break, we're going to put the jumbo on showing you some vids I've done prior to tonight.”



We went up to the booth and I got the computer linked to my server. I pulled the vids across and put them on.



I went down and did a meet and greet thing with everyone. Those who were interested were watching and Pink came over, “Hon, we're going home.”



I hugged her and said, “I really want to thank you. As you can see, it turned into something way bigger than what I intended.”



She smiled and hugged me close. “You worked it and I'll tell you now, Corey is just blown away by what got done.”



“Where's he at?”



“Getting the car.”



“Ok, tell him I love him too. You're like a sister to me and he's like family.”



She smiled, “I know he knows it. I feel like we're the ones who got honored by being called to be a part of it.”



“No, it was me who got you out of bed. In the morning, just smile and say, “Honey, I had the strangest dream and see if he's mindfucked?!”



I laughed and she laughed, “I'll do that!” We hugged again and she left.



Tommy and Robbie came over, “Rhette, that video of you is hot!”



“That's me on Halloween the year before last. At the end, Kevin does a strip. It's real. People are going to be blown away, but I forewarned them.”



I watched people as they watched the video of me riding the bull and then watched their reactions as Kevin stood up and stripped. When he got to the boxers and when he ripped them off down to the g-string, the intake of breath made even those who weren't paying attention look.



I went over to Gladys, “That's what I meant.”



“Who's that?”



“My ex. We were together for fourteen years. The title of that commercial ought to be this is you on Viagra.”



She laughed.



After that, the recordings of Anna, El, and I recording at Anna's came on.



“Oh, there you are! She said you asked for a copy!”



“Yeah, that was last night.”



“You do her voice terrific!”



“That's me out of this outfit.”



She chuckled, “You're a great looking guy.”



“Clive doesn't think he can sell it without me doing drag, so we're going to make me the best drag performer anywhere.”



“You have the look to do a lot of them.”



“All that changes is the hair. I'm trying to figure out how to do it without going in to doing a lot of wigs. My fear would be losing a wig and making a stadium of people grossed out.”



“Hon, may I give you some advice?”



“Yes.”



“A long time ago, I learned classy is as classy does. I wear clothes I'm comfortable wearing and I know I look good.”



“You always look good and classy. That's why I admire you so much. I saw a video on YouTube with you, Dionne, and Diana on Oprah and to be honest, I thought you were the only person there who looked at ease and showed through.”



“There was another with Patti.”



“I remember that one too.”



“I try not to overdress for a situation.”



“May I ask you a simple favor?”



“Sure.”



“Back in the 80's, you did a video with El and two others which was for a charity. Would you consider doing it if it were helping to feed people here? People are suffering and need the food in our food pantries.”



“Of course. Get whomever you want to sign on and we'll do it.”



“If I do it and invite people, we might end up with a 'We Are The World' thing. As you can see, this is me having a little get together!”



I paused and said, “Come to the keyboard with me for a moment. I just got an idea for a song.”



“Just like that?!”



“That's how it happens.”



I went up and asked, “Do you think Aretha would do it with us?”



“I imagine.”



“I want to ask Tom Jones too. I can hear his voice.”



I put my hands on the keys and said, “What you are witnessing is divine. I'll tell you I write songs and have absolutely no idea how to play the piano.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah, but I hear the melody and I manage to peck it out so it makes sense. Now, here's Aretha's voice.



“I fed a hungry child today and wiped the tears from his face

His mama cried and I knew for one night everything would be have it's place .



Then Elton comes in



But tomorrow we've got hunger again and jobs won't come without them surviving to be hired. Give your heart and let it shine through for them some food.



You come in.



It's a simple wish. Jesus fed a throng from just a few fish. With our song, we know it won't be long until this wish makes it to a dish.



“Ooh, that's good!”



“Hon, I worked at a plant which got closed right before Christmas. No one had a clue it was happening. The stock was at fifty before we went home at seven am and when the end of trading happened that day, we were bankrupt and our stock was worth thirty eight cents. You don't know shock until you're in a room full of people who thought it was safe to max credit cards for Christmas and then have no way to pay them.

I'll tell you within that year, of three hundred people, four committed suicide, seven fell into addictions, almost a hundred and forty got divorced, and one of them had the money to make it through...me.

I'm not banging my own drum there. Please don't think that. I'll tell you before I went to prison, I held credit cards like they did and after, I believed being debt free was the way to go. So while they bought Escalades and Navigators, I drove an old car and lived in a house which was paid off. They made fun, but when that happened, suddenly, everyone was waiting for me to say, 'I told you so', but it never happened.

I will state this. One other person managed to pull himself out of it. He went to a company making plastic bottles. He's still working there and has a nice young family in a house which is beautiful.

Another took the money from his Dad committing suicide and paid for his home where he had five babies below the age of five and now owns a string of lube and oil shops. He worked hard and made it.

One of the saddest situations is a gorgeous young black man who put Denzel Washington to shame in looks. He did something stupid, ran from the police and they estimate his car was doing a hundred and thirty when it went off the inner loop and flew across another highway and slammed into an abutment killing him instantly.



She closed her eyes and shook her head.



“That's but one factory closing. Since then, it's went to being like watching popcorn pop. Each little explosion is another life affected and only their decisions affect the outcome.

I'll tell you I know in our family, there was a time when a gift of charity saved us. Mom felt like a scourge for taking it, because she believed in working for every dime she made, but I'll tell you that food and those winter clothes after our house burned was what it took to make us survive and remain intact.

I know I'm dominating this here, but let me tell you one last thing and you'll see how even the charities are with this. In our little town, I donated. I thought I was doing great. I patted myself on the back only to find out the pastor of the church suddenly was driving a Mercedes and all the money I'd donated for twelve hundred people to have a turkey was wasted.”



“You can't let one misdeed affect your generosity.”



“I'm not. Since then, if I want someone to have twelve hundred turkeys, I buy them twelve hundred turkeys and I'll tell you the jive turkey who got the money was soon found to have misappropriated funds to the tune of several hundred thousand from his church...but, if you steal that much from a bank, you get twenty years. Do it from a church and you're forgiven and told to go and sin no more. The church forgot to think about all the affected hungry mouths which did without in that meanwhile.”



I stopped and said, “Man, a song is what I'm supposed to be writing and instead, I got sidetracked.”



She smiled and gave a slight chuckle. “Your heart is in the right spot. You needed to say it to let me know you feel their pain.”



“I'm at a loss of how to do it. I'd want to sell a record and get money, but I don't want some charities to get it while others don't. How do I do that?”



“It sounds like you need a telethon instead of a song. You should invite everyone and then put on the bottom of the screen if someone is a charity, to call in and give their non-profit status and we'll get them on the list.

For that, I'll get the word out and we can put it into being a world wide event. This economy is global and many are suffering.”



“Ok, while we do that, we can contact major food places to get food donated too. I sure know we don't want peanut butter with the way that's going!”



“Isn't that terrible!”



“After the Jif thing, that one is just bad. It irks me because that's a business which is so subsidized by our government, it's insane.”



“Is it?”



“The farmers are subsidized because peanuts from out of the country flood us. So, they sell to companies which pay that subsidy. Then, we find out the company our money is going to is doing that. Did you know most of that peanut butter went to our military and to the FEMA?”



“I heard that.”



“So our boys in harms way get killed by salmonella over there and them jerks don't get charges. They killed seven people here for crying out loud!”



“Back to that subsidy thing. Has that been going on a long time?”



“Since Jimmy Carter was there. It was a pat on the back because he was a peanut farmer and was losing money to competing with the foreign growers.”



“It's gotten to be our food supply is unsafe all over the place.”



“It's everyone hurrying to meet Walmart*'s demands. I'll tell you I'm fortunate in the fact my parents put out a really huge garden every year. I do my part because it's a tradition with me. On Valentines day, it's tradition everything red hits the soil. No, I can't put tomatoes out, but they go in starters in the house. That way, they come on early and they come on strong, but this year, mama told me to leave the maters be because my daddy has went into this volunteer gardening thing in a huge way.”



“What's that?”



“Ok, for me to tell you it's sort of a joke...well, it started out as a joke. My daddy threw some things like punkins and melons down over the hill in the woods.

Then, my brother went mushroom huntin' and he came back telling about how vines were growing all over the hillside. My daddy went and looked and sure enough there were punkins and melons growin' wild.

So, out in front of the house, they've got this huge cliff, but before you get to it, you've got about ten acres which is state owned, but they don't mow it. Well, he went out and he took seeds from cucumbers and all sorts of things and broadcast them all over the hillside. Of course, the next year, they came up volunteer.

Last year, the only things in the garden were tomatoes. We had like a hundred and sixty of each kind. Of course, my Dad threw down the rotten ones and left the cherry and the grape ones out there which were bad. Now, they're lookin' forward to the volunteer garden coming on strong.”



“Oh that sounds so much like home.”



“My mama's good with it. They've got a huge basement and for a long time, we bought canning jars at auctions because I could get several hundred for something like a quarter. No one wanted to haul them away, so I took them.

It got to be where they had to go to the store and get those metal racks you put together. They did it and I never paid much mind because one here and there doesn't add up to the entire basement looking like a library full of pickled and canned goods, but it sure is.”



“Oh that sounds good.”



“If you talk with Anna, ask her to tell you about my Mama. You'll hear Anna rave about her. What I'll do is when you've got time, I'll run you up home. You'll get to see where I'm building my mansion and you'll get to see what it's like.”



“She said you bought an island in New York to build a mansion!”



“Yeah. Let's go out there and I'll show you pictures of it. What I'm doing is I'm having our architect take the same blueprints and building me two more like the one I've got in South Carolina. I love that house and everyone who's seen it loves it. It's antebellum and modern, but it'll withstand a hurricane and has managed to keep me in it through three lovers so far.”



“Who's Patrik?”



“Oh! Patrik! Let me tell you about him. I'll tell you how I met him and then, you'll see how it's been.

Out there, you met my cousins. The blond, Tommy, has my aunt living with him. He got divorced and my aunt is now raising her grand babies there.

I went over to see the new house and what I expected was a dump. She told me she was living in his basement and she had me on a mission to get there to move her back to Missouri damned fast! Instead, I get there and it's like a friggin' mini mansion and the basement was like a condo with it's own entrance to a side street and looking like it doesn't even belong to the house on the other way around the corner.

So, after I'd settled down and realized sometimes my aunt likes to stir me up, we're laying out by the pool in this humongous yard. It's landscaped to the nines and across the fence, I see Patrik out walking in a Speedo. Needless to say, I was like a horndog on point although Kevin and I were together.

So, he comes over and the guy is stunning hot...not just in looks, but with the accent, the charm, and everything. That's when I found out he was a professional poker player.

As luck would have it, that Summer had us back out here to Vegas twice more. Both times, I went to my aunts, and both times, Pat was over. The last time, Kevin was with me and he told me Pat was lusting for me. Needless to say, I was poo pooing the fact stating I told him upfront we were together and was blind to it.

Then, fast forward to December and Kevin and I were on the skids. Patrik had read some of my stories and called me telling me to come on out and be his guest at the Bellagio and to bring Kevin and make it romantic.

We went and when we got there, it was great. I love playing tournament poker and Kevin got into it also. Pat taught us some pointers and all the while he was teaching Kevin, I went off with Pat's wife and we did the shopping thing.”



“Hold up, he's married?”



“Yeah, but don't think it's an average marriage. What it is, is word trickled out Pat has an eye for the fellas and to insure he wouldn't be caught in a compromising position, his publicist arranged this three year marriage to some girl.

The way that went was he paid her something like five million and for the first two years, he wouldn't even let her live at his house. Then, a video showed up on YouTube, or somewhere, showing Pat's house and how he quote, 'loved living the single life'. That sure didn't go over with the contractual marriage chick or the casino paying the bills, so they moved to Monte Carlo where domestic laws are different and she now has a twenty year lease to live in a condo there which adjoins his.”



“So it's not a real marriage.”



“No, but there are children.”



“Are they his?”



“He's saying they're his, but she let that cat out of the bag with me when we were there shopping.

We were shopping for Christmas trinkets to give to each other and suddenly, she's looking at this leather coat. I asked, “Who are you getting that for?” and she said her baby's daddy. Well, it's not Pat's size, so I'm like, “You mean Pat? If so, that's too small.” and she said, “No, Pat's not my baby's daddy. We've never had sex at all.”



“Oh!”



“Well, the contract is up next Summer and not this upcoming one, but the next, so he wants us to hook up.”



“That's strange.”



“Yeah, but I'll tell you there are feelings there for me and I know there are for him too. I know he's the sort of guy when he gives his heart, it's given and I also know he's not about screwing around. He'll flirt, but he sure won't do anything like that because he's bound by too many contracts.”



“Like how?”



“Ok, stateside, he's got a contract with the Bellagio. They're wanting to buy that contract out, so that's great. Over in Monte Carlo, he's got a contract with a casino there, but it's not to a casino.”



“What's that mean?”



“Ok, let me lay it out to you because it's strange.”



“Ok”



“He's a professional poker player. In that world, you need bankroll. A way to do it is to win a lot, or be like a skipping stone where you move around from place to place and you have contracts where you go. It's sort of like pro singing.”



“Ok”


“Over there, the way that contract works is he's on contract to play for a sultan someplace to play poker in that one casino and nowhere else. He plays the Sultan's money and he gives that to the Sultan if he wins. If not, he's not out any money, but he does make twenty million for the life of that contract.”



“Man!”



“So, when that contract is up, he's through and doesn't have to be obligated there. He can come back stateside, or he can go elsewhere and use his own money to roll him along.

What you don't know about Pat is he's not with something long. He was a pro tennis player and then stopped. He then was a model and then stopped. Then he got into poker and he's now made his fortune doing this. He'll move on and I think once he's moved, it'll be to life of leisure snorkeling and deep sea fishing. He loves that and it's a common interest for us besides poker.

What's good with us is the attraction. The whole time Kevin was telling me I wasn't attractive to him anymore, Pat was telling me I was attractive. The whole time Kevin's telling me I'm a cheating bitch for flirting with Pat, he's out having two affairs. And Pat was there to catch the brunt of that argument and really let Kevin know he wasn't doing himself any favors doing things he was doing. Kevin's attitude was to tell him to mind his own business.”



“I understand that!”



“I do too, but what you're not hearing was Kevin and I were on the last thread of hope. We'd went through counseling and the entire time we were in counseling, I'm hearing what a chronic bitch I am and what a nagging pain in his ass I was...nevermind I'm footing the bills and he's my employee. Nevermind as my employee he was telling my employees not to listen to me because I had no ownership stake in any decisions.”



“Whoa!”



“Yeah, it's called mutiny. It's called I get beaten and have to be in the hospital and he doesn't spend six days with me in that six months and has an affair with a nurse who is giving me care.”



“Ooh”



“Yeah, I'm hooked to I.V.s, and this woman is injecting shit in them and I'm watching him out in the hall kissing her. Talk about scared because I'm completely at that bitch's mercy. Thank God she didn't want me dead!”



“You kept him?”



“Yeah, because he begged for forgiveness and said it'd never happen again. We recovered and a part of my recovery was going out in public and doing drag.

The first performance was the night I did that 'You Came' bed sequence in that video. While I was doing that, he was establishing another affair with a guy who unbeknownst to me, was one of the four who beat me.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah, so they have the affair and a lot of real shitty things happened. It was hurtful, painful, and just down right terrible for a lover to do it to another and when I finally caught on, I hired a detective who got the evidence and that's when I found out not only was it happening, but he was using his company credit card making it so I was paying for it!”



“What!”



“Yeah, it's called embezzlement. So what happened was one night, it came to a head because he came home with a shirt on which wasn't his and it was on inside out. That's when he told me he wanted to end it and he'd be moved out by the weekend and to not bother coming back to work because the employees wouldn't listen to me anyway.”



“What a despicable creature!”



“Yeah, and I loved him. What ended up happening was I chose vengeance and called people.

What I found out was they were both under investigation for growing and trafficking and Kevin had used his income to buy a house in a nice subdivision where it was being grown.

We had the confrontation and ended up having a helluva argument where I took him to the grow field and we burned it...with him making me think that was all there was.

Needless to say, he thought he had me fooled, but the investigators came and arrested him for the grow house. It took nearly seventy thousand to get a good lawyer...and that's my money.

We skate through and then that counseling where I'm told it's all my fault and that I'm a terrible bitch because I make him pick up the clothes he throws down in the floor and all sorts of things.

Then that took us out here to Vegas where we have a nice week and Pat and I flirt. Kevin blows a gasket and I'm a cheating bitch and that's when I give him a thousand dollar chip and tell him to get home, pack, and get out.

Then, I went to Hawaii for a week to give us room for him to get out and not to have arguments and I go home to find nothing packed and him in my face telling me to get out of HIS house and to go back to my own. We strike a bargain and he bought the house and I did move back to my house.”



“Hold up, I'm lost. I thought you were living in your house?”



“We were. In that month of December, a house I'd dreamed of owning all my life came open for three quarter of a million dollars. We bought it with my money and he's going to pay me back for his share of the down payment.

That was done because he also bitched in the counseling it was my house and I was a domineering bitch to him in it, so I thought it'd help only to be told to get out of his house my money bought and he'd pay me back. Except after the agreement got made, we argued and he punched me in the face. That's when I came up off the floor with murder in mind and beat the fuck out of my Navigator he bought and drove with my money as an employee car.”



“You were too good to him.”



“Yup, and yet, I'm the nagging chronic bitch, but that's not the end. We split up and I move to South Carolina. I got together with a guy in Hannibal who was a real leech and it was over in two days. Then, I bought the house and made the agreement with him to sell my business to him.”



“So you gave it to him with promise to pay?!”



“With contract of promise to pay. It was a good deal and netted me sixty million out of the deal, so I wasn't complaining.”



“Ok”



“Well, as accident amnesia happens, when it comes back it's usually when stress is down. On the day after I moved to South Carolina, I'm already with a guy and suddenly all the memories come back and that's when I'm on the phone a lot and the police chief back home admits he contracted the hit to destroy my face and kill me.”



“What!”



“Yeah, it made national news. He said it on his office phone at the station which is taped. We got the tapes and I sued the city. They fought and eventually, we settled out for a lot of money.”



“I'd say!”



“What ended up happening there was Kevin decided he didn't want the business either. He got a buyer who bought it for hundred million and I got to keep my program which I'm still selling.

So, I come back and while we're doing that, I find out inadvertently a whole lot of media in the area was for sale. I inquired and bingo, bam, boom, he and I are down together buying the media and making it so I control most of the advertising in that area, the news in that area, and a good portion of the news in the Midwest.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, it was cheap, so I bought it.”



“How cheap?”



“Let's just say for a seventeen state region, I own a station at least in each major market for seventy three million plus news papers and a lot of other rights.”



“That's a good deal.”



“Yeah, so what happened is we were on the way to go look at one station real close and we got to talking and communicating on a level which wasn't mean or hateful. We agreed to try forgetting the past and me understanding his point of view. It got us on safe ground, I thought.

But the little demons kept poking their head out and I found out he was expecting me to forget all of my past except him and to be his without questioning it. Needless to say, that led to a gigantic argument and finally, hateful words were said on both parts which just weren't going to be forgiven, so right in the middle of it, I said, “Ok, it's not going to work, you can't make me love you anymore and all we're doing is making it so I never want to speak with you again, so let's end it. You go your way, I go mine and if you step in my way, I'll run over you like the bug you are.”

He agreed and told me he was going someplace equally as nice to do what he wanted with what he wanted and in his own style. It's fine because I know where he is and he knows where I am and if we need each other, we know it better be on that person's turf and under that person's rules it's requested.”



“So it's like a divorce now.”



“Yeah. I hate it because parts of me still love him, but I know too much bad has happened.”



“That's a divorce hon. It's not fun, but at least you know you can go on with life.”



“That's a leading source of the pain in my song, “Baby, I'm sorry”



“That song is touching, moving, and just soulful downright to the point it's the blues in a way it's sad.”



“And, it's interesting because as I wrote it, the reasons flowed out of me and as it's played, the way it's received is in so many different ways which are just as sad, it's uncanny.”



“How?”



“For me, it's relationships. For Anna, it's an abortion. For Dave, it's his Dad. For my cousin Tommy, it's his marriage where she was doing drugs to the point she nearly sold their kids. For my other cousin, it's him thinking of his kids killed in a car wreck. For Pink, it's her thinking about the way her fame has affected her husband, but he thought it was her having me perform a song she wrote about how he treated her.”



“For me, it's about how my career has affected my family.”



“I understand. What's bad is I'm worried about how my Mom is going to take it. I mean, she's lost a child in a house fire, lost relationships, and it's possibly going to be taken as something she might perceive as me saying something to her.”



“Why?”



“She takes things personally. I write fiction and I can't tell you how many times I've had to explain to her it wasn't her I was writing about.”



She chuckled, “That's funny. Does she think that with all your newspapers?”



“I never thought of that! I'll bring it up the next time, but do you want to know what was funny about me buying the paper there?”



“What's that?”



“My Dad was the one who was unbelieving. He was like, the paper is Republican. It won't sell to a homosexual. The television station is NBC, they don't hire gays, so they won't sell to you.”



She laughed.



“I thought it was funnier than hell because he just didn't get it that we'd bought them already and all we were doing was going there personally to tell them.”



“That's funny.”



“I will tell you there've been a lot of pluses and minuses with it. I've had employees who refuse to work for a gay man. I've had employees who've thought because I'm gay, it's ok for them to just go nuts and go liberal above all measure in their writing. I've had papers which have had to have their hands held in all decisions and others who have thought because I'm gay, they've got free reign to do as they please.”



“What do you think about that?”



“Ok, here's my take on it. My point is if you're in the news business, it's best to print all of the news and don't slant it. Get it out there and let the reader decide. Instead, I've got editors running it their way and me having to call them on it...but as you know, once a paper is put out, you're not going to reissue it and get the reader to forget what they read.

What I will state is I pushed Obama hard on the media and I did that as a conscious decision and the aftermath of the election is what's pushed me stronger to being Democrat in my slant.”



“Why?”



“Ok, the day after the election, McCain who is all for the American worker is seen driving his foreign make car. Bang, shoot me in the heart Mr McCain, you're a fuckin' liar and you having that invitation only gathering at the private establishment is pure bullshit. It tells us you're a liar again and yes, I did push that in my papers, print, and television.

Since then, what's went on in Washington is beyond despicable. The Republicans pushed that bank thing through toting it was going to be transparent. Well, something got cloudy real quick. Then, when they want more bail out money, and we the tax payer decide we're going to want strings attached they decide they'll railroad the economy to push their agenda.

Well, as they stall, we fall and families get put out the door and get told states are broke, so food stamps and unemployment just can't be met.

That's in California by the way which is a Republican ran state. How soon they forget why they put the man in the office and suddenly, he's in there doing the same as the one he replaced.”



She smiled, “It's politics.”



“Yeah and I hate it all.”



“What do you have in your papers about the local?”



“In the local, we're trying to do all we can right now to save the readers. I'll tell you it's not working.”



“Why not?”



“Hon, it's an old school way of thinking being phased out by modern forms. People don't read the paper now because the local television news gives them the news for free. The local papers don't give all the news they used to because of costs. Readership is down, so them going to get police reports which are factual instead of news releases by the police chieves aren't happening.

I'll also tell you people are real sue happy. I'll tell you if we print a story about the local police performing racial profiling, you'd think the NAACP would be happy. Instead, we're getting sued.”



“What?!”



“Yeah, the reason being is I put in the story the man who is head of it is a retired local police officer. He was threatened his retirement if they complained, so now he's suing to save face.

What he doesn't know is my pockets are deep and my print is vicious. If he wants to target me, I'll target back and ask him some rather pointed questions all of which are verified in records I'm now paying thousands of dollars to get.”



“Why so much?”



“Ok, here's what happened. Lets say the police pull over cars driving through Huckleberry Park. You hear them broadcast over the radio, 'get that black guy'. To me, that's racial profiling when they very easily could've said, “The maroon Chevy is speeding.” They never say, the white guy.”



“That's racial profiling.”



“Yeah, so this guy from the NAACP stands up and says, “We've never had a problem, he's making it up!”



“What?!”



“Yeah, but get this. Let me take you on a tour of the City of Hannibal and you see if there's a problem. In the fire department, in the police department, in every office except one in city hall. In most of the other departments, you've got white employees. There are exactly two employees employed by the city who are black and they will tell you they got hired hired because they're both black and women.

But, don't let me stop there. Let's go to the post office. They had one black employee. He had ten years seniority over all the others and he's the one who got transferred. He was also the one on the longest route which when they transferred him, they had to hire four people to fill that post...all white.

In our county, there are exactly zero black employees. There's a hispanic woman at the jail, but she's part time with no benefits. Am I painting a biased picture here?”



“No.”



“I'm targeted by the black ex police officer operating the NAACP office there I'm targeting and painting a biased picture. I've reported the facts and not blemished it one bit.”



“Are there blacks in any places there?”



“Hon, let me tell you something my daddy told me. He operated a business for quite some time which had him in a lot of the major organizations there. He'll tell you the day I opened my business in 2001, the Chamber of Commerce voted not to extend me an invitation for membership because I'm gay...not because I'm an ex-con, but because I'm gay.

He'll also tell you he was on the board of those organizations at the time and while they'd ask him to come and perform non-paying duties, he was suddenly asked not to offer his gay son any opportunities to come help him in those duties.”


“That's just terrible!”



“Let me tell you how he handled it. He was exalted ruler of the Elks for three years in a row. In the Elks clubs nationally, that's unheard of because no one stays in that long and there's always someone else who they think can run it better.

With him, he ran it like he does his business. He expected dues to be caught up and when they were caught up, he rewarded them with dinners which were steak with all the trimmings and an orchestra for the dance afterwards.

They pulled that and he suddenly said, “Hang on a second. You're telling me a German that my half Italian kid who happens to be gay can't come because he's gay. You tell me my other kids who never want to do anything for this place they can come, but you want to go seek advertising boards to be contributed for our Toys for Tots program?! You better rethink this because I'm about to tell you and all of you to find someone else and walk out the door myself. They never rescinded, so he walked and the billboards I had reserved got the Marine's Toys for Tots program put on them.

Then, it gets better. They came to the paper and wanted us to put out a public service announcement gratis as a story that they're now allowing other races in their club...if they can be voted in and not get a black ball. They didn't say that, but I know that's how it works.

So, I print it up and put, “The Elks are now allowing in other races. If you qualify and are interested, you're welcome to pay the initiation fee and see if you can get the black ball. They are not allowing gays in, so nothing's changed there. THEN right under that story, I put the history of the black ball in the paper and right beside it, I put an editorial statement saying, “This paper reports the news factually and unbiased.”



She laughed, “Oh that's brilliant!”



“I've got a wonderful editor there. She calls me a lot and we have discussions on how the city is.”



“Let me ask this question. How many blacks do you have working for you?”



“Oh jeez, let's see because I'm going to ask you a question back. Do interracial count?”



“Ok, let's say yes.”



“As one of my new and bright anchors in Quincy, I've got an interracial guy who is just stunningly good looking. That kid is hot and he's got fans out the ass with his sweetness.

In the morning, we've got black anchor hosting the morning show with his white wife who is pregnant with their baby...so that might count. In the background there we've got four blacks.

At the paper in Hannibal, we've got seven blacks.

I'll tell you we've got them in other stations, but I've not been to all of them, so it's not real accurate. I will state we've got gays employed and we've got two Asian and one hispanic.

BUT, please let me state this because I want to be fair. All of those with the exception of that gorgeous interracial guy were there before I bought the place. That guy, I cherry picked because his photo just jumped out at me and yes, I hired a white guy and put him across from him also.”



She smiled, “Ok, that was honest. I like it.”



“Now, let me say this because I will bang my own drum with it.”



“Ok”



“At my sign shop, we have seven hundred people working. Of those seven hundred, a hundred and nineteen are black. Of the remaining, I've got a hundred and forty or more which are hispanic with green cards. I know they're legal because I put that paperwork in myself.

Of the rest of them, there are some thirteen gays and they're in some of the best positions I've got...not because I put them there but because for that job, they've got to work with women in tight quarters and women seem to think it's ok if another woman rub up against them or a gay man rub up against them, but put a straight man in there, and they have a conniption! And yes, that's both black, white, and hispanic women. And no, only two are black gays and one is a bisexual latin. There aren't any latin guys brave enough to come out of the closet in our town.”



“Why not?”



“Because the latin community in our town would probably beat them to death if they came out. However, I do think the latins living in my neighborhood would laugh like hell at that thought because they'd truck him to my house and insist he stay there.”



She laughed, “Why?”



“Ok, it's funny, but not. We've got what you call temporary citizens. They come in in the back of Uhaul trucks and they move into the houses in my neighborhood and yes, I own four of those houses they rent. They pay cash and they pay on time and I don't mind.”



“Ok, but why's it funny?”



“Here's how it's gotten to be. I'll tell you I'm a sucker for a hot latin guy. They seem to catch all the buttons it takes to turn me on and I'll admit I've gawked plenty at them.

With all the houses in the neighborhood, they walk up and down the alleyway a lot. I work in my yard a lot, so when I see a hot one, I whistle. They look and I've been known to give them a thumb up or a wink.”



“You're terrible”



'Yeah, but it's progressed. One day, there were two. One was fat and the other was hot. I whistled and both looked. The skinny one pointed at the other and I pointed thumbs down. The skinny one smiled and put on a show. You know I went closer and it began a flirtation.

Word spread and the thumb up and down thing spread. They started parading themselves to see who met approval and what's funny is the guy who operates the restaurants decided it'd be worth his while to have me pick the ones he kept there and move the others out to Colorado to construction jobs.

What happened there, is they'd roll in at night about one am and back this damned Uhaul down the alley going beep beep beep beep and making all my dogs bark and me come running to see what the hell was going on.

Well, what was going on is that man put up a bright light there and unloaded them. He's standing behind them pointing and if I put a thumb down, they went in the Uhaul and if it was a thumb up, they stayed.”



“That's just wrong!” She said laughing.



“Yup, but it's business for him. He has a restaurant and he knows if there's a fat one, tips are terrible and the young girls aren't there batting eyes and flirting. Young girls of course congregated in one area attract young boys vying for the competition, so you see his business thrive. Of course he wants me to pick them, but then again, he might've taken it as meaning I don't want them people living in my houses I rent to them.”



She laughed, “You're funnier than all get out!”



“Hon, there's not a whole lot to do in Hannibal. They sure don't have male strip clubs, so I've got to do what I can to be entertained.”



“What about your house in South Carolina?”



“Totally different. I'll tell you the community I live in there's no blacks. NOT because they're not welcome, but the houses there aren't able to be afforded, however there's one coming open for two and a half million if you're interested.”



“Dollars!”



“That's a steal. I'll tell you you'd have me over all the time because of the music room. The house used to be Naomi Judd's. She lost her money when she invested with that rat bastard Madoff. He made off with her money and there's a country song in there if I can find something which rhymes with rat bastard.”



She laughed, “Is it nice?”



“It's beautiful! I like it as much as mine and I paid two point four for mine. I've thought about buying it for my mama, so you should know it's nice.”



“What's the community like?”



“Gorgeous. It's fifteen hundred acres in behind a gate. The old guys patrol the place in golf carts and they serve as the police. We threw the Sheriff out of the place because he's my ex and is corrupt. So, they're the law.

What it is, is an old plantation which is all grown up with big trees and the houses are nestled in them.

Have you ever been to Hilton Head?”



“Yes. It's nice there, but expensive.”



“Well, we're right across the causeway from them. It's called the Colleton Plantation. I'll tell you my mama doesn't impress easily. She thinks she owns her own piece of God's country out on that cliff where they live, so she's not impressed by much except taller cliffs in Colorado...go figure.”



She chuckled, “You don't sound like you care for cliffs.”



“Nope. I'm afraid of heights and own a billboard company. Go figure. All I'll tell you is I hate ladders and am not wild about heights and both equal falling down. I'd rather stay down and not fall up. It's safer.”



She laughed



“About the plantation. The place is loaded with wealthy people. You go to the country club and you eat with two ex supreme court justices, famous retired people and lots of golf stars.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, my house was owned by a golf star. He designed the course and then moved when the corrupt Sheriff pulled over his then wife for drunk driving. He's since remarried a tennis star, so I wish him the best.”



“Oh!”



“On the drive in, you'll see Arnold Palmer's house. I'll tell you that thing is beyond big mansion. They shouldn't call mansions that big mansions. They should be called castles, but there's no moat. So, let's just say mine is a mini mansion compared to his humongo big mansion.”



“It's got to be big for you to carry on about it!”



“Mine is sixteen rooms not counting the garage, the apartment above the garage, the potting shed, and the golf cart garage.”



“You've even got a garage for the golf cart!”



“Yeah, it was there when I bought it. So is the Rolls Royce golf cart he left.”



“Wow!”



“Anyways, when you buy there, you get five acres minimum. Mama Naomi's place is thirteen acres and that woman landscaped it beautifully. It's got a waterfall with a slide built into it going into the swimming pool and under the waterfall is her music room which houses all her grammys gold records, and all that, but it's not antebellum like mine but Colonial with white brick and columns. It's got a circular drive and to the side are her gardens which I know she's just crying over because she loved them.”



“You got to know her?”



“Yeah, when I first moved in, I didn't know a soul. I thought I better put my dog on a leash so I walked her and out on a walk one day, we started talking about our dogs. The conversation led to us and she thought it was really neat I had no clue who the hell she was.”



“You didn't?!”



“Nope. It's funny because she's standing there singing to me all these songs and then, we went to my place because she loved mine and wanted to see inside, so once inside, she looked through my computer and saw all my music and saw indeed there were no Judd's or any of Wy's songs.

What's cool is we formed a friendship based upon cooking and what's funny is they're so Southern there it's funny.”



“What's that mean?”



“Ok, up home, you move into a neighborhood, everyone's looking out the curtains and if you're cute, everyone wants to know you and if you're not, they're all like, 'well look who the cat drug in'.

But, in the South, if you move in and you can afford that place, it's like, 'Hon, I'm making the neighbor a pie, I'll fish for details about how rich he is when I'm over there”



She laughed.



“So, suddenly, I've got this parade of old women moving pies at me like I'm the last non-diabetic in the place...”



She busted out laughing



“...and they're all over there asking questions and telling about Mitzy, Buffy, Poopsey, and I'm like, “Hey, I'm a dog lover, Gyp's behaved bring 'em over!' Well, they're like, “These are OUR grandaughters and they're in Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Dartmouth, and whatever the hell, and I'm like you KNOWINGLY named them BITSY, MUFFY, BUFFY, and all these dog names on purpose?!”



She laughed “That's hilarious.”



“Well, they quickly figured out I was gay because my place is right across the river from the Marine Corps Paris Island and I'm not paying attention and staring at the guys with binoculars when they jog by. Finally one asked, “Are you familiar with young Jarrett up the street? And I'm like, “No, why? Is he single?”



She laughed.



“It was a test to test the straight gene in me. He's a NASCAR driver and I'm supposed to know that.”



She laughed, “I know who he is.”



“I do too now. I mean, I bring home my Rolls and everyone's driving by slow because it's a million dollar car and they just can't believe I paid that much. But then, I brought home my Dakota with all the murals and it tricked out and the guys came over. THEN, I traded the Dakota for my RXT and had murals painted on it and low and behold, that brought them all out!”



“What's a RXT?”



“It's an International diesel made into a pickup truck. Wherever I go in it, everyone comes to see it.”



“I've never seen one.”



“Hang On”



I pulled out my phone and brought up the pictures. “Here it is. That's right after I got the murals painted on it.”



“It's huge!”



“Yeah, and it's one of those vehicles that wherever it's parked, it's like a car show. They want to see the engine, inside it and all the things I've done to it, so it's got to be kept clean and spotless at all times.”



“Do they accept you at the plantation?”



“Yeah, I'm richer than all of them, I think, so they talk about how the crazy rich guy throws away his money on gadgets alarms and all that.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah, but you know what? It's like I'm the Joneses and they try to keep up. Them old men there, if they see the alarm people at my house, they're over wanting to know what I've done next. I show them and then, you see the alarm people at their house next week. It's so funny because my cable man there offered me free cable not to get a satellite. He told me they'd all get one. I told him I wasn't, but I was getting my cable through the telephone people and you should've seen him skulk away.”



“What's the difference?”



“Ok, see my phone here?”



“Yeah”



“On my bill, I get my phone, long distance, cable, internet, and the cell phone all for a hundred and forty a month. It's nearly two hundred with taxes, but it's still cheaper than all the bills separately.”



“Oh man!”



“It's what they call a bundle. If you get a bunch of them together, they cut the rate. This phone here is an iPhone which is pretty full. It's got eight gigs of memory which I have movies, videos, music, and everyone I know's phone numbers in here. For the famous people, I put them in code, so no one knows.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, Elton is under Ivory Man because of the piano. Anna is under Dancer because of Private Dancer. You'd be under Train for Midnight Train. Pink there is under Yellow House because I can't believe how famous she is and living in a yellow house in the middle of a suburb in Las Vegas. Pat, well, lets just say he's under Fantasy unfulfilled.”



She laughed, “Who's under fantasy fulfilled?”



“There's no one. I'll have him there some day. I tend not to get along with exes, but I do have the number of one in here under his name. Danny. We get along great and I go to him for contracts. If Clive wants me to have a contract, I'll give it to Danny to hash out because Danny will get me all I want, need, desire, and probably will ever think I deserve.”



“Really, he must be pretty good!”



“He's my age and about to retire already. He's the contract man for Columbia TriStar Pictures. He negotiates those contracts with those stars and knows what they want and all that even before he takes it to them.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, some of them demand things in their dressing mansions and he gets all that put in there. He'll probably have Clive thinking I'm a diva before it's all done.”



She smiled, “You will want things in your dressing room and you'll learn to ask for it in the contract or you'll not get it. I'll tell you my contracts are rather lengthy because of it.”



“Really?”



“Hon, let me help you on that. If you perform someplace and your contract states nothing is to be in your dressing room, that's what you get...nothing. If you want make up, it better be in there. If you want water, it better be in there. If you want ANY THING, you'll want it in there.

Yes, some people get real stupid with it like seven McNuggets and four sticks of celery and three Chips o'hoy Cookies, and that stuff, but I'll tell you if you catch yourself turning to reach for something getting dressed and it's not there, then you'll find yourself going through eight checkpoints to get to your bus to dig it out and then, you'll have to drag that back with you and go through that eight checkpoints. It's just easier to have it already there and them paying for it.”



“I guess I never thought of it that way. Do you have all that in your contract here?”



“Yes.”



“Do we provide all that without problems?”



“Yes, there was one problem, but I complained to the management through my manager and they corrected it.”



“Can you go anywhere around here and not have a problem?”



“Yeah, it's not bad at all. People tend to leave me alone. But what I will tell you is your parking for your stars isn't good.”



“Really? Do we even have that?”



She smiled, “I sometimes wonder.”



“How is it done?”



“Out in back, there's a parking lot. I request reserved parking for my car and then, it's quite often taken.”



“That'll change. You might find a crushed car in your parking spot tomorrow.”



“Why?”



“I'll put a memo out you've complained about your parking space continually being violated and we're going to begin taking the matter seriously and appropriately. Everyone will look for your parking spot and when they see a crushed car there, they'll think 'Holy Shit! They crushed some poor dude's car over him parking in her spot! I'm not parking there!”



She laughed, “That's funny! Go ahead and do it!”



“Hon, sometimes the best way to conquer something is demonstrating you'll kill a fly with a cannon. Suddenly everyone realizes all else is petty to you.”



She smiled, “Ok”



I dialed Dave. “Yeah.”



“Gladys is complaining about people taking her parking spot out back. What she's agreed to do is leave it open tomorrow if we'll put a crushed car in it. Then, put a memo out telling everyone all offenders will be handled appropriately in the future. When they see the crushed car getting dumped there, they'll not park there in the future, but if someone does park there, do the messiest tow away they've ever seen and make sure lots of sparks are seen when they're dragging it away.”



He chuckled, “Ok Rhette. You up on stage with her?”



“Yeah, we're getting along wonderfully.”



I think everyone out here is wanting to leave. Why don't you come out and tell them goodbye and see if it's fine with her to go to her suite and talk.”



“Ok”



I turned to Gladys, “Everyone out front is wanting to leave. He says if I want to speak with you, we should go to your suite.”



“I'm ready to turn in hon.”



“Ok”



We got up and went to the seats. I thanked everyone for coming and then Dave and I went to the suite.



“Remember you've got a guest in there.”



“Damn! I forgot!”



He chuckled.



I went in and saw him laying under the covers asleep.



I went back out and saw Dave, “He's asleep.”



“Take another bedroom.”



“Ok, but he didn't seem like he was into things downstairs.”



“He's not been into performing in the theaters. I think he's best out on the road.”



“It takes hit songs to stay out there.”



“Yeah, but there's some issues there. It's a very dog eat dog world.”



“I've asked Gladys to be on the tour with me.”



“Ok, I'll let her know whenever that happens, it's not going to affect her contractual obligations here.”



“Tell Deb to get some help or don't worry about performing here again.”



“Her grace ran out. She was told that the last time. I was assured her meds were regulated so nothing happened again.”



“I don't like that policy. It makes someone having an anger flare up suddenly at the detriment of their career, but when someone tells me it's ok to sing something some way and then, it turns into an anger issue, I'm not going to let it ever come at me.”



“She put her foot in it. I know it might've embarrassed her you showed her more talent than she has, but people have that all the time.” He nodded to the bedroom, “I'll tell you that one is mixed up. It's not drugs, I think it's a boredom with life. He looks for the excitement, but it's not all exciting.”



“Life is what you make it. If you make it dull, you live a dull life. If you seek out what's fun, you'll make it better.”



“I'd tell you to go back in there, but who knows how he'd handle things.”



“I'm going back in. I'm going to wake him up and then, we'll go out for a ride. I want to learn what's making him tick.”



“That might not be so good. People don't like getting woke up.”



“Then don't sleep in my bed and ask to go there.”



“That's true.”



I went back into the bedroom and sat on the side of the bed near him. He continued to sleep and then, I caressed his cheek. He woke up and smiled, “You came.”



“It's my bed.”



“Then get in.”



“No, let's go for a ride. I want to get to know you.”



“Why?”



“Because if I get in that bed, all we are is a notch on each other's bedpost. I'm not going to respect you and sure don't expect you to respect me.”



“Where would we go?”



“To the airport and go for a plane ride.”



“How long would we be gone?”



“I don't know. How long will it take for me to get to know you?” I asked with a smile.



He smiled, “There's not much to know.”



I pulled back the covers and said, “Well, I learned your a boxer brief guy...and you're happy to see me.”



He laughed, “It's always like that when I wake up.”



“It'll definitely be that way if you find yourself waking up in my bed often!”



He got up chuckling and went to the bathroom. I picked up his jeans. They still had the tag in them. Fifteen thousand dollars for a pair of jeans, Jesus Christ!



He came out and I handed him his jeans, “Those jeans could've gotten you a thousand pair of jeans at Walmart*.”



“Not this brand.”



“Think about that when you're out of money. You'd gain fans who could say they wore the same jeans you did and could possibly get you an endorsement.”



“I can't do endorsements.”



“Can't or won't?”



“Where's your leather outfit?”



“It's Pink's. I borrowed it. It's got to be cleaned and then taken back to her. I've got three different ones like it at home I made.”



“Why'd you make them?”



“Because those few strips of leather cost her forty grand. My three cost me less than a thousand to make for all three...way less.”



“Why not make my jeans?”



“IF I did, you'd wear them?”



“Yeah.”



“Good, I'll make your jeans. Wear them in good health because it's going to take forever to wear them out.”



“Do you make all of your clothes?”



“No. I tend to buy what I like and I tend to make what I like that I can't find.”



“Why?”



“Because it challenges my mind. Knowing at the end of making something I made it with my own hands and it looks good on me makes me feel good.

Come on.”



I went out and Dave was sitting in the living room reading on his laptop.



“He's taking the day off tomorrow. Tell the world he's feeling under the weather.”



He looked over, “Why?”



“Because he needs normalcy. I'm taking him back to normal. I'm taking one of the planes and getting him to Missouri.”



“Tomorrow is Thursday, he needs to be back Friday.”



“We'll be back. By then, I'm going to have a duet with him.”



“Bring back some clothes.”



“I will.” I said smiling.



“Don't get lost. He's too valuable.”



“I'd say! He's a human being and looks better without clothes!”



We went out the door and into the elevator.



“Do you always talk that way to him?”



“No, sometimes I bitch, a lot of times I compliment him, but we tend to spar back and forth to show who is in power.”



“What's he to you? Your boyfriend?”



“No, he would be my ex step-son...if you want to get technical.”



“Huh?”



“His Dad and I were lovers when I was younger.”



“How long ago, you can't be over twenty five.”



“Thanks. I'm thirty five and it was twenty years ago.”



“Wow, you look good for your age.”



“You do too. You will until your fifties and then, the wrinkles will set in. Then, you'll allow the gray hair to caress your temples like you will my lips and you'll retire after celebrating fifty years in show business.”



“I won't make it that long. The money's not that good.”



“Wrong management.”



“You think?”



“If you're not in the twenty mil ballpark in savings right now, you are.”



“I'm nowhere near that.”



“We'll work on that.”



“How?”



“You had an album titled Insomniac. Are you?”



“Yeah.”



“So am I. When I'm not sleeping, I'm using the time to be constructive in some form.”



“Like what?”



“Writing gay romances.”



“Really?”



“Do you read them?”



“No.”



“Why not?”



“I've never thought about it. If I even bought a magazine the world would know.”



“Get a laptop. The internet is full of sites. You can read them and no one knows. Your privacy is paramount, but your happiness is detrimental to your future.”



We walked out of the elevator and I went to the desk, “We need a limo going to the airport. We'll be taking one of the Gino fleet to Missouri. I don't need a pilot.”



“Yes Mr Michaels.”



“Put cancelled and give rain checks for his shows tomorrow. We'll be back Friday.”



“Has that been approved?”



“I own the fucking place but just in case you ask David, it's approved. He got TOLD I was taking him!”



“Yes, Mr Michaels.”



I turned and walked out the front. I'm guessing he was following because I was getting to the nearest limo. I opened the door and he walked over and got in.



I got in and he laughed, “You told him!”



“People forget who pays the bills here.”



“You own all this?”



“Yeah, and a lot more.”



“You're rich.”



“Yeah, but you'll never see how rich I really am on any Forbes list.”



“Mafia?”



“Yeah.”



“Damn!”



“IF it makes you wet your boxer briefs, don't worry about it.”



“It's not that, I can't believe how you just blurt it out.”



“Confidence is a part of my being. I'm not going to run up to a fed and say that, but I'm not ashamed of it.”



“How'd you get in?”



“I didn't. I got drug in.”



“Why?”



“I loved Gino. When he died, he Willed me the ring which runs Kansas City. Dave up there manages it for me because I think he should've got it, but he's fine with how it's done.”



“How'd you and he get together?”



“It's a long story. I saw him around. He noticed me. We chatted at parties. Then, we started joking and my confidence took me to his house and I met his mama. She saw how I was about him and she pushed it. He didn't deny his feelings for me and that built us a platonic relationship where we helped each other because I was in a relationship.

When that relationship ended, I needed help and he helped me. It put us together as we lay our cards on the table and told each other how we felt. We tried it, but it didn't work, so I went to college and he stayed and ran the city. Because he ignored me, I broke it off. Life happened and before I knew it, he was dead and I had a city.”



“So you weren't together when he Willed it to you?”



“No, but we were still a part of each other's hearts.”



“Sounds sad.”



“Love isn't always happy.”



“I sure understand. What are you doing singing?”



“Because when I open my mouth, if I don't sing, the black woman inside of me comes out in wicked forms. It's best to let her be happy.”



“Is that what you think?”



“Hon, do you believe in reincarnation?”



“Yeah and no.”



“Why no?”



“Because there's a thousand people out there all saying they're Cleopatra or someone famous in a previous life.”



“I agree, but it's not that way with me. I've got some really good Dick Sutpin tapes which relax me and get me back to mine. So far, I've been no one famous...maybe it's meant to be for this life.”



“Who were you in previous lives?”



“A drummer in the Civil War. I died by freezing to death. A water girl in a hostel who made water for men's baths in 1415. She lived with her grandpa and a brother named Bucky. Her grandfather was the Captain of my civil war regiment and my boss at a factory I worked at here.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, Bucky was a lover of mine when I was in prison. We fucked like bunnies for nineteen days and then, wore each other out on each other.”



“You were in prison?”



“Yeah, it was because I fucked with someone below age. If the law had been different, I wouldn't've went to prison.”



“Why's that?”



“After I got put in they changed the law to say if you were within five years of the age of the person underage, you were ok.”



“Oh” He looked out the window and said, “I don't think they're coming.”



“Hang on. You'll be amazed at how fast I'll get this thing moving.”



I pulled out my cell. Dave answered. “Yeah Rhette.”



“I'm out front in a limo. We've been sitting here and just can't seem to get a driver. If I've got to hot wire it, I will.”



“I'll get someone there.”



“Thanks.”



I hung up and said, “Ring ring....explosion....then three two one that man is going to be running.”



About ten seconds later, the guy came running. He got in and said, “Mr Michaels, I wasn't told.”



“I understand. I showed that fucker at the desk some attitude. He showed it back. Let him think he got it off. I'll see he's at that desk for the next thirty years thinking he got it off.”



“Going to the airport?”



“Yes, and you might want to call ahead to see if they've got us a plane readied. If it's not, that man will be fired when my next phone call gets made.”



“Yes sir.”



I sat back in his arm. I turned and asked, “What's with the flirtation?”



“I've been known to explore the wild side.”



“Consider your explorations having met their destination. You definitely found the wild side with me. Now, either admit you're here and bask in the treasure you've found, or realize all your explorations aren't going to find anything else which is real.”



He smiled, “You're sure of yourself!”



“Let me tell you something. If you can't be sure, then fake it and act damned sure because soon, that feeling will take hold and you'll be so good at it, you'll definitely be sure. I've done it time and time again, but when I go into some situations, I'll tell you I back out.”



“SO, back to singing.”



“Here's how that went. All my life, I've sang. I'll tell you all my life, I've sounded like Anna.”



“Who's Anna?”



“Damn, we gotta get you around more! Anna is Tina Turner.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, but how it went was back in the eighties, I was stuck in a Stevie Nicks mode. I tried dressing liker her, looking like her and being like her, but she was the real thing and I was fake...until I went to a concert of hers which was so bad I'll tell you I could've went out there and did her act better than her if she'd just shut up and got off the stage.”



“Oh!”



“Here's how that concert went. She staggers out on stage and her back up singers were singing her the lines. One was a real good sound alike and if she'd just stood there and hung onto the microphone, it'd been just as good, but no...she was being reminded the lines by them singing it, so she'd sing them and by the third song, the mass exodus was walking out of the amphitheater.

I'll tell you I left when the show's promoter came out and announced due to the amount of people leaving, he'd give tickets to Journey when they came. The good thing there was I went to see them and it was one of the best concerts I've ever been to...loud enough to break your eardrums, but good.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, if you ever perform at Red Rocks out in Colorado, have your sound people sit out in the audience to get the sound down. What they think is good will deafen the audience.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, the accoustics there are so good it's like everyone's sitting next to the speakers.”



“Man!”



“Why aren't you out on the road?”



“The money's better at hotels.”



“Wrong. You've got too many people sucking your profits away. I'll tell you the way it should go. Your manager should take a look around and ask, “WHO are you? And WHAT is your purpose here? IF they say something like choreographer, they gotta go. IF they say they're assistant to anyone other than the manager, they've got to go. IF they are your nail man, they've got to go. If you've got a personal masturbator, they've got to go. All of those people make fifty grand a year at least of your money and I'll tell you there's such a thing as life without them.”



“Masturbator stays.”



“Not if I'm in your life they won't!”



“Oh!” he said smiling. “Ok, masturbator goes, but anyone by the name of Jack stays.”



I laughed, “If Jack is your choreographer, he goes.”



“I don't have a choreographer.”



“Masseuse?”



“No.”



“Get another manager, he's fuckin' you.”



“How do you know?”



“Management makes ten percent. Fifty thousand people paying fifty bucks is two and a half million. Fifty percent goes to the road show people and the other goes to you.”



“Promoters took a lot of it.”



“Hang on, let me make a call.”



I called Dave, “Yeah.”



“It's me. Find out what his numbers were on the road and who got his money. We want to have a full accounting of what went where. He's saying promoters got most of it.”



“Sounds like bad business to me.”



“That's what I think. If you've got to hang his manager upside down over a vat of cough syrup, get him to cough up those records. We're going on a hunt for a thief.”



“Will do.”



I hung up and he smiled, “You're funny.”



“No, it's serious! You might think it's funny, but when you need the money, it won't be there and the best time to find it is now when we've got the resources.”



“Ok.”



We arrived at the airport and went over to the hangar. When the car stopped, I was already opening the door.



“Mr Michaels, I'll get that for you!”



“No, that's ok, but thanks anyway. See if they've got a plane readied.”



We walked over and I looked at the planes.



He said, “There's a lot of them.”



“Yeah, apparently too many. He wants me to start using one as my personal jet.”



“You don't have one?”



“It's over there. It's twenty years old at least and needs to be moth balled. I need to go over and get my glasses from it to fly.”



I went over and opened the door and climbed up in. I got my glasses and came back out and shut the door.



When I got over, I went in the office and asked, “What seems to be the hold up here?”



“Mr Michaels, they've got no permissions for you to fly one.”



I pulled out my phone. Dave answered, “Yeah.”



“Perhaps you should put a memo out to every fuckin' employee we've got I'm entitled to the best treatment and AM able to touch any of our property as you! Call out here to the hanger and tell the son of a bitch I have rights to use the God damned planes!”



“What?!”



“Forget it, I'll jack the fucker's jaw and let him know I'm making my permission known.”



“Hang on!”



I hung up and reached across the counter and drug the guy to me with his tie. “Listen up, the phone call is coming to tell you I'm the owner of all these planes and put the money in the account for David to sign your fuckin' check. Get me the God damn plane readied or your fired when that call comes.” His phone rang and I said, “Answer the son of a bitch, it's Dave.”



I let go and stepped back. He answered, “Yes sir. Yes sir. I didn't know sir. I've been made aware most rudely. No sir, I like my job very well sir. I will sir. Good night.”



He hung up and looked at me, “I'll have your plane readied.”



“No, get me that Constellation out there readied and consider that plane mine now. Whenever you refer to it on the books, refer to it as Gino1 because Gino1 is now retired.”



“Yes sir.”



“There's a reason I fly Gino1 and no one else. Remember that.”



I turned to the limo driver. “You can go ahead and go now. I think he'll never forget tonight.”



I turned to Enriches. “Demand respect always. If you don't get it, see you get it. When it's not given, let them know the real chain of command that you always sign their paychecks with someone else's signatures.”



He smiled. “You're mad!”



“I'm cooling off now.” I turned, “Stay here, I'll go help preflight the plane.”



I went out and said, “You man the clipboard. I'll preflight it and you can check them off.”



“You don't have to do that.”



“I'm doing it. Here's the rule with my plane always. When it comes in, you check it and preflight it for everything once it's cooled. That way, it's ready for me to fly at a moment's notice.”



“Yes sir.”



“My name is Rhette. Remember it. Sirs to me are guards in prisons. I'm not wearing a uniform and babysitting punks, I'm a man with a name.”



“Yes sir...I mean Rhette.”



“I'm normally easy to get along with until a bunch of people don't know the power I've got. Then, it pisses me off.”



“I wasn't told.”



“You know now. Tell everyone you ever work with what tonight brought and you tell them I won't be as nice ever again. It's bullshit.”



When we got around, I went in and checked everything. He marked it for preflight and asked, “Where are you going?”



“Hannibal, Missouri. If we have problems with weather, our back up will be St. Louis.”



“Ok”



“We're going to follow I-80 across and then head Southeastward from Omaha.”



“Ok”



“We'll be flying back early Friday morning.”



I went in and said, “We're ready. We'll be home in two and a half hours.”



He smiled and followed me. When we got in and buckled, I said, “We'll go back once it's on auto.”



We taxied and got clearance relatively fast. As we took off, I said, “It flies good.”



“How'd you learn how to fly?”



“Gino got control of a airplane manufacturer and needed a plane. He got one and then was appalled it'd cost us eighty grand a year for a part time pilot. We took lessons and went up and taught ourselves how to fly. Then, he got ahold of someone who got he and I hours flown to qualify for jet. Since then, I've taken the test for jets, choppers, and even an experimental rocket propelled one. I'll be glad when we have that available.

What you're going to find funny is when I got put in prison, they confiscated my pilot's license. Don't ask me why, but it took three years to get it back. Finally, it took a special directive from our Governor to the FAA stating I'm no risk whatsoever.”



When we got to cruising altitude, I engaged auto pilot and motioned for him to go back.



“What's going to happen if it messes up?”



“If it messes up, we're in a world of shit. You'll feel a big bang which will make you a part of that wall up there and then, you're dying moments will be the debri, fire, and a lot of sensations of air. Then, you'll see a white light and my ass going up first demanding to be let in.”



He laughed, “Will it happen?”



“It better! They wouldn't let me in last time and made me go back!”



“Really?”



“When I got raped in prison, I checked out on them. They brought me back.”



“You were raped?”



“Yeah, it wasn't fun.” I changed the subject, “What's your Mom like?”



“Why do you ask?”



“Because I know what your Dad is like. I want to know about your Mom.”



“I love my Mom. She's great.”



“What was it like growing up there in that house?”



He smiled, “It was ok.”



“...but haunted.”



“How did you know?!”



“They did a story on your Dad at one time and had an interview with him. In the background, I saw the ghost walk through and thought, wow, that guy is a babe, but he's a ghost!”



“You think it's a guy?”



“Yeah, and I know why he's a ghost. He thinks in the afterlife he's going to have to face up to what he did.”



“What did he do?”



“He lied and played two women's affections. He doesn't realize it's a joke between them now, but they can't bring him across.”



“Really?”



“No.” I said, “I'm switching subjects. Ok?”



“Sure.”



“When we get back home, don't expect me to treat you like you're someone. I will tell you we're going shopping but that's to get you some clothes.”



“Why?”



“Wearing fifteen thousand dollar jeans while performing in a theater where everyone's going to notice things, it's best to have clothes on people can recognize and say, “Wow! I know where he got that!”



“Don't you think it's a sign of status?”



“No. Elitism, yeah. What you need right now is people leaving your concerts thinking good thoughts and that starts with you having them identify with you. Once you get word out like that, you'll understand those people when torn between your album and lets say mine, they're going to pick yours because you were such a nice guy and were so polite.”



“Ok, why wouldn't you want them to buy yours?”



“I'll get my records sold the old fashioned way. I'll have so many hits upon it they'll buy it.”



He chuckled, “Ok”



“What I'm going to say is something you should know upfront.”



“Ok”



“When we go home, we're going to probably break someone's heart. He wants me and as much as I could ever want him, I see us as two highways which are together now and then breaking apart. I know it and would rather have him as a friend than a lover.”



“Why?”



“Because the lives need to be split. He's only going to accel if he's doing his thing and I'm going to do mine doing mine. Yeah, he'll be treated like a son I never had, but I don't want us tied like lovers.”



“And us?”



“You and I are different. I know if I went out in drag you'd suddenly have all sorts of media attention. What you need to know is I'm planning on being honest.”



“What's that mean?”



“It means before my concert airs on television, there's going to be a documentary on drag queens and then, you're going to see me showing those videos where I've performed previously. I want people to know I'm a guy and then, I want them to see how this guy becomes a gal. That way, when I go out on stage and throw them the goods, they're going to be asking, “Where the hell did he put it and where in the hell did he learn to sing like that!”



“That's going to be tricky.”



“Yeah, but what it does right away is it takes all the power away from those who already know and it puts it back in my hands.

What you don't know is I already know of at least two drag queen performers who pulled it off. The only difference is I'm not going to watch my career go up in smoke when it hits the tabloids.”



“Me being linked with you could be bad for my image.”



“Or it could be honest. I'll tell you they love to hang a fraud, but they sure love it when someone tells them the truth. Look at El, his career didn't suffer.”



“No, but I don't have that many hits.”



“And you don't need that many hits. I'll tell you if you admit you're gay and you love someone, you've got the upper hand and women will think they can convert you back and men will be thanking God their wife doesn't stand a chance with you. Your concerts still get them laid and they'll still take them to see you...and yes, there's still going to be some who will flock to you because you're gay.”



“Really?”



“Look at Cher's concerts. She caters to gays and they love her. Yeah, she accepted a daughter who is gay and that helped, but in the end, it was her talent and strength who won her fans.”



“I'd like to think that.”



“Hon, let's do a billion dollar challenge.”



“Huh?”



“Give me ten years of being my lover in public and in private and I'll give you a billion dollars at the end of that time period if you don't already have that in the bank. If you do, then fuck you because I'm not going to pay you for what you already know.”



“Let me think on it.”



“That's fair.”



“What would I have to do?”



“Ten years. That's not a Madonna ten where we don't share bedrooms, that's not a fake ten where we don't share addresses, that's a real ten where we build it, we live it, and we're honest with America you're hot and I'm a queen.”



“I don't know if I can have a career like that.”



“Why not?”



“You don't know my contracts.”



“Where are your contracts?”



“At my parent's house in the safe.”



“Call and get them sent. We'll go over them with a friend of mine and we'll see what they're about.”



“Who's your friend?”



“He's my ex lover who is a contract lawyer. He's the best there is and he'll tell us what the loopholes are and what we can do. How much longer do you have in your contract?”



“I don't know.”



“Bullshit, if you don't know, you're an idiot. If it's not in there, then I'll have you out of it tomorrow.”



“It's with my Dad.”



“What?”



“He gets most of my money.”



“Hang on.”



I called Dave. “Yeah Rhette”



“Call his Dad and have him brought to Nevada. I want his contract and I want that man in front of me. I'm calling Sal and I'll have him there too. The man has him in some sort of bondage papers and it has no end.”



“Ummm...you don't want to do that.”



“Sorry, I'll get it done myself. You slink off to the corner where you better be when I need you.”



I hung up and called Sal's number, “God Damned Rhette!”



“You're up, don't bitch at me!”



“Don't you ever sleep?”



“Nope, I need you.”



“What for?”



“Dave's been told to call you because I want someone brought to Las Vegas to stand in front of me. I also want the contract out of his safe and I want you there so we both are aware of what's happening.”



“Can you talk about it?”



“Nope.”



“The person there?”



“Yup.”



“Ok, I'll call David. What does he say?”



“He says I don't want to mess with it. Now, you should know there's some sort of bondage contract involved with no limits.”



“What?!”



“And his kid is getting hardly no income out of it and all the moneys are going elsewhere.”



“I don't like it, what's the other side of the equation?”



“His kid is gay and I'm about to go into a ten year agreement with him, but I'm not going to do it if his daddy stands to get all the money. I'm NOT going to make his daddy a billionaire and then have to pay the kid another billion on a side bet.”



“Oh!”



“Any word on my island?”



“It's slow going.”



“Have you gotten the water turned on?”



“It's running on through all of them.”



“Break the cast iron in the elbows. That's where it breaks when it's frozen. I'll tell you how you can do that real believable.”



“How?”



“You take a torch and you heat that fitting up to red hot. Then, you score it with a hacksaw blade. Then you heat it red hot again until it's about orange and then, you slap dry ice to it. Suddenly, that thing's going to shatter where you scored it.”



“Oh!”



“Sally, that's how you take a big old cast iron furnace out of your basement in pieces without taking a sledge to it also. I'd much rather do that than swing a sledge for several hours.”



“Me too!”



“The advantage is when it cools, no one's the wiser it was scored or heated. Yeah, it has a reddish tinge to it after it's heated, but if water gets to it, it'll rust just as fast.”



“I'll tell 'em. Do you need me out there?”



“Find out if I'm getting the man brought before me or if we have to go other routes.”



“How far?”



“You tell me and we'll both know. You know what I want and I'm not going to lose money twice.”



“Ok, I'll call Dave.”



“Thanks Sal.”



“Who was that?”



“Head of the underworld.”



“What?”



“When you do something big possibly involving someone else's turf, you want the guy on your side instead of trying to get him on your side afterwards.”



“What are you going to do?”



“I'm going to have them bring your Dad and that contract to Las Vegas. Then, I'm going to read the contract and find all the loopholes through it. Then, if it's a normal contract, I'll know if and when it ends and what it takes to break it.

It could be, he's already broken it on his part and you're entitled to get out of it. Or, it could be you've not told me something he's thinking about using as a trump up his sleeve and I'll have to not act shocked.

When that happens, I'll act damned good and then, I'm going to use all I can get on him against him and when it happens, you'll see me break him. If not, we'll go into a hard ball position where I'll tell him what I'm doing and tell him to get fucking real if he thinks he's going to sue you over it. If that happens, I churn up my media and begin putting out the information I've got against him to ruin him in America's eye.”



“He has something.”



“What is it?”



“I was caught with another guy.”



“And?”



“The guy said it wasn't consensual.”



“What were you doing and what was he doing? Where did it happen? And were there any other incidences?”



“He was sucking my dick. He stayed over at my house and yeah, there were a lot of incidences of it happening. We were lovers from the age of eleven until it was found four years later.”



“Any love letters from him to you?”



“All that was taken from me.”



“Who's the guy? Have you seen him since?”



“His name is Bill. I know where he is and who he's with now.”



“Does he know what you've went through over it?”



“Yes, but he's with a girl.”



“It doesn't matter. There's a time and a place to make things right. Did he ever approach you again sexually?”



“No! No, he wasn't allowed around me again.”



“Ok, I know now. Let me make some calls and see if I can pull a few rabbits out of my hat.”



“Don't mess with him.”



“I'm not. You certainly don't know how I play. All I needed to know what the hold was he had on you and now it's time to put a hold over your Dad like he's thinking he's got on you.”



“There's someone.”



“I know there is. What you don't know is I already know there's two someones. The first one's name is Brook. All I've got to do is make the call and I'll have her there.”



“Really?”



I opened my phone and called Sal, “Yeah Rhette. Listen, I've spoken with Dave and he's not happy about this.”



“Dave doesn't run my city. I do.”



“I know that, but here's what I'm doing. I'm calling it like you want, but I know why Dave's not happy and you need to listen.”



“Sal, let me save you breath. You're upset and he's upset over Miami. Let me tell you something. I want Miami there. You tell Miami whatever the amount is, I'm paying it up to one billion. You tell them I want receipts and you tell them I want to own that fucker by the time this is over.”



“Oh!”



“I am going for the mega fuckin' of the century with that man. I want the deal arranged so when he's standing there, I'm signing on the line to own him in front of him so the moment he spouts off to me, I can lower the boom on him and use it to start swinging in home runs.”



He laughed, “You are too damned much like Gino! Dave keeps telling me this, but I work on one level and you work on all these levels up there I don't even see. Now that you're telling me, I'm seeing it and I'm laughing my ass off.”



“It takes knowledge. You need to remember when you see tidbits and smidgeons of something to hold onto that because that's the day it's all going to come home to roost.”



“How did you know Miami was involved?”



“Rocket science. He and Willie were too close for a moment there. One fought the law his way and the other graced out the door the other and suddenly, he was in Miami. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure who financed him and how the hell he escaped out the back door. What it does take is an inner knowledge how we work and when you follow the trail of the snail, you see.”



“You're dead on.”



“That's why I want to have the meeting Sally. That's all. You know me, I didn't break into Vegas down in their mess, we went North so we weren't seen as a threat and you know when I even thought about going up into your mess, I called you to let you know.”



“I know and I appreciate it. It keeps problems at bay.”



“Dave's not thinking as far ahead as me and he's pissed at me for thinking I'm running headlong into a collision.”



“Ok, so you want the son and are willing to buy the Dad to get him.”



“I want a ten year matrimonial contract but not between a man and a woman. I want it between he and I. At the end, if he's not earned a billion and got it in his account, I'll pay him that billion. What it does is it gets me secured out there so I can be seen as taken and not as a threat to any woman or her man.”



“That's smart.”



“That's why I want him and he's content because he now knows he's been systematically fucked in contracts.

I'll speak with Dave, but you now know Dave doesn't work in ways Gino taught.”



“That he doesn't. You had me worried, but now I'm seeing it all coming together and like it.”



“Where we have a problem is that man's going to try to play me and I'm going to have to break him. I'm lining it all up so he knows I'm not above breaking him in order to get what I want.”



“That's ok, I'll call Miami and get it arranged. They need the funds, so it's certainly going to be fine.”



“Ok, I'll call Dave and make sure his sheets aren't wrinkled so he can sleep better tonight.”



He laughed, “You two are funny. I'm glad to see you being the way you are.”



“Thank you. You're a champ Sally.”



“You know, no one but Gino's mama called me Sally.”



“That's where I learned it. There's a halo over her tombstone and my heart over Gino's.”



“I sure hear that and now I'm learning to trust how you operate. You're complete and don't leave any loose ends...and that's the way Gino operated.”



“As soon as you have a number from Miami, let me know. I know it's going to sound like a lot, but I don't think it'll be over a hundred million.”



“That much?!”



“They will want interest. I'll tell you that.”



“My God!”



“Of course, if you can talk them down, do so, but if not, don't be real shocked when they tell you it's a fortune. You just tell them I want receipts as to what they've been paid out of this kid's pockets so I know exactly how bad to rack his daddy.”



He chuckled, “Ok”



I hung up and said, “Jeez.”



“What's all that about?”



“Debts. Your daddy owes Miami, so he's fucking your career to pay it. What I'm going to do is pay your daddy's debt and buy him. Then, I'm going to let him know with Miami sitting there I bought his debt and now own him so what I say goes.”



“Oh! What's he owe the money for?”



“He was in trouble with the I.R.S., and borrowed from Miami to pay it. This way, he got to keep all he has and their way, the I.R.S, would've embarrassed him and taken all you guys owned.”



“My Dad's been taking my money and paying them?”



“Yeah.”



“What's going to change?”



“First of all, you're going to stop being your daddy's whore. That shit stops. He's going to stop blackmailing you to do it and he's going to get his own ass out there and sell it to make me some money. I think it's safe to say when you come out of my theater, your daddy will go in.”



“He won't like it.”



“He's got no choice. The balls already in play and I'm not stopping until I've got the man I want.”



“You want me?”



“Yeah, so don't get all googoo over it.”



He smiled, “Why not?”



“Because there might be a time when you feel used. I'm trying to correct wrongs and gain an advantage from it. I hope you're not offended.”



“I'm not.”



“What we're going to do is this... for this ten years, I want us together. You're your own guy and I am too. I want a relationship and hopefully, when this is over, you'll see you do love me and we've got something which is real.”



“Are you going to work at it too?”



“Yeah, but you'll hear me do business like this and wonder if we ever get time for us, but you have to understand this is how I work.”



“I understand.”



My cell rang. I looked at it, “Yeah Sally.”



“Ninety three million dollars. They'll have a full accounting with them, but they're sure happy about it.”



“That sound reasonable. Have that marriage contract with you.”



“You're for sure about that?”



“Yeah, consider it a done deal. Ten years with an option at more if he's interested.”



“Oh!”



“It's worth it to me. It makes me marketable and able to do some big projects.”



“Ok, when are we doing this?”



“How about one pm Vegas time on Friday. It'll give everyone time to get there and me time to get into cook everyone something afterwards.”



He laughed, “You're making it a treat to come out there.”



“I hope so. Now that I've got a number, I'll call Dave. He'll be surprised how I'm going to deal this.”



“Ok”



I hung up and dialed Dave. “Yeah.”



“Here's what I know. At one pm Vegas time on Friday, we're holding a meeting with Miami, that man, Sal, me, you, and En here.

At that time, we're giving Miami ninety three million to buy out En's Dad's debt to them. Then, what we're going to do is we're going to make En's Dad sign a contract to take the theater over from En when he leaves to go out with me. He's going to take that contract and he's going to make our star board shine.

We'll announce signing him at twenty million a year for ten years and we're going to bottom out that interest and take half of it from him for our repayment.

Is that fine with you?”



“Damn! You just swung all that?!”



“Dave, you gotta have more faith than me. You forget I know how this works and you forget your Dad taught me how to work it so I'm not leaving hurt feelings.

Miami is ecstatic and all we've got left to do is for me to call Brook and you to dig up all the surveillance you can on him so when we go for the breaking of him, we'll have it.

What you need to do is make it so appealing out there to that man that he thinks he's the bride in this marriage contract.”



“Marriage contract?”



“Yeah, me and En for ten years. I'll explain it in person. It's rather complex, but it's business first, pleasure second, but for real.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah, as you see, I went into the ballpark with a bat, I'm swinging home runs.”



“You know, I really am amazed here.”



“Dave, please.”



He laughed, “I love you dude.”



“I love you too. Now you know once again when I step in, we're going to get business done and things are going to be ok.”



“Ok, I'll let you be and go to bed now.”



“And sleep safe since I took out all them wrinkles so your little head wouldn't have bad dreams of me being in a train wreck. Now take the mint and shut the hell up!”



He laughed, “Yeah Dad.”



“Thank you. I love you too.”



“What's on your itinerary there?”



“Teach him how things are with me. I want him knowing what it's like being around me so when we get this all going, he's knowing I'm for real.”



“That's good.”



“I'll get off here. Do what you can about Gladys' parking space.”



“I'm already on it.”



“Good. Bye now.”



I hung up and turned around and said, “He's happy.”



“I've got a question.”



“Sure.”



“How does it work with you and him?”



“The way it works is he manages everything. Everyone thinks he's the boss and power. What they don't know and the feds don't know is I possess this ring. This ring contains the power.

We play it that way because the feds naturally would look toward him since he was Gino's son. It would normally go that way, but the way it went with the setting up of power in Kansas City is the ring is the power.

With possession of the ring, I've got power, but someone can't just take the ring and say they've got the power, it has to be given in a ceremony or Willed. If it's Willed, then how it goes, when the person accepts it, there's a ceremony and power is handed over.”



“So, why doesn't everyone know you've got it?”



“Dave was the executor of Gino's Will. I was in prison when Gino died, so he wore it. Everyone thought he got it and since there weren't any major changes in the way things ran, no one was alarmed when he took management. He had the ring, so no wars were fought.

When I got out of prison, Dave didn't run right to me and hand it to me. I appreciate that because I would've laughed in his face and been a real hateful bitch about it.

Instead, I got a chance to become my own person and when I did go to Kansas City, it was a surprise, but wasn't something I wanted, therefore, Dave and I came to this agreement and I let him run it and people think he's got the power, while I hold the ring.

Yes, I do overrule him on things, like you just saw, but he's learning when I do, it's because I'm doing things the way I know Gino would've handled them and want to demonstrate to him I'm capable and he needs to count on me when those times happen.

He's learning to trust, but I understand his worry because I'm the same way when someone wants to take that control. With him, I trust him completely, but with me, he doesn't trust as fully as he should. We're teaching him, so that's good.”



“What's back where we're going?”



“Where we're going is Hannibal, Missouri. It's where I was raised and it's home base for me. My parents live there and my family live around there...except for my sister and she's out in California.

What you DO need to know is aside from all the Kansas City stuff, I've got my own money. There's way more than all we're talking about tonight and I could easily buy your Dad's debt and hand it to him as a gift, but he doesn't teach lessons that way about how a family operates.

My business was in Hannibal. I've got a house there and yet, I'm building a mansion there, so I'll still have plenty of connections to the area.

With me, there's houses all over the place. I've got an estate of my own in Kansas City I'm about to sell and I've got Gino's house which I was Willed.

In South Carolina, I've got a mansion. I left Hannibal for it and now, it's called my base of operations.

With me, when I get attached to things, you see me really attached to them. I love the house in South Carolina, so I'm having a copy of it built in Hannibal and we're still deciding if I can legally build a copy of it on an island we bought me in New York City harbor. It's technical there, and when you heard me discussing with Sal how to damage a house by breaking water lines, it was those up there so we can get what I want no matter what.”



“Why?”



“Because the island was bought for fifteen million and is so cluttered with houses and buildings, I have to find a way to get rid of them.”



He smiled, “Why'd you buy an island?”



“That answer would be 'it's technical' too. You see, Sal operates New York. He's a great guy and I love him to death, but he could view me as a threat if I'm in the city.

Now, should I have decided to live in the city, I'd make him comfortable with having me there, but it's just real scratchy itchy for me to be operating Kansas City and be living in New York.

He understands how it is with Dave and I, so we get along with it. He's doing all he can to help because you have to understand he has a reputation with his men to uphold also.”



“Oh! Ok! I was saying, I've got a place in New York, so I thought you ought to know.”



“Great. Do you mind if we use it while the mansion is being built?”



“Sure.”



“I need to ask something of you. You're going to think me pushy, but I'll explain it before I ask so you know I'm not being pushy.”



“Ok”



“Let's go back up front. These lights are going to dim in a moment telling me it's time to make a heading change and I want to be there.”



He nodded and we went up front. After we'd gotten fastened in, I said, “You look like you belong there. I bet with a white shirt on and a tie, you'd look like a pilot on a major airline.”



He smiled, “I've always wanted to fly.”



“We'll get you taught. It's easy.”



I looked at the controls and altimeter and then looked at our GPS locator to see where we were exactly. I pointed, “This is where we are in the country. As we fly, you'll see our location move.

What you'll learn is what we do is we get us on a heading and what I like to do is I like to stay over major interstate highways. That way, if we have to go down, we've got a place which is paved to land. It's a bitch on a plane, but we tend to stay alive if it has to happen.

With this flight, we left Vegas and I took a heading of getting us up to I-80 North of Denver where we turned and followed it. Now, we're heading to Omaha up there where all those lights are and then, we'll turn to the Southeast where we will go to Hannibal.

What you have to pay attention to here is on this screen. It's the weather map composed of all the radars around the country. There's a storm going from New Mexico to up by Detroit, so we'll hit the North side of it. It's going to be a little bumpy possibly, so that's why I want you up here. Back there, turbulence affects you more because you don't know when it's going to happen. Up here, you have more of an idea that I am in control, it's just that it could be bumpy.”



“I'm glad you told me.”



“What I will tell you is if alarms sound, it's because we've got alarms on all these. You'll see the auto pilot maintaining our heading, but if we hit pockets, the altitude changes and the altimeter screams it's alarm. The auto pilot corrects, but the altimeter doesn't know, so I've got to let it know.

I'm not trying to alarm you, it's just the way it is in severe circumstances. You'll find out when we're heading into a storm the winds get scary on the front side of it. They might go up and down one second and then, suddenly be going left to right another. All that is happening because the storm is moving at one speed colliding with the air in front of it and all of that has to go somewhere.”



“You make it understandable. I like that.”



“What I'll tell here and now is I've been in about every situation you can imagine in these things. I had a plane burn on me in Miami and I had one damned near lose a wing in Kansas. In both instances, it took me remaining calm and getting myself out of it alive.”



“What happened with the time you nearly lost the wing?”



“First of all, this was when I was a whole lot younger and dumber. Back then, I thought these things were able to take a lot and not get damaged. I was wrong.

With that situation, I was doing aerobatics and put pressures on it that it wasn't designed to take. I went up for a stall and then came down doing barrel rolls. The speed was too much and the forces ripped the wing.

With a rip, it starts off with a bang and you get vibration. Then, as it continues to rip, the vibration becomes a shuddering until it's to the point your controls are shaking so bad you can't hardly hold them. That day, I held on, but I'll tell you my hand was pounding me in the nuts about a hundred times a minute, but when you've got to hold on or die, you hold on and you swallow the pain.

In that situation, I was blessed because there's an airport out at Manhatten, Kansas which is wonderful. I got it slowed and instead of calling a Mayday, I calmly told them I had a malfunction and needed clearance. They got it for me and I managed to get the fuel switched from the wing to the other and land it with the wing damned near bent back at a forty five angle and down.

When it landed, it drug which instantly caused it to want to pull that direction and it took all I had to get it to go straight down the runway and stopped.”



“Man!”



“I'll tell you the people there were really surprised when I pulled up dragging the wing. That was before cell phones, so I had to call from the pay phone there to get another plane brought and explain to Gino I'd ruined his plane.”



“What did he say?”



“He was wanting to know if I was ok and I told him I was, but my nuts were sore. What you don't know there was me saying I was hurt in any way to that man sent him into panic mode and had him wanting me to get to a hospital.”



“You should've.”



“Do you really want to know what they do for sore nuts at a hospital? I'll tell you they make it so everyone in the emergency ward come and look at your equipment and then, they want to put an ice pack on them...which shrinks the equipment to the size of a babies and then, of course, they all want another look. I'll tell you I can do that myself and not have it embarrassed.”



He laughed.



“Just the same, you should of seen the bruising! I'll tell you it looked like Mohammed Ali took a round at the whole area, but I'll tell you I was damned happy to be alive.”



“What happened with the fire?”



“The fire was entirely different. I can't tell you what I sucked into the engine, but Thank God I was still on the ground. I'll also tell you that plane was a Grumman so that should tell you why there aren't any on our fleet.

What happened there was I was alone. Thanks God because it was scary and if you've been in a Grumman, you know they're like twenty feet up off the tarmac where the door is.

With it, I taxied out and all was well. It was a busy day, so it took nearly forty five minutes to get clearance. Then, when I got clearance, I was at the end of the runway, and suddenly, I had whoosh bump which instantly tells you you've got a problem.

The tower tells me I'm on fire and I calmly tell them I'll pull it off to the side to get it put out and do. Then, for some reason, that engine just went haywire and decided it had to go full throttle. I'll tell you I wasn't even on the throttle on that side and had killed it, but killing a jet isn't real cool because what that is, is taking away the fuel.

If the fuel is still going to it, then you've got a problem. It was and it went full throttle so you have this extremely huge whine and you've got it sucking in air like a motherfucker and you've got a jet wash blowing anything like vehicles all over the place. In this instance, it was aimed towards a fence row and blowing fire out at it. It caught on fire which had them worried about the tail of the plane.

I'll tell you I hit emergency shut offs by that point and had already gotten to the tail and had the doors open to activate the evacuation. I didn't even wait, I ran and hit that ground rolling and running away from it.”



“Man! Were you ok?”



“Yeah, I was pissed! I called Dave and told him I wanted a plane down there and a good one this time!”



“How long ago was that?”



“Last year. It's when I went down to make some adjustments on my order to my Rolls.”



“You've got a Rolls!”



“Yeah, hang on, let me see where it is because it's on it's way to Hannibal. My ex decided to vandalize it.”



“Why?”



“Well, let me explain it. You'll look at it and you'll see no damage. Me, I'll look at it and see damage...nearly ten thousand in damage.”



“How?”



“Have you heard of Michelin's Aero tires?”



“No.”



“Well, it's a tire they've got out which is in limited production. It's an awesome looking thing in the fact you've got the outer tread and then, you've got the part next to the wheel, but in between where they normally have sidewall, you've got a whole series of vees which you can see through. It doesn't ever go flat and you'd think it would ride rough, but they've got it so it runs really springy soft like a normal tire except you can run the thing like a hundred and sixty over bricks and not have a blow out.”



“Ok, so what'd he do to them?”



“He took the damned things off and put on tires which are normal. Now, don't ask me how, but he got some Rolls wheels which look just like the one's I've got and he had those put on instead.”



“What'd he do with the other ones?”



“They're in the garage, but what you don't know there is with Rolls, it's about the warranty. When they warrant something, it's like for life until you violate the warranty. With that wheel for that tire, they had to make it special so that wheel is warranted for that tire and for that car. With it having others put on and done so at a BF Goodrich dealer instead of the factory authorized dealer, it's probably gotten the warranty fucked on it.

I'll have to call them and tell them it wasn't me, but with me being pissed and telling them to drive it to Missouri instead of keeping it out in South Carolina, that distance might do something and then, I'm up shit creek with a million dollar car.”



“A million dollars!”



“Everyone says that like that it's astronomical, but really, it's not. It's a completely customized Rolls and not like anyone else's, so it's special. It's colors no one else has and it's got more things in it and on it than anyone else, so it's a one of a kind car. Plus, it's a convertible in material which is customized for me to use as a top which is amazing.”



“Why?”



“It's bulletproof and it looks like a normal top except it's black with red stitching and looks awesome. I'll tell you I'm really proud of it.”



“Why did you go for all that money though?!”



“Let me explain it to you and then, you can see. With a Rolls, you know as well as I if you look at it and it's ten, twenty, thirty, or fifty years old, it's still a Rolls and it's an awesome looking car.

Now, how many bulletproof Caddies do you see from the early seventies which look like shit? AND, what are those cars worth?

With this Rolls, it's worth a million bucks today and I'll drive it forever. Then, when I croak, your young ass can sell it and get your Bugatti which is new and costs thirty million then, and you'll be able to pay for it from the sale of my old Rolls.”



He laughed, “So you intend on keeping it forever and not ever getting rid of it.”



“There's no need to get rid of it. It's a Rolls.”



“Ok, I'm understanding it better, but it's still a lot to pay for a car.”



“Yup, but it's the lifetime car for me. Yeah, I'll buy others, but that car will hold down the fleet.”



“Fleet?”



“Yeah, you have to understand I've come about having a fleet of vehicles. Now mind you, I didn't intend on having a fleet, but what I didn't know was my first lover, Tony, made me think he was trading off my cars, but in reality, he was putting them in a garage and buying me others.

So, last year, when I bought all my media and that company, his brother told me, “You know we've got all those cars in the garage, don't you?” and I was blown away.

What I'm doing now is I'm getting the vettes taken to New York so they can be driven when we're up there. The main one, which is the Hemi Cuda Convertible is going to stay in Kansas City under protection because it's worth something like half a million.”



“Really?”



“It's the one Tony had when I met him. What you don't know back then was Dodge had cars made especially for Road courses and Tracks, hence the RT designation.

The Cuda is one of those racing cars. It's got the factory fiberglass hood, fenders, doors, and you'd think it looks like shit, but because of the rarity of the model and since it's one of the Pace Car models turned into a race car and has all those parts which are super rare, and because it's a numbers original car with the hemi engine and the rarity of the color combination with roll bars in a convertible, it's a half a million dollar car.”



“Man!”



“Now, let me tell you how much I loved that car. When we got together, I loved that car. When he said he traded it for a Thunderbird, I was sick, but I drove the wheels off the Thunderbird and life went on. But the moment I heard there was a garage someplace with all the cars in it, I didn't once ask about the vettes, I asked about that Cuda. As soon as I learned it was there, I went to it and just bawled.”



He chuckled, “You had to loved it.”



“It was the part of him which was honest and it stirs memories in me about what it was like when we were first together when I was young, innocent, and gullible enough to believe anything he told me. That all changed, but that car reminds me why I fell in love with him.”



“I understand, it's like a romantic spot, or a restaurant.”



“Yeah, but let me tell you about my truck. You're going to see it and meet someone I've got to tell you about.”



“Ok”



“The person is Jaymes. You're going to meet him and break his heart.”



“Why?”



“Because he wants me and I'll tell you if things were different, I'd gladly be in a relationship with him. Instead, I'm helping him get a career going as a model, television star, and a movie star.

I'll also tell you upfront all I've got is going to be his some day.”



“Why?”



“Here's how this works. I got Willed the ring. I'll tell you it will never go to Dave. If Dave has kids and I see one shows promise, I'll think about that, but Dave doesn't get the ring.

With Jaymes, I see me when I was young. I'll tell you he's too much like me when I was young. He's nineteen and he's hot for this old dude, but I'll also tell you it's not for my money, what I can do for him, or anything superficial, it's because he's gotten to know me and he's fallen for that.”



“Why not pick him?”



“There's a problem. I'll tell you there are some things I can't make myself do as much as I want and that's why. With him, his Dad and I were lovers in high school. If I got together with him, it'd be him constantly wondering if he measured up and his Dad wondering if I'm with him for that, or what we had and wondering what it'd be like to still be with me...and seeing his son get all those advantages. It's too much of a brainfuck for me to consider, but I'll tell you if we did get together, it'd be hot.

That's why I'm going to ask you to consider letting him use your place in New York also. He's going to have work there and his Dad might have work there as a model, so they'll need a place to stay.

Now, if you don't want to think about it, I'll arrange for somewhere else, but it'd help me a lot if you'd consider it.”



“His Dad and him both?”



“Yeah, his Dad is a college coach right now, but he's about to retire. When he retires, we're getting them in a television series together and we're going to have them advertising products from our companies.”



“Ok, so it's nothing romantic.”



“No, but you do need to know we had a lot of photos taken which will be the video for my song, “You Can't Do That To Me”.”



“That's no problem.”



“It could be. I'll tell you now we're making out pretty hard and heavy in them.”



“So, it's a video! Right?”



“Yeah, watch this and you'll see what I'm doing with it when I tell you afterwards.”



“Ok”



I handed him my phone and pressed play. He watched and said, “Man! That's hot! I love the song.”



I told him about how I intended it to come across and he said, “That's totally inventive, I like it!”



“Thanks, it came to me and I ran with it. What we're doing for 'Baby, I'm Sorry', will be way different. I'll tell you now it's going to be painful and be in black and white and gradually go over to a pale pale blue for the last scene which will be in a baby's nursery where I'm walking around looking at things and then going to the empty crib.”



“Oh man!”



“I want the words of that song to have everyone thinking and then, me subtly having people think about abortion.”



“Ooh”



“Yeah, it's controversial, but let me tell you what turned me off on abortion.

Back in the 80's, I knew a girl named Jennifer. We worked together and she was that sort of girl everyone thought of as a little sister. She was sweet and she was gullible when it came to guys.

She got together with a guy who was cute and about as deadly to her as a viper. They got together and from outward appearances, they were America's sweethearts, but he abused her about every way you could and then, when people intervened and saved her, she found out she was pregnant.

Well, after all that, I'll tell you I was ready to drive her to get one myself. She got one and we all wiped our brows with relief.

Then, she got together with this other guy and in less than a month, she's knocked up again and in less than another month, she's bangin' on the doctor's door again.

Well, that split them up and she gets together with a guy who was just a doll. He had the surfer boy looks, looked good with her, treated her amazing, and then, he ran off to the Gulf War and politely told her he didn't want her anymore when he got back home. It was too late, she's knocked up again and guess what...she's back that that doctor for the third time in a year's period of time.

Now, I'm sorry, but in that situation, it's not like it was the first. Suddenly, she's using it for birth control instead of telling them to wear the latex.”



“Man!”



“It irked the shit out of me and I won't even begin to tell you all the times I've heard that shit happens.

Now, I can understand a situation where it's abusive as hell with the guy and she was going to have to have a kid where she's got to go through having it, then giving him visitations and go through all that mental hell.

But, what really gets me is I really thought I was pro choice, but in prison, I found I was pro life. What I mean is you see guys you know on death row and you know that day is going to come for them where it's an eye for an eye and the state will have killed them.”



“Yeah, but that's for hardened killers.”



“Bullshit, there's a guy on death row in Missouri I know who is innocent. He's up for taking part in a murder and I'll tell you I know for a fact he couldn't have been there.”



“Why?”



“Why is he up on death row? Or, why do I know he's innocent?”



“Ok, both.”



“He's on death row because of a corrupt police department in St. Louis. You might think I'm ragging on the police down there, but I'll tell you they're slicker than the LAPD because their beatings happen in the interrogation chamber.

In there, guys go in for questioning and suddenly, they've confessed to murders. I'll tell you and point to you three times I've known it's happened and I'll tell you each time, they confessed.”



“Ok, now how do you know he's innocent?”



“This is going to fry your gourd but I know he's innocent because the guy was in my house in my bed getting fucked that night. He's more girl than me in drag and there's absolutely no way he could've been on that bridge at that time raping two girls and throwing them off the bridge.”



“Were you with him?”



“Nope. I was in the kitchen trying to figure out how in the hell to set the digital clock on my stove. I know who was with him and I know the guy tried all different ways to let them know he was innocent, but it's turned into a cluster fuck of confusion so bad, it's terrible.”



“Why?”



“Ok. At that time, I was in St. Louis. I'd bought a whole block of houses and was rehabbing them into something I could sell and make money.

At my house, there were four bedrooms upstairs. I had it looking good and friends would come over and spend the night.

That night, I had just bought an electric Jenn Aire stove and couldn't figure out how to set the clock. Later, I found out it was because it was the clock and not me.

Here's how I know exactly what time it was and what time he was there. First of all, I worked until midnight. I worked at a factory and was a supervisor, so when the shift ended at eleven, everyone else went home and I stayed half an hour handing over the place to the night shift super and then drove home thirty minutes to get there.

I'll also tell you no one went in my place while I wasn't there.”



“Ok”



“So, the way it went was I went home and when the bars would shut, they'd come by because they lived with parents, or others who didn't tolerate beds shaking the walls at that time and I really didn't care.

On that night, Gregg showed up with Reggie and I was surprised, not because Gregg was with a black guy, but because Gregg actually found someone I knew and thought was a great guy.”



“Ok”



“You see, Reggie's from a great family. His parents are great people, but I'll tell you he gorgeous to look at and was a very yuppy, preppy kid. He just looked to me to be a guy who would amount to something some day and him being in bed with Gregg sort of made me cringe because Gregg was he sort of guy who was the effs.”



“What's that mean?”



“Find 'em, fuck 'em, forget 'em, and fuck 'em over if they wanted a second go 'round.”



“Oh!”



“With him bringing Reggie in, I'm cringing because I liked Reggie and knew he'd end up hurt by Gregg, but I can't live life for people, so I let them scoot the bed around and squeak the springs and spent my time programming my stove.”



“What happened?”



“Well, here's how I know what time it was. All the while I was trying to program it, I was using my cell phone to call time and temperature...and no, I didn't think about trusting the clock on the phone...and yes, my hair was dyed blond at the time.”



He laughed, “Ok, so what happened?”



“They got done fucking and Gregg true to style hopped out, grabbed clothes, and ran out the door leaving Reg there. Reg came down and was upset, so I drove him home.

The next morning, it's all over the news and suddenly, they've got Reggie down there questioning him and he's confessing to doing it!”



“Oh man!”



“Yeah, but here's what has pissed me about it. I called his Mom and she's like, “My son's not queer, don't you dare put that out about him!” It's like the woman would rather see her son die in the death chamber than admit he's gay.

Gregg tried helping him by being dumb enough to go to the police station and now is in prison on trumped up charges. His testimony is now fucked because the cross examination would have him being a felon and you know none of them are to be believed.

So, as I said, it's a mess and the only thing I can say is I've tried everything. I even went to the point of telling my friend the Governor about it so he could exonerate him on his way out and he didn't. So, either the man thought of his career in politics before he thought of another person's life, or he was in so much shit, he was afraid it'd be overturned with the new Governor.”



“What's that mean?”



“It means our Governor is married, but it's a sham. He's gay and has a lover. He didn't realize all his emails and incoming emails and explicit language in them were a part of the Sunshine Law. So, he got told and of course, he went in and deleted all the sons of bitches to protect himself and everyone and went down in shame over it. Now, he's out and I don't know if he'll ever be able to be elected to another office. I'll tell you I consider him to be a friend, but think it's a crying shame he didn't help Reggie when it was available to him.

What I do want you to do is I want you to read all the story on the web. There are things I've not told you which you'll read which will just have you screaming mad at the world like I get when I get to talking about all the details.”



“Ok, it sounds fishy.”



“Yup, now I'll tell you one thing and then, I'll shut up about it.”



“Ok”



“The girls had a cousin on the bridge that night. The guy SAID he was up there and was made to jump after fighting for the girl's lives.

Now, it was April, it's cold and that water was like forty degrees when he jumped seventy feet from a bridge into it.”



“Ok”



“Now, let me ask you this...if you jump from a bridge, and you run to a phone and call the police, and they arrive in less than five minutes, are your clothes going to be perfectly dry?”



“No”



“Hang on because I'm not done with that fucker.”



He chuckled, “Ok”



“Is your hair going to be perfectly combed and dry?”



“No.”



“How about your glasses. I mean your hands are supposed to be behind your back, and it's a pretty hard splat when you hit that water. What would they be like?”



“Ummm, you're going to tell me he had them on?”



“He had them on when he went off the bridge, and they were in fine repair when the police got there. He also had on shoes and clean white socks. I'll tell you now, if you go in a muddy damned river, your socks are going to be soaked and they're going to be tan or brown. I've had too many pairs of underwear that color when I was stoned and decided to go swimming with my clothes on when I was a teen. I'll tell you that now.”



“What happened with him?”



“Let me tell you. The police had their man. They took him in and beat the dog fuck out of him and he confessed. Then, his family got a high priced lawyer and that lawyer threatened to sue the fuck out of the city and those police officers and low and behold, they dropped the charges and stuck 'em to four black kids.

Now, I'll be honest and tell you the bridge was known as drug sales paradise. I'll be honest and tell you when they got to my house, they smelled real strong of weed, so Reg probably did go to the bridge earlier like he said he did and yes, they did find a flashlight there with his fingerprints on it, but the guys said he was complaining about leaving his flashlight on the bridge when they left about ten pm, so you know what my next question is going to be.”



“What's that?”



“Damn, did you ever do drugs?”



“Yeah.”



“Buy them?”



“Yeah.”



“When you buy drugs, do you go back and get your flashlight if you leave it?”



“Oh hell no!”



“See...he would've gotten shot if he had. I'll tell you he played it smart, but that flashlight put him there and that lying bastard who calls himself their cousin said the guys who did that to them used the flashlight.

Now, let me ask you this. If I'm dumb enough to use a flashlight to go to a drug buy, and you happen to be there in the dark and see a flashlight later, are you going to take it and use it?”



“Probably, but not buying drugs, I sure wouldn't want to turn it on and have everyone seeing a flashlight.”



“Smart move. Now, I admit it wasn't smart of him to take it, but is that enough evidence to convict a man of murder?”



“No.”



“What about DNA? I mean, they say the girls were raped, but when they fished them out of the river, they couldn't prove that and there's no DNA matching him. There's nothing there from the supposed rape scene and nothing there putting him even being there with the girls except a flashlight.”



“And he got convicted?”



“You're forgetting they beat him into a confession. They had it taped. They had it done without a lawyer present. And, they have him on tape asking for a lawyer all beat to hell.”



“Oh man!”



“That's justice in St. Louis, Missouri. Kevin got beat there. Another guy I know got beat there. Reggie got beat there. And, that white guy who lawyered up got beat there. All of them questioned by the same guy and I'll tell you it's a fact the guy who was questioning question is the uncle of one of the suspects in Kevin's murder.”



“Who's Kevin?”



“He's my ex I was with for fourteen years. We met in prison. He went in for a murder and yeah, he did it, but I'll also tell you there were two other guys there. They admit to being there and one will tell you to your face he actually killed the guy and not Kevin.”



“What?!”



“Here's what happened. Kevin had a cousin who was a bullying motherfucker. I'll tell you that, Kevin will tell you that, and there's affidavits of testimony where twelve other kids all said the same thing.”



“Ok”



“Well, it was Kevin's cousin. They went hunting in a park in St. Louis, and yes, it's illegal as hell, but no, they do it all the time there and not many people get caught.”



“Ok”



“So, they go and they're walking along and suddenly, the bruiser turns around and puts the muzzle of his gun at Kevin's brother's forehead. He said, “What would you do if I pulled the trigger?”

“Oh man!”



“Well, Kevin put his rifle up against the man's throat and he told him, “you do and I'll kill you.”



“Ok, I'd do the same thing.”



“So would I. Now, let me ask you a question. In that situation, are you looking at your brother, or are you looking that bastard dead off in his eyes and showing him no fear.”



“I'd be ready to kill.”



“So was Kevin.

What happened next is Kevin heard the gun go off and he pulled the trigger.”



“Oh man, did his brother die?”



“No, the dumb son of a bitch pulled the gun off to the side and tried making a cruel joke out of it. That joke cost him his life.”



“Serves him right.”



“ Yeah, but here's what you don't know.”



“Alex is Kevin's brother. You'll meet him some day and he'll tell you he loves me and you better do me right, or he'll kill you and mean it.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, it's strange because Alex is one of Gino's men and I didn't know he was related to Kevin back then, but I'll tell you I was really attracted to him.”



“Wow! That's a small world!”



“Yup, but here's what happened. The shot next to Alex's head hurt his ear with the sound. Kevin pulled the trigger and took out the threat and saw Alex on the ground and went down to help him.”



“Ok, I can see that.”



“Kevin says he zoned out. I'll tell you I imagine after killing someone in that situation and being that age, I would too.”



“How old was he?”



“Sixteen, but barely sixteen. I'll also tell you he wasn't a very mature kid and very big. He was probably my size.”



“Oh man!”



“So he went down to help Alex, sees he's hurt, and immediately left the body and the other guys there. I would too.”



“Yeah, me also.”



“So, that's where that scene ends for Kevin...except he was honest. They took Alex to the hospital and he tells the story. The police go and Kevin took them to the body except the body's been moved and the guy is now against a tree and he's been used as a target and is riddled with bullets.”



“What?!”



“The other boys used their rifles and shot the kid and then, used Kevin's and shot him and then used Alex's.”



“Oh man, those are some cruel dudes.”



“Yeah. But, one is that police detective's nephew and his best friend.”



“Oh man.”


“Yeah, so Alex is in the hospital and Kevin's taken to questioning.”



“Ok”



“The television news crew is there because that story was just too gruesome to ignore, but what they catch on tape is Kevin being taken into questioning healthy and later, when he's brought out, his lips are busted, his throat has strangulation marks, his eyes are blackened, and his wrists are broken from being tied behind him and being knocked over in a chair on them. There were also broken ribs from where he was knocked over in the chair and the arms of the chair broke them.

BUT, they drag him out in front of the media and announce he's confessed.”



“Oh man!”



“What I'll tell you is hell yes he's confessed! He's confessed to doing his part, but then, you see stop and gos in the tape and each time, you see him beat a little more and you see him confessing to knowing all the gauges of all the guns and knowing exactly what sort of ammunition was fired.

Now, I'll tell you there've been times I went hunting, but I'll tell you I did know the gauge of the gun but I couldn't tell you anything except maybe it was a red shotgun shell or a green one. I sure couldn't tell you which brand and all that.”



“You've seen the tapes?”



“Hon, let me tell you something. Alex is Kevin's little brother. He's smart and he's cagey. When he grew up, he deliberately got to be a police officer in that precinct so he could get into the evidence lockers and get all that evidence. I'll tell you he got all that and more.

So, when we got out of prison, Alex brought all the evidence to me and I watched it, viewed it and see what I saw and know it's a helluva murder scene and if a defense attorney worth anything had had the case, you'd see him walking on it. BUT, he didn't have an attorney interested in the case, he had Jimmy Hoffa's daughter and all she wanted was a conviction because she was appointed to the bench and that case was keeping her off it.”



“Oh man!”



“She'll tell you he wasn't guilty, but did she give a shit? Nope. She'll not admit to it being the case which held her off the bench, but I can show you court dates and times and show you the very afternoon after she sold his ass down the river, she was appointed to the bench. You go figure.”



“If you were his defense attorney, how would you get him off?”



“First of all, the blood spatter pattern on the leaves as to where Kevin said he shot the guy is there. You see drag marks, and you also see impressions as to where Alex fell and you see leaf ripple and pellets where his cousin pulled the gun off and shot. It points right to where the spatter pattern is and not over to the side.

Now, you have Kevin and Alex's statements there stating the two other boys were there, but in Kevin's confession, he's made to recant they weren't there.

I'll tell you they were because I deliberately went there and spoke with one. He told me he did it and he also told me he killed the guy because he was still breathing and he was pissed off about what he did because he was upset because he felt the pellets the guy shot go by him.”



“Oh man!”



“Yeah, but was he questioned? Nope. Was the detective's nephew questioned? Nope and was he there? Yeah, I mean, I went over and asked the guy and he ran away like a bitch and called the police on me. They came and harassed me and told me I'd be taken in.”



“Oh man, I bet you were scared.”



“No, I'll tell you what I did. I pulled out my cell phone and called David in front of them and told him they were threatening to take me in for torture and interrogation. Do you want to know how damned fast they got calls to their patrol car and got told to get the fuck away from me? AND, do you want to know how fast St. Louis' guys were there around me?”



He laughed, “I bet you he had people there fast.”



“Not only that, but I'll tell you it pissed me and that's when I went to the guy's apartment and had them kick it in and we made him answer the questions with me holding a voice recorder in front of him. He answered and gave the story and then, he also admitted his uncle was the investigating detective.

I will also tell you I got a phone call threatening me about it from that detective and tore up the phone line to Dave who personally came over and beat the dog fuck out of the guy with a lot of his guys. I'll also tell you the man was laying there denying he made the call and Dave showed him the phone record for my phone and that it came from his house number exactly. That's when Dave told the guy to forget us and if we so much had one more problem in that city, he would personally kill the man.”



“I bet!”



“Since then, Kevin's told me to forget it, but it pisses me because he did twenty two years over that murder.”



“How old is Kevin?”



“Now?”



“Yeah.”



“Forty seven. He's eleven years older than me.”



“How old is Alex?”



“Alex is five years older than me.”



“Oh!”



I held up my phone and said, “That's Kevin there and over here is Alex.”



“They don't look anything alike.”



“Different dads. That's a messy story, but I'm not getting into it. We got sidetracked and what I want you to do is look at the websites for Reggie and see them. I'll tell you I want to do a movie to bring about exposure for it, but I imagine I'd get the hell sued out of me by his family.”



“If you can get two people to state they knew him and he is gay, you've got yourself covered.”



“I probably can, but it takes people caring and I imagine the rednecks in the system would go from chanting 'kill the nigger' to 'kill the faggot', so all I've managed to do is change the mantra.”



“You can't give up.”



“I've tried, but when you've got a personal friend in the Governor's seat and you can't get a pardon, then it's damned hard to think a stranger in there is going to let him off.”



An inspiration hit me. “Hon, what do you think if you did a documentary about it and narrated it? Would you do it?”



“Yeah, let me read the sites. I want to read everything.”



“Ok, that's fair. I'll tell you there's overwhelming evidence about it and you'll see a lot is out there.”



“Good.”



“I was surprised about the internet, but when I did a search for Reggie Clemons and Reginald Clemons on the internet, I was amazed at how powerful the internet is.”



“It's hard for me because I can hardly remember there not being an internet. I don't know what it'd be like without it.”



“Rough. I'll tell you researching things before wasn't as complete and concise as it is now. I'll tell you how fast the internet is. Do you remember when the bridge went down in Minneapolis?”



“Yeah.”



“For me, I am a Wikopedia person. I love it and thought, “Man! I can hardly wait...I've got a chance to actually post something on it!” So, I get on there and boom, not only do they have it on there, but the person who posted it wrote it like he was a reporter.”



“Really?!”



“Yeah, I mean I'm watching it on CNN and it's live and it was within the first hour, so that tells you how fast it updates itself. I imagine when the story goes out about us, it'd be best for us to put it out otherwise it's going to be a friggin' mess.”



“How do you want to do it?”



“Our 'My Space' and 'Facebook' pages are going to have to change first. I'll also tell you at the same time that happens, we're going to have to have a YouTube update and you should already know there's a posting on there of you kissing a guy on stage someplace.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, it's real grainy, but it's you and you're singing a song where you had the guy pulled up and singing to him.”



“I do that, and yes, there's been guys occasionally.”



“This guy was a little guy like me and I believe he was Asian.”



“Really?”



“Look it up. You'll see it.”



“It upsets me when I see how many things are on there which are my videos.”



“I'll tell you now to leave them be. They're fans and they love you. It's better to love your fans back than be like Prince and sue them.

That in one full swoop has made it so I could give a shit less if I ever see Prince again and you sure won't hear me supporting him...however I do have a nice crotch shot of him.”



“Really?”



“Yeah.”



“Any of me?”



“I don't think so. My attraction for you has me having your videos on my computer, but you've missed the boat on a lot of things which cash in on your sex appeal. We'll get that changed though.”



“I don't ever think I got asked to do any.”



“Wrong, I'm willing to bet your manager was asked and he turned it down thinking you'd lose royalties.”



“Do they?”



“When you get to my house, you'll see. When we go out on tour, we'll cash in. You'll be amazed at how much photographs and everything get raised just by having an autograph on them.”



“Wow!”



“Yeah, but I'll show you some videos and show you how I want my traveling stage to look.”



“Ok”



“Go get my laptop and open it to the .flv files.”



“What's .flv?”



“Flash video. That's what's on YouTube and on a lot of sites when you can't right click and capture them. If you go to Google, you can get good quality .flv capture programs without spam in them.”



“Hang on.”



I looked at the weather and saw we were looking good for the weather. Thinking about it, I looked at my car's surveillance and saw it parked. I looked all around and said, “En?”



“Yeah.”



“You're not going to believe this, but my car is parked at Hannibal's airport!”



“Really?! Why wouldn't it be?”



“It was in South Carolina tonight. I thought they were driving it home, but it looks like they probably flew it.”



I did a double check with the GPS locator of it and saw it was indeed there.



“My GPS locator on it says it's there.”



“Cool!”



“We're going to beat the rain. At least we won't have to take a taxi in.”



“How much longer?”



“Thirty minutes.”



“That was a fast trip.”



“We've been keeping each other entertained.”



“Can we get some sleep when we get there?”



“Yeah, as soon as I make sure the dogs are let out, we'll go to bed.”



He brought in the laptop and I pulled up the search and looked for Sabrina and 'All of Me' and 'Boys, Boys, Boys' and when they came up, I put them on full screen. Soon, the cockpit was full of sound.



“Oh man! Where is this?!”



“Moscow. It's a show they have over there.”



“Man, that's awesome!”



“It's all got something moving. I love it because I can see the band up on the top leaving me down below putting on the show and having enough room to add in a lot of things.”



“It's just full. I see lasers.”



“The more you watch it, the more you see. That's what amazes me.”



“What's that writing?”



“All their sponsors. It's one big billboard for them, but you see a lot of things in it.”



“You look better than her. You'd look awesome in that outfit she's got on.



“Yeah, I like the top she's got on.”



“How do you get it so you look like you've got breasts?”



“In that outfit of Pinks, there's water bra inserts. They push from the side so the skin shows them looking like they're entirely real.”



“It sort of freaked me out.”



“I'm sorry about how you were brought on stage like that and how I made you look.”



“That was ok. I didn't know that one song.”



“It's by Taylor Dayne. That song made her career take off. She paid for all of it and got it on MTV. Suddenly, she had a hit and didn't even have a record contract!”



“Wow!”



“One thing I want to tell you is we're going to tour internationally. If you're on the tour, I'll most likely have Gladys opening and then me on and then you. You're going to be the biggest star over there.”



“You think?”



“Oh yeah and with you able to sing in Spanish, Spain is going to be insane.”



I said, “Ummm, hon.”



“Yeah.”



“Put that away, it's time for me to take it down. We're going to be hitting some turbulence when it happens.”



“Ok. How do I shut it off.”



“The green light and then shut it. You can lay it on the floor.”



“Where are we now?”



“About sixty miles away. That little town there is where I went to college.”



“Really?”



“Yeah, some day, I'll take you up there to do a concert and we'll eat the pizza there. There's a pizza chain called Pagliai's pronounced Pauly eyes which is amazing. I had an apartment above it which caused me to basicly survive on the stuff. I wasn't complaining, but that's when I put weight on.”



“You were heavy?”



“Well, for me, a hundred and fifty pounds is pudgy as all get out.”



“What's that over there?”



“Ethanol plant. That's what they put in gasoline to boost the octane.”



“It's sure putting out the steam!”



“Yeah, and I'll tell you the energy used to produce the stuff wastes more energy than it makes, but because it's a way to subsidize farmers, it's getting the green lights in Washington.”



“Under us is a railroad. Real soon, I'll be buying it. Down to the edge of this town coming up, you'll see a plant I worked at. It makes car parts for General Motors. This scar on my wrist is from an air conditioner pump of theirs.”



“Wow!”



“It's been there for seven years. It'll probably be there the rest of my life. It's that place which caused all the scars on my knuckles. I got to the point I figured out I was a whore for my skin there and quit the place.”



“What's that mean?”



“Each scar was a paycheck. That place wasn't safe at all. The way it went there, if you missed a finger, you were there five years. If you missed an arm, you were there ten. If you were dead of lung cancer, you got their retirement plan...the grave.”



“Really?”



“I wore a surgical mask there. By the end of the shift, it was gray from all the aluminum dust floating in the air. When you figure all those people breathed that in every day, you saw why they were dropping like flies...and yet, I got told not to wear the mask because I was scaring people. That's what put me over the top with wanting to quit the place.”



“I see the light.”



“Yup. That bright light city right next to it is our hospital complex. When you figure all those buildings are a hospital, cancer treatment center, heart attack center, and that biggest building is the clinic housing four hundred doctors for a town not quite eighteen thousand people, you're going to have to have a lot of illnesses to sustain it. We do.”



“Why?”



“North of town is BASF plant which makes herbicides and weed killers everyone uses like Round Up and South of town is a cement plant which burns toxic waste to generate the heat it takes to make cement. Between the two is Hannibal. It doesn't take much to figure out what's killing us.”



“And you want to stay here?”



“I'm not brain dead yet. What I mean is brain cancer here is something like four thousand times higher here than anywhere else on the planet except China, but they say they test the air and it's fine. I'll tell you to test the water because not a mile up the river from where they take in the water for us to drink is the out valve for BASF. When you look at the cancer I've had, and you see where our camp was, you can sort of understand why I got it.”



“You've had cancer?!”



“Yeah, three times.”



“My God!”



“I don't drink the water from here anymore, but let me tell you something way weird.”





“What's that?”



“The biggest plant here is one which makes Progresso soup, Old El Paso everything, Accent Season Salt, and most of the breakfast bars and rice treats everyone eats. In the area where they make the soup, they boil the water to cook the beans and all that and those women breathe that steam and have some strange diseases...and yet, everyone deems that shit safe to eat.”



“Wow, I never thought of where they make all that. I see it advertised all over.”



“Hannibal has the motto of “America's Hometown” and I'll tell you with what is made here, it should be “We Feed America Every Day” because all that's made here and another plant makes all the grills for McDonald's.”



“Really?”


“Yup, my brother works there as a welder...well, my oldest one. He doesn't claim me, but fuck him.”



“How many brothers and sisters do you have?”



“Three brothers and one sister. She's the baby of the bunch and sure got spoiled.”



“Where do you fall in?”



“Second oldest. When I write, I tell everyone I've got two little brothers, but that's the way it really is. I don't mention my older brother. That's nothing caustic, that's just the truth.”



“Who are you closest with?”



“It used to be Brent, but he got married. Since he got married, he's turned into a yuppy preppy judgemental pussy whipped motherfucker and now, it's back to being Jilli. Growing up, it was Jilli and me against all them.”



“Ok, we're going to land here. Hang on.”



“Where's the lights?”



“They turn on about half a mile out. You've got to sort of guess with this place. Me, I've done it enough to know if I come in low over that highway building, we're on the runway.”



“Man! You're not kidding!”



“See, there's the lights.”



“That's nuts!”



“They like to keep the light bill low out here.”



We touched down and I hopped on the brakes and reversed the thrust.



“Whoa!” he said sounding excited. “What was that?”



“Reverse thrust. It slows us down instead of propelling us forward.”



We got to a stop and then, I put it forward at a crawl.



“Is it always like that?”



“Yeah, if you want to live!”



“At all airports?”



“Yeah, and in all jets.”



We went over to the hangar and I took us in. I stopped and said, “We're home.”